My God, these family members!! - page 10

by SoundofMusic 51,352 Views | 235 Comments

They are just killing me. Why is it that so many of them feel so entitled to sit in their aging parents rooms and just boss us nurses to HELL and back, while they sit there, fully able to do much of what we're doing for their... Read More


  1. 7
    Nothing is going to change unless facilities become more supportive of nurses! Families are only following the lead of the hospital. The "customer service" people that drop off those surveys and chat with the patients (then return to their cute little office after having a nice lunch) have no clue! We need experienced floor nurses in those roles - someone who can advocate for us!
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    hang in there.Nursing,as in any service position, is something that must be tweeked to fit. That is to individualize the care and treatment of each and every person you interact with. Get creative. Use some humor,stories to explain whatever it is your involved with. Have fun. sometimes even get a little "BLUE". it all can be great. Don't let it get to you. Build a defense wall against the things that get under your skin,not just micro-bugs. you'll live to practice another year. Beware of the dreaded BURN-OUT. it really sucks.
    Last edit by RandeeN on Apr 23, '09
    Hoozdo and lindarn like this.
  3. 2
    If only they put up "Golden Rule" signs- Do unto others as you would have them do unto you-
    very large and pretty- better homes and gardens style- something people would notice....
    but of course that would probably backfire too...
    lindarn and mochabean like this.
  4. 3
    My God ...My God... I always say that. My friends you expressed my feelings... what a terrible situation.. Now i know I am not only the person who felt this waitress posting. management is so bad to handle this situation .. they just want to make us work hard to glorify their hospital status.. hospital want patients.. nurses can be terminated on the spot in this low economy position ..nurses should be very careful doing customer service..is there any changes gonna happen .. i don't think so. nobody there to support us. management watching for mistakes to question the nurse.what a terrible situation. we can do one thing..lets share , and share and again share our feelings ...
    JacknSweetpea, dhinson45, and lindarn like this.
  5. 14
    Quote from errosmith
    We have a spot in the chart for psych/soc aspects of the patient with dropdown boxes such as "demanding", "combative", "hostile", "withdrawn".

    As a patient and a health care worker, such documentation covers everyones bottom. However, this documentation punishes the patient and labels them as a "problem patient". Patients can be difficult for many reasons and that often is not taken into account...........

    I have had to go the the hospital (ER) three times in the past few months and I will say that I dread it. I feel that nursing staff can't wait to tell me how much they are being put out by my being there. I hate that with the economy or staff stress they are taking it out on the patient. We have no choice
    I'm only responding because you quoted me. First, I'd like to say that I'm sorry you recieved such $#i**y care when you were hospitalized, but your description is not representative of the type of care you would have received in my facility or under my care. Second, if you are sick enough to be in the hospital, then you are sick enough to be woken up in the middle of the night for lab draws and vital signs. Third, I was not referring to a person being cranky because they're receiving poor care. I was referring to people who, despite receiving excellent care, nevertheless are not behaving in a way that can be considered "Within Normal Limits", even taking into account that they are ill, not at their best, probably have not slept well due to being woken up for vitals and lab draws, etc. Speaking for myself, I do not document someone as "combative", for example, if they are cross with me simply because they are tired and hurting. To me, someone who is ***** because they're in the hospital is WNL. It is to be expected that a person might not behave very nicely when they are sleep deprived and sick. This is why I do things like cluster my care so that I'm not disturbing them a zillion times during my shift, when I can do several things in one visit, leaving them to rest undisturbed for longer periods. This is why I work so hard to make sure their pain is under control, they are warm enough, they have had enough to eat and drink, and have had an opportunity to void, poop, clean up, etc. It's called "Nursing". Please do not use my words as an example of poor quality care. This is not the subject of this thread. :angryfire

