Confront or do a slow burn!

Nurses Relations

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Asking for advice. I am an RN and work in a local hospital. The other day I was talking to our head nurse on the phone. A co-worker was nearby and asked if it was the head nurse and then asked for the phone after I was done. I handed it to her but stayed in my chair to finish my charting. I overheard the whole conversation. The head nurse asked a few mundane things and then asked if anyone had lay down for their break. My coworker responded yes and then added but not who you think. The head nurse asked who and my coworker responded that she was working the floor with A and that I was in the nursery with D. She emphasized the D. As you can guess, D had in fact laid down for her break.

Now, the co-worker is a staff RN and is even a union rep for our hospital. I am not a person who is comfortable with confrontation but I wished I had said something immediately. I work with this nurse quite often. I am upset because:

I wish I had said something immediately

The head nurse actually asked a staff nurse to supply information in a sneaky way

The staff nurse supplied the information

This came from a union rep

I think that I should tell the staff nurse that I overheard every word and how sad and disappointed I am. I am quite used to this staff nurse being bossy and acting superior. I just don't know if I can comfortably work with her knowing she is playing both sides of the fence, pretending she is a union rep but actually being a tell all to management. I want her to know that all of the rumors circulating about her being our embedded spy suddenly became true to me after I heard her!

Specializes in Nursing Management.

I would just kiss her *** no point in getting on her bad side. It would be bad for business.

Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.

This is what drives me nuts about so many healthcare settings. Spies? Tattling? Rumors? What is this, junior high school?

No! It's a workplace, for crying out loud, and the nurses should be taking care of patients and minding their own danged business instead of behaving like children. We will never be taken seriously as professionals until we start treating each other in a professional manner; the ratting each other out, bossing co-workers around, spying, and playing both "sides" needs to STOP. There aren't supposed to be any "sides", we are all there to take care of the people entrusted to us.

OP, you need to let it go and regard your co-workers as exactly that---not rivals. Even if they're being immature and petty, don't get bogged down in their drama. Remember: "Not my circus.....not my monkeys".

Specializes in Emergency Room, Trauma ICU.

I don't see how it's "playing both sides". If my manager asked me if I saw someone napping I would give an honest answer. Was your coworker supposed to lie to cover for someone? This is why I try to not get involved with these type of things, but when asked I will be 100% truthful.

I completely agree with the phrase Not my circus, not my monkeys, not my problem. I also believe in being truthful. However, it is very uncomfortable working with someone that is more than happy to text the manager or tattle on her coworkers. Caring for our patients is priority but nobody likes to be thrown under the bus!

Specializes in Emergency Room, Trauma ICU.
I completely agree with the phrase Not my circus, not my monkeys, not my problem. I also believe in being truthful. However, it is very uncomfortable working with someone that is more than happy to text the manager or tattle on her coworkers. Caring for our patients is priority but nobody likes to be thrown under the bus!

It's one thing to have a coworker who runs to management to tattle. No one likes that. But it seems in the OP that the manager asked and coworker answered. Completely different scenario in my opinion. It would be nice if we could focus on work, but we're humans and that just ain't gonna happen!

Specializes in Acute Care, Rehab, Palliative.

She was asked a question and she answered truthfully. Being a union rep doesn't mean you are expected to lie. What was the point anyways. She she lay down on her break.What's the big deal?

I couldn't make head nor tails of the OP. could someone enlighten me?

Specializes in Neuroscience.

eh, butt out.

I completely agree with the phrase Not my circus, not my monkeys, not my problem. I also believe in being truthful. However, it is very uncomfortable working with someone that is more than happy to text the manager or tattle on her coworkers. Caring for our patients is priority but nobody likes to be thrown under the bus!

I wouldn't say "tattling". The charge nurse asked a question, and the nurse answered it. If the charge had asked you, what would you have said?

It is on the nurse who asked the question to begin with. If she is so concerned of the behavior of the nurses under her charge, then she needs to pop in and see for herself. If an UNPAID break period means that no one can lay down should they choose to, then it really is not a break. If there is some sort of policy that says one can not lay down when they are on their unpaid break, and a nurse does knowing that this is the policy, it is on them. If nurses are laying down for a good portion of the shift, I am not sure why anyone would tolerate it. They need to go home if they are not feeling well, otherwise, the other nurses are taking on more work while someone is paid to sleep.

Do not listen in on conversations that do not pertain to you. Do not get yourself embroiled in the he said/she said/I know stuff. As a union rep, there may be things happening of which you are not aware, meaning perhaps management has approached the union about nurses sleeping on nights--you just don't know. And unless you actually HEARD each and every word in context through the phone you really don't know what the heck they were talking about. If you are charge at any point, you can certainly say "be careful if you are attempting to lay down during break--we are moving away from that practice" or something similar. Otherwise, not your fish to fry.

There's being truthful, then there's being a pot stirrer. Put down the spoon, continue your commitment to great patient care, and stay out of the fray.

Stay clear of the trouble makers!! You don't want to be in the middle of some confrontation. Unless there is a policy that a staff cannot lay down on their break then there really should not be any issue. Is the person laying down on an empty pt bed? That could be an infection control issue, if she/he is laying down in the break room, it really should not matter as long as they are not abusing their break and getting a longer break etc. It is like smokers are always getting their breaks no matter what is going on. Where ever I have worked the only guaranteed break was the meal break, and you all know how sometimes that does not even happen. If it is an unpaid break, that is their own time to do what they want, and if they can get in a 10-15 minute nap, more power to them!! Don't sweat the small stuff and don't get caught up in the petty, juvenile attitude of some co-workers. There are brown-nosers no matter where you work. (Brown noser is someone who has their nose up the leader's butt because they are trying to stay "close" to them for privileges/special treatment)

I would just make a mental note that the union rep/tattler is not to be trusted, and leave it at that.

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