Sexist Comment by Unit Director

Nurses Relations

Published

at a recent unit staff meeting our new director, a lmsw, made the comment that he is proud that all the "guys" are willing to clean up "poopy diapers". i found this extremely offensive. we have one male rn and a couple male techs that do the same jobs as their female counterparts. i don't quite understand why the "guys" should be congratulated for doing a basic nursing task; it surely isn't beneath them because they are men. i told our director that being part of the nursing staff meant all patient care was fair game, male or female. he seemed surprised that i was offended, but honestly what planet is this guy from? :confused:

Specializes in ICU-CCRN, CVICU, SRNA.

You know what. This site is becoming very antagonistic. Anything you say-you get attacked. I for one am with OP. Its BS and totally sexist macho non-sense.

^I agree with the above. And the OP.

That's ********. If he is praising the dudes for something they are supposed to be doing then I want to be recognized for something I'm supposed to be doing too.

I hope he realized what he did wrong when you pointed it out. He is supposed to be a professional.

Some of you guys are way too sensitive.

Specializes in psych, addictions, hospice, education.

He's a guy who wouldn't want to do the work you do. He figured all guys feel the same as he does. It was a slip of the tongue that he should have kept to himself. It's good you told him how you feel because it might alter his attitude a bit.

I'd take it as a compliment and go on. Don't sweat the small stuff--there'll be bigger things to bug you sooner or later!

Specializes in ..

his past experience may be that some of the male workers 'slacked' when it came to these sorts of tasks. it may be that as a social worker he is not familiar with 'all things nursing' and assumed like many in the public that males are only there to give out meds and 'help move the heavy people.' either way, i think you are taking this way too seriously. would it have been better if he'd prefaced it with an "i know you all do a good job, but..."?

please don't show yourself to be easily offended, as it says much more about your state of maturity than that of the offender (not an attack, but advice). for the better part of 15+ years i have worked jobs where there were not only no other minorities of any kind in the office, but in that field anywhere (only met 4 of any kind over those years)! most of the time people really don't mean to be offensive. give them time and don't make a big deal out of every incident. if they do mean to be offensive, you simply make a target out of yourself. by being patient with people and giving them the benefit of the doubt, i have gained many friends who admit to being initially prejudiced. relax and let (or better yet help) the new "guy" do his job. stop looking for ways to be offended (and if you jumped on this one, this quickly, you were looking to be offended whether you know it or not). if he is sexist, it'll show soon enough and he'll give you some real ammo to sink his ship.

Specializes in CEN, CPEN, RN-BC.
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Wow, talk about over reacting. I simply told him in the meeting the men on our unit did the same amount of pt care as anyone else. I just thought it was kind of odd he would praise the men and not the women. To give a little back story, the unit I work on has not had steady management in four years. This guy is one of seven directors we have had, so I am a little wary. We have had a similar problem with our nurse manager, which we currently don't have. I am perfectly happy with my job, but it is very difficult working with no stability. On another note, many of you are quick to attack on a site I thought was for venting about nursing life in general. Chill out, because I certainly am chill as can be.

I agree with you OP. I think that falling into that complacency - oh it's just men being men - in the workplace can be a slippery slope. Guys are better at this, women better at that... I don't think there is necessarily harm in little details here and there (a smaller female nurse needing help with turning a large pt), but aren't we beyond sexist generalizations by now? I mean sure, some hubbies don't like to change dirty diapers. We aren't at home and our male coworkers aren't our hubbies.

I don't think that work is the place for sexist, racist, agist, etc... generalizations. Even if he didn't mean any harm and was just joking. It's off-putting to all of the women not getting a pat on the back for doing the same job.

I don't think I'd make a big deal about it. If it was something I heard a few times I'd speak to him. But maybe that is me just being a little too complacent about standing up for what is right.

stop looking for ways to be offended (and if you jumped on this one, this quickly, you were looking to be offended whether you know it or not).

this seems to fit the op to a t, at least on this thread. sorry, op, but it does seem as if you are looking for ways to be offended, from the seemingly innocuous comment that generated the thread to the way you are accusing people of attacking you for simply having different opinions from your own. i haven't seen anyone attack you, but only offer differing takes on the situation. you describe yourself as "chill", but that's not the vibe i'm getting. and believe me, i can be overly sensitive at times as well, but there's no need to dis the website as a whole simply because you didn't get the wholesale support you apparently were looking for. if you didn't notice, there were several people that did agree with you.

i think you handled it the right way by going directly to the source and telling him you were offended, but that maybe if your skin were a little tougher this whole situation could have been avoided.

Thank you everyone for your opinions. :)

I was at a gathering honoring a young female soldier who completed her flight school and had just qualified to pilot heliocopters. She was fuming because she had been singled out and recognized at the ceremony, being the only female in that class she assumed it was because she was female. She said, I am not a female pilot, I am a pilot, I didn't do anything any of the other pilots didn't do and I should not have been singled out. I think it is somewhat common to recognize people who are not in traditional roles without even recognizing it may be taken as sexist, racist, or other wise. Often it isn't meant to slight anyone as much as to recognize a departure from the norm, but it's really easy to see how one could feel slighted. Great place for a sounding board.

Specializes in Med/Surg, DSU, Ortho, Onc, Psych.

You are NOT nitpicking! Offensive/rude/sexit/racist comments have to stop in the work place. If we don't stand up to people who make them, it is our professions fault for letting these types of comments go.

In Oz we have to follow occ health and equal opportunity standards - as does everyone else in the work place. I presume u have them as well.

Tell him he has breached these, and why ur annoyed. Tell your NUM - or whoever ur HR/unit head is, and tell him you will complain next time.

If it was directed towards the guys, then it is a sexist comment.

And if it happened to any others on here, I'm sure they would too be offended as well not to be included, despite what they say on here.

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