My God, these family members!!

Nurses Relations

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They are just killing me. Why is it that so many of them feel so entitled to sit in their aging parents rooms and just boss us nurses to HELL and back, while they sit there, fully able to do much of what we're doing for their parent, but simply do NOT have the time to do when we have other patients and issues to deal with. i MEAN -- can't they get mom up at least perhaps ONCE during the day? Does it have to be a nurse doing it every single time, ten times a day??

I just came off a shift tonight where I literally waitressed all day long, making and fetching coffee and water and 100 millions cups of juice for these patients (because we're always short a tech) -- and a patient's daughter was literally screaming at nurses at change of shift to come in and do something or other for her mother. It was absolutely NOT an emergency. (She was actually screaming -- "Good thing it WASN'T an emergency!!" These people have been on our unit for over 2-3 weeks, running every nurse on the unit ragged. Their mother is far over 80 years old and is only going to head to weeks of rehab after being on our unit. They want a private nurse -- that is what they want and need. But they can't get that on a floor. I think their call light was on for perhaps five minutes, max.

I am just SO tired of family members not understanding what we do -- and our managers from the floor to the corporate headquarters not backing us up to explain it to them. We are simply to treat everyone as our "family members" and go above and beyond 1000 percent of the time. Who goes above and beyond FOR NURSES??? DOES ANYONE???

We have no private space to do our charting, we are like fish in a bowl for these family members. If they see you at the nursing station -- that's it. They are ON YOU like flies. If they don't have a reason to bug you, they will find one. So, you don't get your charting done on time and are left to stay after a shift for an hour.

I am just so tired of it. So burnt out. Is it any wonder why they can't keep nurses for long? I mean -- come on, management -- take a LOOK at what you are doing to nurses nowadays. Put some LIMITS, please, on these family members. It is OUT OF CONTROL. :madface:

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
why is it you have to 'squeeze' around them?

in australia, in this situation.... i would ask them to stay out until i had sorted the p't.

i would approach this by saying something like ' just let me sort out dad....i 'll get all the admission stuff done at once .....meanwhile pls help yourself to coffee and a comfortable chair over there....i'll call you when i'm done and then you can can in and spend some quality time with dad with fewer interruptions'

wondering if i would be fired if i worked in the us :eek:

you'd get "customer service" complaints and poor press-gainey scores. and then your manager would have to talk to you about making the families happy.

Specializes in Med/Surg, DSU, Ortho, Onc, Psych.

What about the patient's relatives that approach you for some paracetamol or other drugs, because they have a headache/pain, whatever. It cracks me up that they think we will go: 'Yeah sure you can have drugs from us! We don't know you from a bar of soap, don't know if you have any allergies, or (surprise surprise) you could be a drug seeker!' One guy got very belligerent when I explained patiently, legally etc we can't give out drugs, he would have to go DOWNSTAIRS to the pharmacy/chemist to get what he needed. He really couldn't see any problem with me giving him drugs on the ward, cos his family member was in there. Oh and he said it was too far to go to the chemist (the chemist was like a 5 minute walk to get to) cos his headache was 'too bad' - he was standing on his own two feet, talking away to me - how bad could it be? I ended up saying no I can't help you, and just walked away.

They will try it on to get free drugs won't they!

Specializes in CVICU, Obs/Gyn, Derm, NICU.
What about the patient's relatives that approach you for some paracetamol or other drugs, because they have a headache/pain, whatever. It cracks me up that they think we will go: 'Yeah sure you can have drugs from us! We don't know you from a bar of soap, don't know if you have any allergies, or (surprise surprise) you could be a drug seeker!' One guy got very belligerent when I explained patiently, legally etc we can't give out drugs, he would have to go DOWNSTAIRS to the pharmacy/chemist to get what he needed. He really couldn't see any problem with me giving him drugs on the ward, cos his family member was in there. Oh and he said it was too far to go to the chemist (the chemist was like a 5 minute walk to get to) cos his headache was 'too bad' - he was standing on his own two feet, talking away to me - how bad could it be? I ended up saying no I can't help you, and just walked away.

They will try it on to get free drugs won't they!

Like I always say ....thank goodness I work in an Aussie ED

Specializes in CVICU, Obs/Gyn, Derm, NICU.
you'd get "customer service" complaints and poor press-gainey scores. and then your manager would have to talk to you about making the families happy.

oh i get it now....the families are expecting the same type of service one would expect from a hotel or restaurant :uhoh3:

Specializes in CVICU, Obs/Gyn, Derm, NICU.
It's not a matter of basic human needs, it's a matter of infection control regulations.

