Advice on creepy doctors?

Nurses Relations

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About a month ago, as I was doing my final check on things and getting ready to head home, one of the drs I regularly work with approached me and asked if i wanted to go out for dinner or drinks sometime. I made a joke about my husband probably not appreciating that and he said 'Maybe another time.'. Fast forward a few weeks, and as I'm walking in in the morning he asks if I'm free that night. I politely decline. It has now been about a month and it has escalated to him putting his arm around my shoulder, to him adjusting the card conveniently over my breast to just today him standing behind me as i was bending over and putting his hands on my hips and pulling me against him. I have told him multiple times now that I'm not interested, and would prefer if our relationship was nothing but professional but every time he dismisses me.

My question is, how do I deal with this? I've tried talking to the higher-ups but I was told that I should get over it. This dr has been working here for much longer than me, and is well respected, there is little chance anyone here would take my side over his.

Should I do something, or am I over reacting and should just ignore it?

allnurses Guide

NurseCard, ADN

2,847 Posts

Specializes in Med/Surge, Psych, LTC, Home Health.

That is harassment and it should not be tolerated by you or your workplace.

Are you sure you are being completely descriptive of what is happening?

Totally unacceptable.

ORNurseCOS

127 Posts

Are you kidding me?

Forget posting here - this needs to be reported ASAP and you husband has a right to know IMO. You've let this continue to long....and his mind you like it by not taking action, hence the escalation. Im sure he's type A and arrogant and things will only get worse.

BrandonLPN, LPN

3,358 Posts

This definitely needs to be reported.

Consult your employee handbook, employee website, whatever you need to in order to find out what your employer's internal mechanism for reporting sexual harassment is.

Failing that, speak with an HR representative. They will know how to initiate the process.

carterr

8 Posts

These comments have definitely confirmed what I thought, that this isn't an overreaction. I'm going to be filing a report tomorrow with my workplace, rather than trying to just speak to the head of my department this time. If not, I'll speak with a hr rep.

And my husband definitely knows, he's offered to key his car a few times, which is very tempting...

PapaBearRN, BSN

203 Posts

Specializes in Nursing Management.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Sounds like you've been put in between a rock and a hard place. I sincerely hope everything works out in your favor and there are no negative repercussions. Please keep us updated!

PapaBearRN, BSN

203 Posts

Specializes in Nursing Management.
These comments have definitely confirmed what I thought, that this isn't an overreaction. I'm going to be filing a report tomorrow with my workplace, rather than trying to just speak to the head of my department this time. If not, I'll speak with a hr rep.

And my husband definitely knows, he's offered to key his car a few times, which is very tempting...

Keying the car can get you fired lol. I know this may sound immature but have you ever thought about just passing loud gas in his presence? That will usually stop a man's pursuit haha.

carterr

8 Posts

Keying the car can get you fired lol. I know this may sound immature but have you ever thought about just passing loud gas in his presence? That will usually stop a man's pursuit haha.

Ahh I know, but if only I could. Hahaha oh man, I did not think of that. I can't imagine his face...

mrsboots87

1,761 Posts

Specializes in Neuro, Telemetry.

Maybe a fake blood smear in the nether regions as you bend over in front of him again. lol

But for reals, thats sexual harassment. No ifs ands or buts. Plain and simple he has taken this too far. Especially with actually touching you in a sexual manner. Whoever told you to just get over it and/or ignore the behavior should also be reported as that is not an appropriate response. You are a woman. Not a sexual object for a pervy Dr to just have his way with. And to imply you are just supposed to take his sexual advances is just plain wrong. Your workplace can get sued over this, so I am sure they will deal with the Dr as well as the higher ups who blew you off. This is ridiculous.

caliotter3

38,333 Posts

He is sexually harassing you. If it were me, I would get another job, unless you have the means and the inclination to deal with the consequences of dealing with this. It doesn't bode well for the "subordinate" employee in most cases. So, again, if it were me, I would get another job.

loriangel14, RN

6,931 Posts

Specializes in Acute Care, Rehab, Palliative.

This is sexual harassment and it's not OK. You should document the details of every incident as well. HR will ask for specifics.

He is sexually harassing you. If it were me, I would get another job, unless you have the means and the inclination to deal with the consequences of dealing with this. It doesn't bode well for the "subordinate" employee in most cases. So, again, if it were me, I would get another job.

No way would I let that creep win by me finding another job! OP should be assertive and file a complaint. Most workplaces have strict sexual harassment policies and take them seriously. Who knows? You might not be the only one who he's targeted. I'm disgusted he thinks he can get away with this.

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