Being a NICU Nurse is a mistake!

Specialties NICU

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All of my life I have wanted to work in the NICU... now that I am in college I have a little problem: I have already chosen pre-nursing as my major, and almost ALL of my family members (except my mom) have made it their job to tell me what a HUGE mistake I am making. They all say I'm stupid for being "just a neonatal nurse practitioner" when I have the chance to become a neonatologist. I have explained to them time and time again that I have explored all of my options and have made my final decision. I know that I am the only one who can make this decision, and it really shouldn't matter what others think, but even my DAD is against my choice and with me being a "daddy's girl", i care deeply about what he thinks. I AM NOT changing my major, but can anyone give me some advice on how to make my family see the benefits of nursing and that being a nurse is NOT a bad thing? or am i just making a big deal over nothing?

Specializes in NICU.

That sucks, darlin! I always find that telling people "I prefer the opportunity to interact with and directly care for my patients to the illusion of status" works pretty well. :stone

funny how often the neonatologists on my unit mention that if they had daughters they would tell them to be nurses instead of neonatologists:)...

i guess you can explain to them that nursing and medicine are not different steps of the same thing. they are collaborative disciplines. that being said, i think it may help to talk to some NNPs, staff RNs, and MDs too. We don't have NNPs on our unit but I thought they usually do the same things as MDs. I like being a staff RN b/c i can punch out and be done with work, and because it is so flexible, and b/c i like connecting with my patients with hands-on care. T.

P.S. a lot of pple not "in the know" don't know a lot about healthcare roles, and therefore make statements based on what they know from the media, etc. if you make the right choice for you they may realize that you made the right decision evenutally.

i would ask why they feel that way and ask for concrete reasons so you can givew them your (i'm sure) well thought out answers. If it is money you can educate them on the salary and how the lesser time in school (money saved), and quicker time for you to start working (money saved and earned) will help enhance the actual numbers that you give them. If they think you won't be doing anything other than "bedpan type duty" you can explain what not only NP's actually do but also what RN's and LPNs for that matter actually do. Impress them with the knowledge, edcuation and skills these nurses need to have. If it is a respect issue, show them the articles stating that nursing is the most respected profession, and tell them (with a big grin) that they raised you to be a person who does not determine respect and self worth by the money you make. (they shouldn't have a negative response to that one!) anyway just some ideas here.

Specializes in NICU, Infection Control.

I think you might try to tell them you're tired of hearing it, and that you'd appreciate support in pursuing YOUR education and future career.

Specializes in NICU.
All of my life I have wanted to work in the NICU... now that I am in college I have a little problem: I have already chosen pre-nursing as my major, and almost ALL of my family members (except my mom) have made it their job to tell me what a HUGE mistake I am making. They all say I'm stupid for being "just a neonatal nurse practitioner" when I have the chance to become a neonatologist. I have explained to them time and time again that I have explored all of my options and have made my final decision. I know that I am the only one who can make this decision, and it really shouldn't matter what others think, but even my DAD is against my choice and with me being a "daddy's girl", i care deeply about what he thinks. I AM NOT changing my major, but can anyone give me some advice on how to make my family see the benefits of nursing and that being a nurse is NOT a bad thing? or am i just making a big deal over nothing?

I am a NICU R.N. in Toronto, Canada and my best friend is a Neonatal nurse pratitioner in the same NICU. I envy her job position as it is widely respected, honourable, and challenging. In our unit, we love our N.N.P's! The doctor's (neonatologists, fellows, residents) all value the N.N.P's opinion. Essentially, other than pronouncing "death", the N.N.P's do the same tasks as the docs. Of course, the pay is less but the responsibilities most certainly are there. Your parents need to learn about what a neonatal practioner actually does! I cannot imagine they would be anything less than thrilled if they knew what you wanted to pursue! Being at the bedside, that's what it's all about.

Specializes in NICU.

My parents both work in the medical profession, and while my father was very proud of my decision to be a nurse, my mother tried to talk me into something else. She wanted me to go to medical school, or at least go on and be a nurse practitioner. She thought I was limiting myself by choosing nursing, and was really down on the profession.

