Nurse Mobbing/bullying - page 10

:balloons: I am new to the forum and would like to get feedback from others who have experienced mobbing/bullying/harassment in the healthcare field. Please share so others might learn more about... Read More

  1. by   HarryPotter
    Dear Librarian: I think your question is a good one and one to really think about. Since your a librarian, perhaps you could do some research for us. I know from many posts that men do not, in general, be door-mats. When men have responded to the bully/victim relationship, they have said that when they feel someone is trying to bully them, they mince no words and tell the person, straight out and right away to back off.
    When men have responded to a "victim", they are often quite amazed that anyone would put up with a bully. They also are very straight forward in how they have delt with it. Pretty much by pushing back and setting limits and not putting up with it for a minute.
    Does the difference between men and women have to do with some innate characteristic? Does it have to do with testosterone? Does it have to do with sports and competitiveness like football?
    I'd love to hear what some of the men have to say about this question.
  2. by   HM2VikingRN
    I was mobbed and bullied by a psychological services director for over 2 1/2 years. I ended up with a diagnosis of reactive depression as a result of this supervisors behavior. After filing numerous complaints and grievances I was finally offered a demotion just to get away from this very evil person. This was female to male bullying. My best advice is to read up on the violence in the workplace policy and file complaints with your HR manager.
  3. by   HM2VikingRN
    I think that this needs to be a Sticky!
  4. by   HM2VikingRN
    Quote from lifeisbeautiful
    it all comes down to self-esteem, integrity and respect. Rude, snooty nurses have none of these.
    Very well put! It also applies to psychologists.
  5. by   HM2VikingRN
    Quote from spacenurse
    That is so.
    Usually nurses volunteering to represent their colleagues do a great job.
    Sometimes not.
    I would hope the union employee labor representative would educate her.