    I know I'm not very eloquent right now. It just ticks me off when I work my tail off to make my patients and their family members happy, when I *know* that people in the hospital aren't going to be at their best (a big fat DUH!!!!) and have my words used in such a way. It's insulting. I am a damn good nurse, and I know the difference between a sick person who is reacting in a totally reasonable way, and someone who is being unreasonable in their expectations.
    Last edit by Virgo_RN on Apr 24, '09
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    Quote from southernbeegirl
    It KILLS me when a family member comes to the desk asking for the nurse of their loved one and when told that nurse is at lunch they get angry and pitch a fit. i couldnt help myself one day and said "did you eat lunch today? it's 2pm and she is just now eating hers so NO i wont call her to come back to the floor. she'll be back in 30 minutes" (it was NOT an emergency..was something stoopid i cant remember now)
    We are not allowed to say the nurse is "at lunch". Per management. The scripted line we are to say is..."your nurse is currently unavailable at this moment, what may I assist you with." Apparently the family's and pt's aren't allowed to know that the nurses can take breaks.
  7. 1
    It makes me wonder how these people are to waiters; nevermind if they treat a NURSE that way who is taking care of their loved one. Scary!
    dhinson45 likes this.
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    know I'm not very eloquent right now. It just ticks me off when I work my tail off to make my patients and their family members happy, when I *know* that people in the hospital aren't going to be at their best (a big fat DUH!!!!) and have my words used in such a way. It's insulting. I am a damn good nurse, and I know the difference between a sick person who is reacting in a totally reasonable way, and someone who is being unreasonable in their expectations.
    You are absolutely eloquent! BRAVO TO YOU for expressing exactly what I'm getting at. As a nurse, I absolutely BUST IT for these people. I am not sitting at the nurses's station filing my nails. I'm running my TAIL off!! I'm doing everything I can do, physically, mentally, entirely -- and it's still not enough. They are NOT behaving this way because they're not being cared for properly.They are doing it because they think they're entitled to something that goes beyond what a nurse can reasonably do in a 12 hr shift. They want hospitality service, on top of good, friendly, respectful clinical care. I'm sorry -- THIS is what has go to GO.

    But will it ever? Has it ever, in so many years? Will it get worse before it gets better? I sure hope not, because I can't deal with it much longer, as the "provider" of this "product." Either I'm going to lose my license over some grave error I made while catering to obtain customer satifaction levels, OR, I'm going to drop dead. As a person who respects and cares for myself first, will not let either one of these occur, so I may just have to leave nursing at some point.

    I will continue to believe that the institution of "customer service" into healthcare has done a great disservice to patients. It puts them at risk and denigrates our health care system more as time goes on.
  9. 6
    Quote from sebie0218
    My God ...My God... I always say that. My friends you expressed my feelings... what a terrible situation.. Now i know I am not only the person who felt this waitress posting. management is so bad to handle this situation .. they just want to make us work hard to glorify their hospital status.. hospital want patients.. nurses can be terminated on the spot in this low economy position ..nurses should be very careful doing customer service..is there any changes gonna happen .. i don't think so. nobody there to support us. management watching for mistakes to question the nurse.what a terrible situation. we can do one thing..lets share , and share and again share our feelings ...
    You can UNIONIZE, UNIONIZE, UNIONIZE!!!
    JMHO and my NY $0.02.

    Lindarn, RN, BSN, CCRN
    Spokane, Washington
  10. 3
    Unfortunately, I had to retire from nursing, and am now permanently disabled due to the 2 knee surg's, and repetative back inj's! Was depressed for a while to no longer be working at a job I loved doing, but finally accepted that fact! I too got to see what it was like to be a bed pt!All the body mechanics in the world couldn't of helped me the last back inj!. Psych pt in Isolation became afraid he was going to be dropped as an orderly & I assisted him from bedside chair to his bed! Due to 2-IVs,a TPN,I-vac machine and a indwelling cath, and trying to avoid all that; as we slid him into bed he wouldn't let go of me and half pulled me into the bed with him; thus jerking my back & injuring disc! That left me a pt in hosp, flat on my back, in Tx I was unable to even get out of bed without someone there to assist me! look and sent me back to the Surg that had done that surg, and further investigation showed lots of torn up cartledge that was removed with a 2nd surg!Moral of that all is "If you got painbetter c/o it approp to the Dr!Hope in sharing this it will help others not to have to go where I have goneTo those of you working cudos, and keep on truckingGood nurses are needed more than ever today Leenie.
    sevensonnets, dhinson45, and lindarn like this.


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