SO mad...and not sure I should be. - page 2

Please forgive the's been a bad day. I work in a clinic that dispenses controlled substances. As such, we have various and sundry very stringent rules in place so as to prescribe as... Read More

  1. by   Glazdm
    whose life?
  2. by   nurseprnRN
    "i consider myself pro-choice. in cases of rape, incest, extreme youth, maternal danger, or a known fetal condition that will result in little to no quality of life, i support the termination of a pregnancy. not because one had no foresight to take precautions. "

    i'd agree with the indications, and add contraception failure to your list.

    however, i'm thinking that if we take her at her word, perhaps a druggie without enough foresight to take precautions isn't a real good bet for motherhood, and termination is the best option for her.

    good for recognizing where so much of your anger is coming from. it will get better...
  3. by   itsmejuli
    I feel for you OP.

    After dealing with my oxycontin injecting son and his addicted baby's mama, I have zero patience or sympathy for drug abusers. Fortunately, she didn't abuse pills while pregnant. But they did end up losing custody of the child to the state eventually.
  4. by   ktwlpn
    The fastest way to burn out is to personalize this type of patient.We have to learn to compartmentalize our own life experiences away from those of our patients and sometimes we need to look for employment in a different area as self- preservation.
    We all have things we struggle with-you are venting here and that's always good.
  5. by   AngelfireRN
    Quote from itsmejuli
    I feel for you OP.

    After dealing with my oxycontin injecting son and his addicted baby's mama, I have zero patience or sympathy for drug abusers. Fortunately, she didn't abuse pills while pregnant. But they did end up losing custody of the child to the state eventually.
    I'm so very sorry. Prayers for peace and calm going your way.
  6. by   kmartin906
    No one understands until they've been in a situation such as yours. I've had several miscarriages, and one healthy pregnancy. It makes me cringe knowing people can just so "easily" terminate their pregnancy. BUT, this is our job. We tolerate ALL kinds, and silently judge them in our heads... LOL. I know it really stinks, but what can you do? I'm sure your hormones did not help this any though either. I remember after my son was born it took absolutely NOTHING to make me angry/sad/crying/laughing...sometimes all at the same time.
  7. by   grownuprosie
    Quote from AngelfireRN
    She didn't care to announce it to the entire lobby, triage, and clinic in general.
    Of course she did not care to announce it! You made a pregnant woman talk about her termination in the lobby? I don't care if she is a drug seeker or not, discussions like that should NOT be within earshot of other patients or staff.

    Also, I don't think women that choose to terminate should be required to be solemn at all times. They made a choice. How they deal with that choice is really no ones business. They have to stay pregnant until their termination appointment. I don't think that time should be spent in a mandatory shame spiral.

    Just my 2 cents...
  8. by   VioletKaliLPN
    Pro choice does not mean "pro choice as long as I agree with the circumstances." It is not black and white, we have to separate ourselves from other individuals choices. This can also include a 102 year old CHF patient being a full code because the family cannot let go, or the patient cannot let go. It is not our job to interject our own feelings into the conversation, although we can vent about it later. Her circumstances were obviously not ideal for a child. She was on pain medication and did not wish to stop-even for a pregnancy. I am happy that she realizes that she cannot CTT because she wishes to continue using medications. (or otherdrugs) Seeing a child born addicted to meds because "mom" was against abortion, yet okay with bringing a child into this world to painfully detox just does not make sense to me.

    As a side note. I had an abortion at 20. I failed to use BC. I did have an abortion, zero regrets, so I am a lot more open minded to women seeking abortion for whatever reason. Be it failure to use BC, or their acknowledgment of choices which are not OK for pregnancy, I support these women.

    She is unwilling to CTT in a healthy way, so an abortion is her best choice IF she will not stop using drugs which harm a developing fetus.

    Hopefully my post does not offend.
  9. by   JZ_RN
    I am 100% pro-choice. Well, make that 150%. I feel a woman should be allowed to terminate a pregnancy for any reason, whatsoever, including inconvenience. It's HER life and HER body and that fetus doesn't think, see, feel pain, or have thoughts. Sorry. Am I saying she's not a crummy person otherwise? Well, I can't judge her based on what someone else says. But, we don't need more unwanted kids though, no more addicts, no more foster cases. It's her decision, let her live with it and let it go.
  10. by   Simply Complicated
    Quote from AngelfireRN
    To those that say we don't know for sure...we do. She said it flat-out. It was an inconvenience and she didn't need an inconvenience, she needed her meds. Period.

    Doesn't mean anything. Could be her way of coping with a difficult decision. Doesn't mean she is as flippant as she is playing it off, is my point.
  11. by   Simply Complicated
    I will just add, I also have a history of miscarriage, and infertility. I've spent a few years of my life in fertility treatments trying for a baby. Successfully, luckily, but I do still know the loss. Still doesn't change my opinion. I don't always agree with other people's decisions, especially those who use abortion as a form of BC. I've just learned that other people's decisions of that sort honestly have no significance in my life, them having or not having a baby doesn't directly affect my situation at all. Does it pull at my heart? Sure a little. But if I let everything I see or disagree with bother me working as a nurse, I'd have burned out a long long time ago. It's just not worth it.
  12. by   traumaRUs
    As a provider, you need to not personalize pts. If you do, you are always going to find drama and ways to be upset.
  13. by   SwansonRN
    I only support abortions when they're absolutely when a woman is pregnant and doesn't want to be

    ...sorry I can't really be on your side on this one.