I had wanted to be a NICU nurse from the time I was sixteen years old, and she was quite surprised that I was able to get a job in a Level III unit right out of school. Once she heard about what my job responisibilities were, and once she came to tour the unit...she was sold. She had no idea what a wonderful profession I had chosen. She was just floored by how sick these babies were, and was proud that I was entrusted with their care. She brags about me all the time!!! She sees how much I love my job, and neither of my parents have even suggested that I go on and get my NNP. They know I wouldn't be happy being the one in charge, with all that responsibility.

Plus I'd never want to leave the bedside, and NNPs really are not at the bedside. Yes, they do procedures, assessments, etc. But they don't spend 12 hours a day with these babies and their families. They don't get to focus on one or two babies a day - they have a dozen or more to evaluate and treat. I'd never want to do anything in NICU besides bedside nursing!

NICU nursing is a very noble profession, even for those of us who are "just a nurse" and not an NNP. You might end up liking bedside nursing and not want to go on to be an NNP - it sounds like your family would disown you if something like that happened! I just don't think they understand that nursing is a different profession, and that nurses are just as smart as doctors.

Specializes in Nursing Professional Development.

Like others in this thread, many people tried to talk me out of being a nurse -- but my father, a physician, thought nursing was a great choice. So did many of his physician friends.

Nursing offers more flexibility than medicine, a feature that is important to many people's quality of life. Many physicians feel chained to their careers, burdened by student loans, etc. Of course some are happy -- and some nurses are unhappy. Tell them that you want the flexibility to move from one town to another, or to change specialties if you want to later, or to work part time once you have children, etc.

We simply have to make our choices and live with the consequences. Tell your family that your decision is made. Point out that you can always go to med school later if you change your mind. That might quiet them down a little without offending them.

Good luck,

llg

Thanks Everyone For The Suggestions! I Told My Family Some Of The Things You Said, And They Acted Like They Understood, Yet They Are Still Introducing Me To Their Friends As "my Pre-med Daughter." I Was Watching "trauma: Life In The Er" And One Of The Doctors Was Stitching Up A Guy's Cheek. My Dad Made The Comment "i Bet A nurse Couldn't Have Done That!" I Guess They Wont Get The Picture Until After I Get My Bn... Oh Well!

I just wanted to say I'm very proud of you for standing your ground! In the end, I bet your parents will be beaming with pride when you walk across that stage after earning your nursing degree. Take care.

Specializes in Nursing Professional Development.

Florence Nightingale's family and friends did not approve of her becoming a nurse, either. For many people, nursing simply does not have enough prestige to satisfy their need to impress people. Your family is just going to have to get over that. If they don't, please don't let that stop you from doing what is best for yourself.

Good luck,

llg

My two cents:

My sister-in-law is a forensic psychiatrist. Before that, she was an internist but got tired of constantly pronouncing people dead...very depressing job. She fulfilled her father's wishes and became a MD. She told me a couple of years ago that she envys the nurses she works with (staff nurses and nurse practitioners) because of the patient interaction and being able to connect with the patients in a very human way. I asked her once what she would have liked to do if she hadn't become a doctor; she thought for a moment and said, "An archeologist."

Do what you want with your life... the operative word being your . If your Dad wants to sew up some guy's cheek, maybe he can go back to school and learn how. There is an Emergency Room physician at University Hospital in Las Vegas who went back to school to be a doctor when he was 45 years old. He had been a policeman, worked for the Secret Service, and even owned a business but after having an injury he decided he wanted to become a doctor and said to himself, "It's now or never." and he is very happy being an ER doctor.

Our parents generally only want the best for us but sometimes their idea of what's best is not what ours is too. Their job is to support us and let live the life we were born to do. Your Dad obvoiusly loves you very much. Stick to your guns and do what you want with your life. Sometimes saying, "Thank you Dad for your love and guidence over the years; now trust me to do the best I can with the knowledge you've given me as I make the decision which will make my life a happy one for me."

Good luck in your future endeavors!

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