In my experience there are 3 kinds of difficult families:
1.) the kind that feel they are not being heard (Mostly these people just want to be listened to and their concerns adressed, I listen quietly and answer what i can and get answers for those i cant. It is unfortunate , but sometimes families are not being listened to and thier concerns are treated as not important)
2.) the kind that have guilt about placing them in a long term care home or guilty about not being able to care for them due to caregivers fatigue, busy schedule,etc. (whether justifiable or not) they feel that if they yell and complain it shows they care and makes them feel like they are doing something.
3.) the kind that just dont know what they are talking about and think that they do. they like to complain and there is nothing you can ever do to satisfy them. it is best to just muttle through and be professional , give the best care you can (as usual) , and let it go when your prayers are answered and they are discharged lol.
each one of these are still family members and deserve to have their concerns addressed, but not at the expense of your other patients. I would also inform the family that the pt requested pain medicine and although you understand their concerns, HE is the pt and if he requests pain medicine and it is not harmful to him and he is competent then it will be given to him. if they would like for him not receive it, then they should speak to him about not requesting it. sometimes you have to be an advocate for your pt even with family members. if they want him in pain , then too bad! (dont tell them that , though lol).
i hope you are able to let it go and know that you did exactly what you should have.