Are married women bullied less at work? - page 4

Are women who are married less likely to be bullied than a single woman with no kids??... Read More

  1. by   EmilyEmily
    Quote from meanmaryjean
    I would call it 'Your co-worker is a thoughtless jerk with no filter between his/her brain and mouth.' She's probably said similarly thoughtless things to your co-workers. I fail to see how it is bullying.
    You're gas lighting. She was bullying me.
  2. by   ixchel
    Quote from EmilyEmily
    You're gas lighting. She was bullying me.
    I disagree completely. Bullying is a repeated act directed toward a person with the intention of inflicting physical or emotional harm and exert status over the person being bullied. It is repeated, and it is behavior that escalates over time. It leaves the victim feeling terror over the idea that they have to return to the scene of the repeated acts, whether it be school or work.

    This is what I meant by my first post in this thread. People do not know the meaning of bullying. An insensitive person made a rude comment. Rudeness is not bullying.

    Be careful how the "bullying" misnomer can label you. A person who is bullied is a victim. You have not been victimized and this person who made this comment has not exerted power over you. Don't fall into a victim role by believing this is bullying. Don't relinquish your power.
  3. by   EmilyEmily
    Quote from ixchel
    I disagree completely. Bullying is a repeated act directed toward a person with the intention of inflicting physical or emotional harm and exert status over the person being bullied. It is repeated, and it is behavior that escalates over time. It leaves the victim feeling terror over the idea that they have to return to the scene of the repeated acts, whether it be school or work.

    This is what I meant by my first post in this thread. People do not know the meaning of bullying. An insensitive person made a rude comment. Rudeness is not bullying.

    Be careful how the "bullying" misnomer can label you. A person who is bullied is a victim. You have not been victimized and this person who made this comment has not exerted power over you. Don't fall into a victim role by believing this is bullying. Don't relinquish your power.
    I only named one circumstance but this person repeatedly made nasty comments towards me. I was bullied. It hurt my feelings. And she was wrong.
  4. by   IrishErin
    Quote from ixchel
    Princess Bride!!!!!!! I should have read the rest of the thread before commenting. Inconceivable!!!!!
    Anybody want a peanut?



    Sorry... Had to!
  5. by   Ruas61
    Quote from EmilyEmily
    Telling someone that "men don't date girls like you" is not considered bullying? What do you call it then?
    It's a tactless idiot or someone who knows how to yank your cord.

    Have you considered discussing this with someone who is neutral? You might need a different perspective.
  6. by   LadyFree28
    Quote from EmilyEmily
    You're gas lighting. She was bullying me.
    As someone who has been gas-lighted, she was NOT gas lighting you.
    Last edit by LadyFree28 on May 17, '14
  7. by   Mulan
    Bullying and lateral violence does exist in nursing for those of you that insist on denying it.

    I suppose all the people and organizations that have addressed it are living in fantasy land?

    http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/729474

    Workplace Bullying in Nursing

    "Bullying is well known, if not well understood, in the nursing profession. Despite the great many articles written on this topic, little is known with certainty about why such rancor exists among nurses. At least, this literature exposes the "hidden" problem of workplace bullying to the light of day. Perhaps by acknowledging it, we will finally be able to put an end to it."



    Bullying in Nursing: Issues & Solutions on ADVANCE for Nurses

    Preventing Nurse Bullying - NurseZone

    Mobile Search

    Bullying and Workplace Violence

    etc, etc, etc
  8. by   LadyFree28
    Quote from Mulan
    Bullying and lateral violence does exist in nursing for those of you that insist on denying it.

    I suppose all the people and organizations that have addressed it are living in fantasy land?

    http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/729474

    Workplace Bullying in Nursing

    "Bullying is well known, if not well understood, in the nursing profession. Despite the great many articles written on this topic, little is known with certainty about why such rancor exists among nurses. At least, this literature exposes the "hidden" problem of workplace bullying to the light of day. Perhaps by acknowledging it, we will finally be able to put an end to it."



    Bullying in Nursing: Issues & Solutions on ADVANCE for Nurses

    Preventing Nurse Bullying - NurseZone

    Mobile Search

    Bullying and Workplace Violence

    etc, etc, etc
    No one's denying "lateral violence" bullying, etc; the fact remains, there are people that are nasty...

    Nastiness/rudeness does NOT always equal bullying.
  9. by   kungpoopanda
    Quote from Mulan
    Bullying and lateral violence does exist in nursing for those of you that insist on denying it.

    I suppose all the people and organizations that have addressed it are living in fantasy land?

    http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/729474

    Workplace Bullying in Nursing

    "Bullying is well known, if not well understood, in the nursing profession. Despite the great many articles written on this topic, little is known with certainty about why such rancor exists among nurses. At least, this literature exposes the "hidden" problem of workplace bullying to the light of day. Perhaps by acknowledging it, we will finally be able to put an end to it."



    Bullying in Nursing: Issues & Solutions on ADVANCE for Nurses

    Preventing Nurse Bullying - NurseZone

    Mobile Search

    Bullying and Workplace Violence

    etc, etc, etc
    Bullying is entrenched in the education and socialisation of nurses. It is passed down from generation to generation of nurses. You only have to look at the power of the self titled "crusty old bats" and the future "crusty old bats" to see this.
  10. by   Ruas61
    Quote from kungpoopanda
    Bullying is entrenched in the education and socialisation of nurses. It is passed down from generation to generation of nurses. You only have to look at the power of the self titled "crusty old bats" and the future "crusty old bats" to see this.
    I think I just got bullied.
  11. by   LadyFree28
    Quote from Ruas61
    I think I just got bullied.
    Sounds like bullying to me
  12. by   ixchel
    Quote from Mulan
    Bullying and lateral violence does exist in nursing for those of you that insist on denying it.

    I suppose all the people and organizations that have addressed it are living in fantasy land?

    http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/729474

    Workplace Bullying in Nursing

    "Bullying is well known, if not well understood, in the nursing profession. Despite the great many articles written on this topic, little is known with certainty about why such rancor exists among nurses. At least, this literature exposes the "hidden" problem of workplace bullying to the light of day. Perhaps by acknowledging it, we will finally be able to put an end to it."



    Bullying in Nursing: Issues & Solutions on ADVANCE for Nurses

    Preventing Nurse Bullying - NurseZone

    Mobile Search

    Bullying and Workplace Violence

    etc, etc, etc


    The existence of bullying is not being debated here. The definition of it is, and whether the OP was, in fact, bullied.

    OP:

    Answer these questions honestly:
    1. Is the behavior recurring and progressing in severity?
    2. Are you the sole target of this person's behavior?
    3. Is this person exerting their power over you, or attempting to ensure you are weakened to them somehow?
    4. Do they intend and implement ongoing emotional or physical harm to you?
    5. Are you literally afraid of this person? Has their behavior caused you actual symptoms of anxiety and fear?
    6. Does this person's behavior actually victimize you?

    To say you're being bullied, the answers to those questions really need to be yes. If they are, you need to go to HR and tell them that a staff member has behaved in a threatening and intimidating manor and can't work with them. Actual bullying is dangerous, and to feel fear from another person at work is not okay.
  13. by   Ruas61
    Relational aggression interesting concept.

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