Confessions Of A Nurse Who Compulsively Eats - page 3

by TheCommuter 7,100 Views | 30 Comments Senior Moderator

Iíve previously mentioned that an individual cannot begin to address a problem without first admitting that he or she has one. Well, my name is TheCommuter and I am a long-time compulsive eater. There it is! Compulsive eating... Read More


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    I have binging tendencies as well. My weight constantly fluctuates by 10-20 pounds. I wake up and go to sleep thinking of food. Constantly eating just because I enjoy it, not because I'm hungry. I am unhappy with my current weight but have no self-control. I haven't determined what triggered this for me..may be worth looking into. Does this ever happen for no clear cause?
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    I have binge eating disorder. It's not uncommon for me to get a half dozen donuts in the morning AFTER eating breakfast and down them on the way to work in secret. I've had eating disorders since I'm 7 and I'm so screwed up from it all that I don't know the first thing about normal eating. I've tried working with dieticians who specialize with eating disorders and do really well for a while and then fall off the wagon after a few weeks. It's so frustrating!
    DizzyLizzyNurse likes this.
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    Quote from 08RNGrad
    I haven't determined what triggered this for me..may be worth looking into. Does this ever happen for no clear cause?
    Binge-eating is usually triggered during one's growing-up years when eating patterns are first formed. However, a traumatic experience in early adulthood might have triggered it. Who knows. All I know is that the vast majority of binge eating has some type of emotional component.

    Another theory exists which explains that some people have more addictive personalities than others. I come from a family full of addicts (alcohol, drugs, food) who are using nonconstructive ways to numb their emotional turmoil. After all, if we're eating even when we're not hungry, we're addicted to the food.

    I should also mention that my maternal grandmother weighed more than 400 pounds when she died more than ten years ago. She was a food addict and compulsive eater who feasted on every edible part of the pig.
    DizzyLizzyNurse likes this.
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    Www.oa.org/oa podcasts/

    Here are some OA podcasts you all might find helpful.
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    This took courage, both to explore and write, as well as to post. Kudos to you, who knows how many ppl you are helping by posting this?
    I am not entirely certain i am an official binge eater, as it only occurred late in my life, in my 50s, and this thread sort of gives me impression, it's more a lifelong habit.
    But, whether or not i would 'officially' fit under that umbrella, most of the descriptors seem to fit me NOW, and all the effects are now worsened, by my post-menopausal metabolism. (for real, menopause, for me, was like that scene in Avatar movie, where he wakes up in an entirely new and foreign body to live in).


    but, at any rate, i sure do identify with the self-deprecating feelings/overeating cycle that can occur, when extra weight is on board. I put on 30 to 40 lbs after my ovaries died. I have a floppy valves, and that was enough weight to exacerbate my arrhythmias, and i was headed to becoming a cardiac cripple.
    I've studied quite a bit, learned quite a bit about what works, what doesn't. I found the documentary series "Weight of The Nation" to be informative, and lines of that film still come to me often, as i stand in front of the fridge. That film interviewed many experts as well as ppl who have lost 100s of pounds.....
    a fairly unforgettable film for anyone interested in this topic of weight control.


    I've got about half of that 30 or 40 lbs of overweight back off now, already my heart is calming down a bit again,
    and it helped me a lot to join "MyFitnessPal.com"
    which is free website. It took me a few days to get the hang of using that site. (anyone who does join that site, i recommend you stay OUT of "The Forums" as it is mostly inane chatter there,
    BUT, some of the "subgroups" there, if you search for them, like "Heart problem group" or "women over 50", etc etc, some of these 'subgroups' are very helpful)

    One has to log all food into their "food diary" there,
    an activity which might appeal to anyone with any form of OCD. Even logging my food intake, just that, in and of itself,
    was a very vital first step for me to begin to return towards health.

    That website doesn't endorse any particular diet, but instead, focuses on a lifestyle change. ONe remark someone on MyFitnessPal wrote, which stuck with me, is,
    //"I've tried every diet in the book, and most of the time, i did lose weight. But, it always came right back. Always. But here i am learning how to live...how to eat correctly, forever and ever. NOt a "diet", but, instead, a new way to approach food. When we "diet" we learn nothing, and after we've lost the weight, we immediately return to our previous bad habits that got us heavy in the first place. that is why i gain it all back, again, and again.
    But here, i am learning how to eat for the rest of my life."//

    her words
    made sense to me, so i'm trying this now, just slowly RE-learning how to eat appropriately all over again, and trying to develop better eating habits again, and learning how to substitute some of my favorite snacks, and RElearning all over again, how to crave an apple instead of a bag of chips. I am learning things, i can feel myself changing inside about what i eat.
    it IS a process, near as i can tell so far.
    DSkelton711 likes this.
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    Quote from Jean Marie46514
    But, whether or not i would 'officially' fit under that umbrella, most of the descriptors seem to fit me NOW, and all the effects are now worsened, by my post-menopausal metabolism. (for real, menopause, for me, was like that scene in Avatar movie, where he wakes up in an entirely new and foreign body to live in).
    I can totally relate to the frustrations involved with a slow metabolism. I have been hypothyroid since late 2005 and have difficulty losing weight. I can easily gain, but losing even one pound of weight requires an extraordinary effort.

    I was hyperthyroid secondary to Graves Disease from '98 to '05 and could lose weight with virtually no effort. Now, my metabolism has slowed almost to a crawl.
    somenurse likes this.
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    I really want to thank the commuter, as well as all other posters, for having the courage to admit this and share your stories with us. One of the most important aspects of improving ourselves is having a support network, wherever we may find it. Im especially relieved to know i am NOT alone. I think its interesting to note that ANYONE can be dealing with issues such as these. We have been so successful in one aspect of our lives- our career. Just getting through nursing school is a huge accomplishment. I would hope people would realize that these problems can affect anyone. Not always someone who is perceived to be "lazy", or uncaring of ourselves.
    I always found it hard to try to not be a hypocrit during the few teaching moments ive had so far (im a new nurse). How can i teach someone whats healthy, and important for them to do, when i myself am not doing it.
    Thanks guys for being so open in such a public way. I wish you all the most success in living with these daily issues, as well as finding happiness and acceptance within yourself. Good luck!
    somenurse likes this.
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    I never had this problem until after i became a nurse. Doesn't matter if I switch facilities. It's all the same stuff with evil co-workers! If it weren't for some of the attitudes at work I would never bInge eat!!!
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    I don't know if I would be fat if I weren't a nurse. Probably, but the amount of stress that nurses are subject to makes it a lot harder to get under control, I think (MHO, of course). When I was off work for nearly 2 years I lost a significant amount of weight. Now that I returned to nursing I have surpassed my highest weight. I am so ready to get off this roller coaster. Thank you, Commuter for bringing into the light what many of us experience.
    TheCommuter likes this.


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