    In CNA our nurse representatives are elected. They can be unelected too.
    At steward training it was drummed into our heads to NEVER CONTACT A MANAGER ON BEHALF OF A MEMBER UNLESS THAT MEMBER ASKS YOU TO MAKE A CONTACT.
  6. by   JessicRN
    Guess my union steward did not take a class. :angryfire
  7. by   barray
    The one nurse that has been the rudest to me is a member of my mother's church. When I am scheduled to work with her, I do my work, and do my best not to have to work with her. Sad testimony of her faith.
  8. by   NurseyTee
    Oh my goodness! This thread was just what I needed today after working all night being "bullied and mobbed". Here is what happened to me this week. We've been hiring lots of new nurses and as usual we got a new one about a month ago that started on my shift for orienting. So, I showed her where things were and she took a cart. I took the halls with the most residents and only gave her 12 res. to pass meds and do tx's for. Well... I was trying to show her around and also make calls to the Doc.. etc while also doing my med pass in between. Well, after an hour or two into our shift she asks me if our DON is still on the site, I told her that I thought she was. The next thing I know the DON is down on my floor and in my face about why my med pass isn't done. This had never ever happened before. (I'm new to LTC and still trying to get the hang of it all.) I figured out that Miss Nurse newbie had called the DON and said something to her about my med pass. Why on earth she would do this, I have no idea. Well, since that day she has not let up on me. She is now the DON's golden girl and has been filling her ears with lies about my work. For instance, she came on shift late the other night to relieve me. She arrived an hour early and sat and talked with the other nurse that is her buddy. She never asked for me to give her report or to count off the narcs, she just went along talking and leaving for smoke breaks with her buddy. About an 1.5 hrs later, I was looking for them again and they weren't on the floor so I decided to go take a break since I had been there for 14 hours and hadn't had a lunch and only one other break. When I did, she called the DON at home at 4 am!! to tell her that I had left the building and didn't give her report or count off the narcs. When I came back up she acted like nothing had happened but her buddy read me the riot act for not giving her report immediately. (This was not a normal shift change time, by the way, where report is being given by all) I said to them, why didn't you ask me? I wouldn't have had a problem with giving the cart over to you when you got in. They didn't want that, they wanted to cause trouble. They also told the DON that I hadn't done a very critical dsg change, that I did do. A total lie!! I've also had some issues with the computer charting that I was never oriented on myself. I've emailed and called the DON to let her know I need help with it, but when I went to talk to her about all these issues, she just looked at me with disgust and said that I should just do it. She also wanted me to do an admission on two new residents and I have NO CLUE how to do it. I told her this, and she said it was unacceptable and that she couldn't make me a good nurse, either I was one or I wasn't, and obviously I wasn't. That TORE MY HEART OUT. I cried for most of the night. I have wanted to be a nurse since I was 3 years old, my parents died when I was little and they both knew I wanted to be a nurse. I finally accomplished my goal after leaving a domestically violent relationship and moving to another state with my 4 kids. Now being daily harrassed by these evil persons disturbs me to my core. I just do not understand why anyone would do this to another human being. I really don't know how to handle it. I love my job there, but this is just unbearable. I come home crying every time I work.
  9. by   buildingmyfaith57
    i don't know if the form means anything or any more but i see alot favortism here. and you tell me that its not in your work place.
  10. by   JessicRN
    I feel for you especially since I have been there. I know from experience,once you have been deemed unliked by one nurse they will grow to all nurses then all aids. Your supervisor no matter what the truth is will deem you as the problem and you will be the one fired. My suggestion get out now before you are fired you do not need a reference from any job you are currently working at when applying to a new job
  11. by   chadash
    There is a lot of strange behavoir in the work place going on, I even had fellow workers "undo" work I had done, messed up rooms and the like. You just scratch your head, and clean it up.
    It is clear when you did all you could to help her, and then she turned on you at the start, this is probably a pattern for her. This is how some people function in the workplace. It is "mean girls" on the playground, but it isn't funny in the adult world. Apparently she sees you as a target ( are you concientious and helpful? cannon fodder) and putting someone in the work place in a bad light is the way she finds significance. Past employers are probably afraid of her. Where as some one like you, they know you are too good to do any harm, so they do not hesitate to rake you over the coals.
  12. by   NurseyTee
    When I worked last week, we had a re-admission come in via transport ambulance. The am. guys brought the res. into her room and helped me get her into bed, we covered her with the bed sheet and the bed cover. I then went to an aide and asked her to get her a warmer blanket to cover her with and put her bagged items away. I signed the paperwork for the amb. men and then set out to get her admission underway by someone who knew what to do (I've never done an admission.) After a few more incidents that day by the bullies, I went to my DON and she confronted me about that re-admit res. She said she found her in her room without any covers on her what-so-ever, and her stuff all over the floor. I was flabbergasted and tried to argue my point with her that I had NOT left the res. cold and uncovered, but she didn't believe me. I think the one bully went in there and took her blankets off of her. ???? I can't figure it out, that is the only conclusion I can come to because when I left the room she was covered by a sheet and the bed cover too. The DON said there were no covers at all in the room. Everything had been removed. I really feel sabotaged and how do I protect myself against attacks like that????????? I can't be everywhere constantly. I'm worried about my licensure coming under attack. Who knows what these two are capable of? :angryfire
  13. by   HM2VikingRN
    Quote from HHC_LPN
    When I worked last week, we had a re-admission come in via transport ambulance. The am. guys brought the res. into her room and helped me get her into bed, we covered her with the bed sheet and the bed cover. I then went to an aide and asked her to get her a warmer blanket to cover her with and put her bagged items away. I signed the paperwork for the amb. men and then set out to get her admission underway by someone who knew what to do (I've never done an admission.) After a few more incidents that day by the bullies, I went to my DON and she confronted me about that re-admit res. She said she found her in her room without any covers on her what-so-ever, and her stuff all over the floor. I was flabbergasted and tried to argue my point with her that I had NOT left the res. cold and uncovered, but she didn't believe me. I think the one bully went in there and took her blankets off of her. ???? I can't figure it out, that is the only conclusion I can come to because when I left the room she was covered by a sheet and the bed cover too. The DON said there were no covers at all in the room. Everything had been removed. I really feel sabotaged and how do I protect myself against attacks like that????????? I can't be everywhere constantly. I'm worried about my licensure coming under attack. Who knows what these two are capable of? :angryfire
    I think you are being deliberately undermined by these two. I got caught in a similar triangle at my former job. I can see the undermining and backstabbing going on that I endured for over 2 years. Start keeping a daily diary of all interactions with your supervisor and these 2 w***ch*S (witnesses if possible). After 2 weeks do the following.

    I would make an appointment with the HR manager. Inform them of the kinds of behaviors that the 3 are using towards you. Give a copy (not the original) to the manager. Put management on notice that you believe this is the basis of a hostile work environment. Let them know that you are considering seeking advice from outside agencies. (While you are doing this start job hunting. Unfortunately, the data on bullying shows that the victims are forced out about 70% of the time.)

    I would also consult with an employment attorney.

    Best of luck but I think you should do everything possible to get away from this situation.

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