Hello babyCatchr,

Most people who may have went thtough what you went through, would say that is the reason they were not strong enough to succeed in life. It sounds life what you experienced is what made you strong enough to persever. I almost want to say I'm sorry for what you endured, but then again, for the amazine strides and accomplishments youv'e made in spite of them, it don't seem appropiate( hope you understand what I mean) by that.

Are you currently working?

Msjam

<<sigh>> I was laid off from my teaching job because it was a religious school and my son did not hold the same religious beliefs as the school. High school children of teachers are required to pass a religious interview in order for the teacher to work there. I was also laid off from my loan officer job 2 years ago when the industry tumbled, all our lenders filed bankruptcy, and the company closed. That industry is still not doing well so it has been impossible for me to get hired by another company. Teaching jobs are also flooded with applicants and laying off teachers. Pretty discouraging. It is still very hard for me to keep my chin up!! And that makes it hard to have friends, which in turn makes me feel more hopeless. But I am my own counselor and so I am going to go back into the medical profession (I used to teach childbirth classes and assist deliveries - you would be surprised what the OBs in the hospitals have let me do!! Assisted with homebirths as well.) and try to be optimistic! Like I said, I have no choice - I've got to keep moving. I think my children motivate me.

Msjam, I also wanted to say that my sister has suffered from something very similar, which was never officially diagnosed as anything more than depression. But I know it was more than that. She lived with my mother and did not get out of bed for years, and when she finally did, it wasn't until 3 pm. She is 38 and just moved out on her own. She didn't finish high school and has never really held down a job. She was dependent on sleep meds and alcohol, but I think she is getting a little better. She won't really talk to me. Funny thing is everyone in my family is a doctor, surgeon, nurse, or lawyer. Maybe that's another thing that made me always try to get back on my feet and pursue my education, but it hasn't motivated her. So, what I really wanted to say is, light therapy - simply getting up at the same time every day and exposing yourself to sunlight, as well as keeping lighting low in the evening and turning off the computer and tv helps a great deal with the body's circadian rhythms and getting you into regular sleep cycles. My sis and I have both used that to help us.

Girl,

Do I now how hard things are, this recession and economy has almost cost me everythings. Good you have decided to back into nursing. You can probably keep a job in some area in nursing since it branches into so many areas and they need them in what ever direction you travel. I would love to be an OB nurse, that is why I was interested in being an LVN. I learned though that California, rarely use LNV in OB that its pretty much RN territory here. After having 5 children, I hoped I had something to offer in that field.

Yes, and usually having any kind of medical issue that people are unfamiliar with or have no experiences with, and God forbid a MI probably, it is hard to make and/or keep friends, hell and even some family for that matter. I never learned to be close and friendly with a lot of people because I was teased in school and my siblings were a bit older than me, so i couldn't do too much with them. I found myself limiting myself to one close close friend and my cousin and family for most of my life. Up until 7 years ago, I don't talk or communicate with any of them. SAD, makes you think differently from most people, but I like the way, type, and personality I have verse, all the people I lost, we had nothing in common. Its does get lonely, but it seems more a headache and bother, to deal with some people.

I talked your head off!

You hang in there I feel good things ahead for you!
Msjam

No worries, that's what this board is for. Yes, recession hurt me - lost over $100,000 in stock market. Banking stocks plus 2 jobs. Anyway, I believe we are on a different plane of thinking - much more philosophical, and maybe we understand and view things differently than most people due to our experiences. Most people are surface thinkers, just want to have fun, and don't know how to relate to us. Maybe we are downers? I don't know, but yes, you just have to stay away from people who don't support you. It's tough being late in life and still trying to find your career. Just think, one day when you are a nurse and it is all over, you will be around people you have something in common with and you won't stress about not having a career.

Originally Posted by msjam54

Girl,

Do I now how hard things are, this recession and economy has almost cost me everythings...
I talked your head off!

Msjam

Hi msjam54...it sounds like you are really catching it. I have the same problems during the fall and winter. I've noticed that the older I get the more depressed I become around fall and winter. I hate the cold more and more every year. I start school Aug. 24 for RN. I'm 38 years old...some may think that is still young and it is but I've never been in my fifties, etc. yet to realize that it all will work itself out. I'm 38 depressed, suffer a little SAD, GAD, and have bipolar. The meds that I am currently taking have helped me out alot...but the weather is still a problem. My boyfriend and I plan to (Lord willing) move to the warmer states, like Florida, California, Arizona, etc. (SOMEWHERE WARM) As far as the light therapy goes...my mind knows that it isn't the sun so therefore, it does not work for me. Whenever I see the sun out, I feel a little better despite it being in the fall and winter months. Not to say that it won't work for you though. Can you move to a warmer part of the country? Like the states I mentioned above.

I continue to pray and try to have faith...It is hard I admit, but I still do it because I do partially believe anyway, that it will work itself out.

Hello PennyB71 and thank you for your response!

You don't want to be 50+ for things to work out. You are 38, I read is a nursing articles that the average age for nurses is 40-45 so your still good to go. I didn't lnow SAD stod for Social Affective Disorder, is the symptoms similiar to Social Anxiety Disorder? I had never heard of light therapy before someone else on this site mentioned. I have never been diagnosed as having SAD by my doctor. I just know I have it from the signs and symptoms that listed for it. I live in California, It get 100+ degress here in the summer months hardly bareable. How does you SAD affect you, do you feel inferior, afraid of something new, or uncomfortable around people other than patients?

Hope to hear your reply"

Thanks again, Msjam54

I am in the process of becoming a CNA and I hope to start nursing school this fall. I have Social Anxiety Disorder. One thing that really helps me doing anything new is being overly prepared. I research everything before I start, ask tons of questions, read the material a million times. It lessens my overall anxiety about the procedures and also helps me when I get stuck, because I already know what I should be doing next. If I start panicking I know when I can go take a breather. Another thing that has helped me HUGELY is role-playing. It may sound silly, but role-playing in my CNA class (where we pretend another student is a patient) has lessened my fears a lot because you get used to doing/saying the same thing over and over, so by the time I got to the patient it was familiar to me to have to do that. I also practiced smiling at strangers and starting small talk (things that don't really come that naturally to me--I grew up in the NYC area, only crazy people smile at strangers lol!)
Also above all, remember 1.) BREATHE!!! and 2.) you can always get help from your instructor or the nurse you are helping...you are not alone.

Hi Pomegranate and thank you for your response.

That was good advice you gave me. I was getting through the academic part, but going to the hospital made me nervous and uneasy. If my depression had not got so bad, maybe it was cause of the winter monthss January why I was so overwhelmed. I was just so unhappy and sad during the beginning of my second semester. Care plns, did not help. I wish you all the best and success in becoming a nurse.

Msjam

I have been feeling pretty hopeless lately. I feel like I should be excited, and in a way I am, but I am 40 and single with 2 kids and just starting nursing school. I have been reading over Chem I info on the internet to prepare myself for my upcoming class. I would be overwhelmed when class starts if I didn't. Pomegranate had good advice about that. But 3-4 years with no income??? And just now establishing my career? I have worked hard all my life - working 2 jobs while going to school - and now I'm about to embark on more of it at 40??? My G*d, when do I get to enjoy life?

Excuse me, the light therapy is for Seasonal Affective Disorder, not Social Affective Disorder:
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/sea...atment/DN00013