Do you have friends and family that don't understand your nursing career?

[Hellostudentnurssee]

My boyfriend is an engineer and I feel like he doesn't understand the nursing world-being a nursing student or being a nurse (in general). I grew up in the world of nursing since I was born. My mom has been and is currently an ICU nurse for 30 years. His mom and sister are also both in the healthcare field as techs. I'm not undermining their jobs but its annoying bc he talks about them as if they're martyrs and how they are so smart and knowledgable. Every time I see then, they're always telling me "physiological" knowledge and how "my patient this and that". I'm thinking, "that's great. I respect you and your job but (to put it bluntly, you use a machine, see the patient for 10 minutes and write in their chart. You don't spend an 8 hour shift with them doing assessments, giving them meds, discussing changes with the doctor or pharmacy to clarify, taking with their family, or spending long hours charting. How dare you say, 'my patient this and that' and how dare you use it as your way to get attention with a group of people by telling stories and giving out all that information! What about HIPPA?!" Usually I grin a bear it with his mom and sister but I find it annoying that he sees me as this "cute little nurse with a cute little job." It's disrespectful to the nurses who work their ass off everyday in whatever setting they're in;it's a stressful job. I've educated him, even showed him my old nursing assessments, reports, papers from school but it frustrates me that he doesn't get it, yet he views his family members as "sooo smart". I'm know they are and I respect it but nurses are smart, hard working, and you not undermine them. Sorry for venting. I know you all understand and was just needing support....

[TakeTwoAspirin, MSN, RN, APRN]

This whole situation sounds really toxic to me and I feel bad that you feel you have to tolerate such poor behavior on their part.

[blondy2061h, MSN, RN]

I like it when the techs also see the patients as their patients. Generally, those are the techs that give better care. If they aren't giving away identifying information, just telling general stories, they're not violating HIPAA.

[RNperdiem, RN]

Your boyfriend seems to respect his mother and his sister. This is a good thing.

I know you are venting, but it seems important to you for your boyfriend to believe that your job is greater than theirs. How come?

[xoemmylouox, ASN, RN]

Eh.. Focus on school, and understand we all have a role as part of the healthcare team. I don't think anyone is more important than another.

[plinytheRN]

I find that the public does not have a clear idea of what a nurse does and I also get frustrated. This is due to many reasons, nursing is a field evolving quickly, our responsibilities have changed, the media plays a role (Grey's Anatomy... doctors never do all that stuff!!) On one occasion, I was explaining a pt's referred shoulder pain in relation to the gallbladder to a family member. I overheard that family member explain to the others what I had said starting with "that the doctor told the nurse that"... she assumed the doctor told me about this information, not that I was educated on this topic in school. The older generation of people don't realize how much education we get in school theses days. Patients also don't get the roles in general, as far as aides, nurses and doctors.

[Jayblade0]

Sometimes techs spend more time with pts than nurses. Their job is as important as your. Without them, your job would be damm hard.

[KATRN78]

I encountered this a lot. For some people they will always see you from their limited perspective. This does not mean they think lowly of you, it means they have "tunnel vision" so to speak.

Try not to take it personally. I know its hard when you feel spoken down to. I might respond to the tech-family members with "Of course, that's first semester nursing school stuff, did you ever want to expand your career and become a nurse?"

[DemonWings]

Sounds as though you feel like you need to prove something. My best advise would be to ignore their behavior. What exactly are you trying to educate your boyfriend about? I would tread lightly because trying to convince him that you are smarter than his mother may come back to bite you. No one can make you feel inferior without your consent:)

[TakeTwoAspirin, MSN, RN, APRN]

I'm not saying that he shouldn't be supportive of his mom and sister. Everyone is correct, techs do a great job and are an integral part of the team (heck, I was one myself). However, I do object to that support when it is used as a weapon against someone else and it seems to me that it is being used as a power trip to the detriment of the OP. It's not about one being better or smarter/better than the other. It's about respecting everyone's unique role in patient care.