Leading/Managing

  1. Is it possible to lead a group of people who were previously your peers?
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  2. 8 Comments

  3. by   jlwalker
    I need to add to the question I posted! I meant to ask "is it possible to lead a group of people, who were previously your peers, and remain friends with them?"

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  4. by   saravp
    Originally posted by jlwalker:
    I need to add to the question I posted! I meant to ask "is it possible to lead a group of people, who were previously your peers, and remain friends with them?"
    I believe you can remain friends but it will be altered from its present status. It is important to explain your new role and the expectations that accompany it. There will certainly be a difference but allow time for adjustment. You will feel differently while you adjust to this role and your peers will also. It is possible however!
  5. by   ClariceS
    I found quite a change in the staff's perception of me since I took over the role about 2 months ago. They have been supportive because I was one of them and know how things are on this floor. But they really have begun to treat me like their boss. I am not included in the "information ring" we have on the floor anymore and some are certainly not as comfortable chatting at lunch like we used to. I have also been brought more of their concerns and woes because it affects their work.
    It wasn't such a huge shock this time. I had taken over staff development on this floor about 2 years ago which was viewed as an administrative step by the general staff. That is when a couple of "let's go for dinner after work" friendships were really affected.
    I still consider myself friendly with my staff but am not included in the general staff "hanging around together" like I used to be.

    I think some of that may need to happen so you won't be accused of doing favors for those you are closer friends with or find it hard to be the boss when you need to be for fear of ruining friendships. If you have long-standing friendships outside of work with those who will be your staff, hopefully they will remember that you need them to support and respect you as the boss at work and still as their friend outside.
  6. by   jlwalker
    Originally posted by ClariceS:
    I found quite a change in the staff's perception of me since I took over the role about 2 months ago. They have been supportive because I was one of them and know how things are on this floor. But they really have begun to treat me like their boss. I am not included in the "information ring" we have on the floor anymore and some are certainly not as comfortable chatting at lunch like we used to. I have also been brought more of their concerns and woes because it affects their work.
    It wasn't such a huge shock this time. I had taken over staff development on this floor about 2 years ago which was viewed as an administrative step by the general staff. That is when a couple of "let's go for dinner after work" friendships were really affected.
    I still consider myself friendly with my staff but am not included in the general staff "hanging around together" like I used to be.

    I think some of that may need to happen so you won't be accused of doing favors for those you are closer friends with or find it hard to be the boss when you need to be for fear of ruining friendships. If you have long-standing friendships outside of work with those who will be your staff, hopefully they will remember that you need them to support and respect you as the boss at work and still as their friend outside.
    Thank you very much, ClariceS, for your response! Your experiences with advancement and leading your peers were pretty-much how I pictured it might be. It sounds like you have to be very strong and sure of yourself to accomplish this role change. I don't know if I could do it! I'm taking a class on Management, finishing my BS, and we needed to post a question on the topic, reading the responses over several weeks. Any other comments would be much appreciated!! Thanks again! Janel
  7. by   oncRN
    this has come up three times in my 15yr career. the first time, I had only been in nursing about two years, became the clinical leader on an inpatient unit...wide variety of personalities...some supportive, many jealous. Many clicks. wish I had some type of training to deal with those who just wanted to backstab...
    the next time was much better...was promoted in our outpt area, had been working with very dear friends, who were happy for me and wanted the best service...that's what we kept, friendships and excellent care...was tough at times to be the bad guy but all went well...then when merging of hospitals started..I was the first from my hospital to take over an area on the other campus. A few snide comments were made from a manager at my "home" hospital...but all staff were supportive. nurses eat their young (and old!)
  8. by   jlwalker
    Originally posted by oncRN:
    this has come up three times in my 15yr career. the first time, I had only been in nursing about two years, became the clinical leader on an inpatient unit...wide variety of personalities...some supportive, many jealous. Many clicks. wish I had some type of training to deal with those who just wanted to backstab...
    the next time was much better...was promoted in our outpt area, had been working with very dear friends, who were happy for me and wanted the best service...that's what we kept, friendships and excellent care...was tough at times to be the bad guy but all went well...then when merging of hospitals started..I was the first from my hospital to take over an area on the other campus. A few snide comments were made from a manager at my "home" hospital...but all staff were supportive. nurses eat their young (and old!)
    I just can't believe that we treat our colleagues this way! You're right about jealousy, cliques, and backstabbing---all are rampant in our profession. It sounds like your dear friends are mature, confident people, and I wish more nurses had those qualities. Many thanks for your comments!
  9. by   sclaunch
    It is very hard to lead your once peers.. if they are having a hard time letting go of the fact that they themselves did not get the position. New employees have greater respect since they were not in your "circle of friends". What I hate the most is the backstabbing and the underminding that goes on with nurses. If people could confront each other and not talk behind each others backs....this is a problem in our unit.
    Is anyone else's unit like this and how do you put a stop to it!!
  10. by   ebethmat
    You cannot do your job and expect everyone to like you all the time. "Once peers" have a skewed sense of entitlement about assignments, days off... Anything you have control over. When you counsel staff about behavior or perfomance, expect to see them brokering ill will towards you, in the halls. You have to rise above that. Take a Zanctac for your staff induced, stress induced gastritis and tell yourself that as long as you do the right thing... it's okay.

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