So, when a manager tosses out your drink when it's not located in a break room, it's not a matter of that manager being a PITA, it's a matter of following reguations.

Carry on.....

What if the nurses don't get to use their break room? Why should they go without fluids?

I would suffer health issues if not allowed my capped water bottle at the work station.

They are adults doing an important job who are entitled to be treated well.

They are not servants or small children.

Bet my bottom dollar the manager doesn't go without fluids. The manager needs to learn how to BOTH accommodate her/his staff and

satisfy regulations

Come on down :)

Got jobs for experienced nurses and we love Americans ....especially Texans ....don't quite know why that is ? Probably because we are similar culture-wise

how is the pay is aussie

Specializes in CVICU, Obs/Gyn, Derm, NICU.
how is the pay is aussie

Pretty good ....compares favourably with the US. Experienced staff nurse earns $35 - 38 /hr day shift Mon-Frid. Each state is a little different.

We have higher differentials and more vacation than the US. The higher differentials mean weekend and night nurses can earn considerably more than that.

But taxation is higher than you are probably used to. And cost of living is more than most areas of the US.

All in all ...not a bad pay though

How about the family members take care of their mother or father instead of dumping them off at a hospital so they don't have to care for them at home and ruining their blessed summer vacation! Ugh!

These make me crazy too! Families who absolutely insist that Mom/Dad/Grandma/Grandpa get admitted because "something" is wrong. ER doctor finally agrees to a 24 hour obs and when we go to discharge, find the family has gone on vacation!

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
oh i get it now....the families are expecting the same type of service one would expect from a hotel or restaurant :uhoh3:

a fine hotel or restaurant, and i'm not sure even then they'd be happy. what restaurant is going to toilet your mother for you? (not your mother the patient; your mother the visitor.)

Specializes in Gerontological Nursing, Acute Rehab.
What if the nurses don't get to use their break room? Why should they go without fluids?

I would suffer health issues if not allowed my capped water bottle at the work station.

They are adults doing an important job who are entitled to be treated well.

They are not servants or small children.

Bet my bottom dollar the manager doesn't go without fluids. The manager needs to learn how to BOTH accommodate her/his staff and

satisfy regulations

Hey, don't shoot the messenger please! :) I'm just telling you what the regulations state. And, if your nurses station has a sharps container in it, it's considered a "dirty" area and food and drink are simply not allowed. It has nothing to do with being treated like a child or servant, it's the law.

The manager doesn't go without fluids because his/her office is not considered a "dirty" area. I work as an Employee Health Nurse, and I had to move my sharps container to the bathroom in order for me to have a drink at my desk. Once again, following regulations.

And no, the manager only has to follow regulations. They don't have to accomodate anyone if it means compromising regulations and getting citations.

Like I said, I understand. I worked the floor for over 15 years. And yes, I had a drink with me, and got busted a few times, too. But it really irks me when people act like it's the managers being "mean", or nurses are being treated like "servants", when it's really a matter of following regs so the facility doesn't get fined which may result in the employees not getting raises.

'nuff said.....

Hey, don't shoot the messenger please! :) I'm just telling you what the regulations state. And, if your nurses station has a sharps container in it, it's considered a "dirty" area and food and drink are simply not allowed. It has nothing to do with being treated like a child or servant, it's the law.

The manager doesn't go without fluids because his/her office is not considered a "dirty" area. I work as an Employee Health Nurse, and I had to move my sharps container to the bathroom in order for me to have a drink at my desk. Once again, following regulations.

And no, the manager only has to follow regulations. They don't have to accomodate anyone if it means compromising regulations and getting citations.

Like I said, I understand. I worked the floor for over 15 years. And yes, I had a drink with me, and got busted a few times, too. But it really irks me when people act like it's the managers being "mean", or nurses are being treated like "servants", when it's really a matter of following regs so the facility doesn't get fined which may result in the employees not getting raises.

'nuff said.....

indeed it is OSHA...however are there not exceptions for covered containers?

Specializes in Psych, EMS.

I hear ya! I remember when I worked in Med/Surg I was about to walk one elderly pt to the bathroom, and asked her family if one of them could walk behind us with the iv pole. They all just looked at me with their eyebrows raised. Unfortunately this was not an isolated incident but typical of many (not all) family members and visitors. Family members that refuse to empty urinals and bedpans irk me too, one pt's son told me that it grossed him out too much. I told him, "yeah, it doesn't do much for me either." :down:

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