"Seasoned Nurses will eat their young"

Nurses Relations

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Probably a recurring question on here............but...........

Is this still generally true?

Have any of you seasoned nurses treated new nurses badly?

I heard about this often, but I, nor other nurses I know who have graduated within the past 5 years, have experienced this issue. The many seasoned nurses I have worked with never treated me in any way where I felt inferior or ever tried to intimidate me.

Before I started working at my new job, I told my kids' school nurse where I was going to be working and she was like, "Oh wow. Good luck to you there. They treated me terribly. They were the types of nurses who ate their young (but this was nearly 15 years ago)"

But these nurses I work with currently are WONDERFUL. And so were the seasoned nurses at my previous job. I am the baby of the unit, age wise and experience wise and they treat me as if I were their equal (they do offer guidance and help when it seems I need it or if I ask for it).

I, personally, haven't encountered any other new nurses who have complaints about being treated with inferiority by experienced nurses.

So have things changed? Have seasoned nurses become more "tolerant" and/or "nicer"..... Or have we just been lucky?

I think if you're happy with who you are and proud of the work you do, you don't have the desire to pick on other nurses. There are a few nurses who walk around like predators and I just don't understand. Yes, you are smarter and more experienced than the new grad. Feel better?!

There are soooooo many threads on this here. Short answer: some people are too sensitive, some people are too direct, some people need to grow some backbone, some people need to be gentler, and a lot of people have to heed the words in Esme's siggy line from the immortal Sage of Concord:Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson.

My favorite quote is that no one will want to chew on you if you are tough. :)

Specializes in Med surge, ob,pediatrics,GYN,dialysis,ER.

In fairness, you went to school nearly 15 years ago:). I will say that i love being a nurse, however the diverse personalities, drama, and passive aggressiveness by people who are always battling for who knows more clearly is getting old. I have seen the aggressiveness from new nurses as well as older. It knew no age or experience level...i feel they should manage their stress, or kindly go sell shoes:)

I work on a unit where we have been described as eaters of the newbie and as great to learn from. It depends on the new nurse. Come to us willing to learn with no attitude and we will bend over backwards to get you up to speed. Arrive with an "I know everything because I have a degree, don't do am care, and when is my day off" attitude and you reap what you sew (sp??).

It's a two way straight.

Oh good Lord...

Cue the microwave. Pour me a rum & coke. I'm good for the night!

In fairness, you went to school nearly 15 years ago:). I will say that i love being a nurse, however the diverse personalities, drama, and passive aggressiveness by people who are always battling for who knows more clearly is getting old. I have seen the aggressiveness from new nurses as well as older. It knew no age or experience level...i feel they should manage their stress, or kindly go sell shoes:)

Oh, not me....I am a "new" nurse. My kids' school nurse is the one who worked at my current facility 15 years ago. Sorry for the ambiguity :)

There are soooooo many threads on this here. Short answer: some people are too sensitive, some people are too direct, some people need to grow some backbone, some people need to be gentler, and a lot of people have to heed the words in Esme's siggy line from the immortal Sage of Concord:Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson.

My favorite quote is that no one will want to chew on you if you are tough. :)

I kind of figured this topic has been worked to death....but, hey, you never know what others have to contribute.....hence the "disclaimer" up top :D

Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

There are nurses out there that will eat you alive. In my 35 year career I have met 2. There are nurses out there who are kind and thoughtful.

As nurses....we are direct and have grown accustom to very pointed conversation and correction. Some people view this as being a bully and harsh....I have found some of the younger generation that has grown up with being praised at every turn and the "every body wins" generation require a more gentler approach to corrections.

Specializes in Hospice.

I have been told more than once by new nurses that they found me intimidating when they first started, but once we have gotten to know each other, they realize I am just direct, and not stand-offish. I don't want to come off as intimidating or even mean to come across that way, so when I ask why they found me intimidating it is usually for two reasons, "You seem to know everything" and "You don't talk as much as the other nurses." I always let them know I do not know everything, and that I try to learn something new everyday. I may not get into their conversations because I try to keep a divide between business and home. I don't want to know all about their personal business and don't want them to know all of mine, that doesn't mean I am not listening to the conversation though.

Almost all of the nurses who have found me to be intimidating tell me that they are relieved to see my name on the schedule, because the night will run smoother regardless of what is thrown our way. I don't think I am intimidating, I don't yell at a nurse if she makes an error, and I don't correct a nurse in front of other nurses. I want to be respected and I am respectful of others, I don't understand how this comes across as intimidation.

I had one nurse tell me that she didn't like it when she would ask me a question and instead of giving her the answer, I would say, "Let's think about this a second, if......." I was trying to get her to think critically, she just wanted the answer. She went to the manager and told the manager that I didn't like her. Thankfully, the manager knows me and was on my side.

I agree with Esme whole-heartedly, being direct doesn't mean being harsh.

Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
I have been told more than once by new nurses that they found me intimidating when they first started, but once we have gotten to know each other, they realize I am just direct, and not stand-offish. I don't want to come off as intimidating or even mean to come across that way, so when I ask why they found me intimidating it is usually for two reasons, "You seem to know everything" and "You don't talk as much as the other nurses." I always let them know I do not know everything, and that I try to learn something new everyday. I may not get into their conversations because I try to keep a divide between business and home. I don't want to know all about their personal business and don't want them to know all of mine, that doesn't mean I am not listening to the conversation though.

Almost all of the nurses who have found me to be intimidating tell me that they are relieved to see my name on the schedule, because the night will run smoother regardless of what is thrown our way. I don't think I am intimidating, I don't yell at a nurse if she makes an error, and I don't correct a nurse in front of other nurses. I want to be respected and I am respectful of others, I don't understand how this comes across as intimidation.

I had one nurse tell me that she didn't like it when she would ask me a question and instead of giving her the answer, I would say, "Let's think about this a second, if......." I was trying to get her to think critically, she just wanted the answer. She went to the manager and told the manager that I didn't like her. Thankfully, the manager knows me and was on my side.

I agree with Esme whole-heartedly, being direct doesn't mean being harsh.

You were reported for trying to get someone to think critically? Good grief, what a delicate little flower she must have been.

This topic is so hurtful. If someone posted, "Are all new grads self-absorbed and lazy?," there would be a tremendous hue and cry.

Some people are mean, and they can be experienced or new. We need to put a stake in the heart of this rumor. It makes people believe the exp. nurses will be out to get them, so the slightest problem will be deemed NETY.

Some people are mean. They were that way when they started. I think there is frustration when a new nurse comes on and management is expecting he or she to function like a seasoned nurse. So they are carrying the same patient load or getting only minimal orientation. Then when the rest of unit has to help out in addition to their own work that is when people show their true colors.

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