Jeff Foxworthy on Upstate New York

  1. [font=arial,geneva]

    If you consider it a sport to gather your food by
    drilling through 36
    inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that
    the food will swim by,
    you might live in Upstate New York.

    If you're proud that your region makes the national
    news 96 nights each
    year because Saranac Lake is the coldest spot in the
    nation,you might live
    in Upstate New York.

    If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September
    through May, you might
    live in Upstate New York

    If you instinctively walk like a penguin for six
    months out of the year,!
    you might live in Upstate New York.

    If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they
    don't work there, you
    might live in Upstate New York.

    If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around
    the middle of his
    forehead, you might live in Upstate New York.

    If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
    you might live in
    Upstate New York.
    If your town has an equal number of bars and churches,
    you might live in
    Upstate New York.

    If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with
    someone who dialed a
    wrong number, you might live in Upstate New York.

    YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE UPSTATE NEW YORKER WHEN:

    1. "Vacation" means going South past Albany for the
    weekend.
    2. You measure distance in hours.
    3. You know several people who have hit a deer more
    than once.
    4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same
    day and back again.
    5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during
    a raging blizzard,
    without flinching.
    6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events
    (including weddings).
    7. You install security lights on your house and
    garage and leave both
    unlocked.
    8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your
    girlfriend / wife knows how
    to use them.
    9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over
    a snowsuit.
    10. Driving is better in the winter because the
    potholes are filled with
    snow.
    11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter,
    still winter and road
    construction.
    12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
    13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a
    deer next to your
    blue spruce.
    14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking
    age.
    15. Down South to you means Albany.
    16. A brat is something you eat.
    17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new
    pole shed.
    18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
    19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to
    frost.
    20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your
    car.
    21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."
    22. You actually understand these jokes, and you
    forward them to all your
    Upstate New York friends.

    Sad....but true!!!
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  2. 6 Comments

  3. by   palesarah
    lol! I love this one- I've gotten this (with a few changes) as a "you know you live in NH when..." email.

    Actually, I had to switch from A/C to heat just a few days ago
  4. by   Chevelle
    I live in Jefferson County and this is HILARIOUS!!!!!!!

    SO SO TRUE!!!!!

    Thanks for the laugh because I really needed it!

  5. by   Energizer Bunny
    Hey, this is true in ALL of NY State! LOL! (except the city, I'm sure!)
  6. by   vermonster
    Your post was hilarious-we live in Franklin County, Vermont. We often joke that instead of a show called the OC, we want to do one called the FC and try to show America many of the things in your post.

    Vermonster
  7. by   shel_wny
    HAHAHA!
    So true for all of this here in Buffalo.
    I'm proud to be a Western New Yorker!

    Shel
  8. by   FranEMTnurse
    Quote from shel_wny
    HAHAHA!
    So true for all of this here in Buffalo.
    I'm proud to be a Western New Yorker!

    Shel
    My daughter lived in Buffalo for a while. I lived in the Catskill Mountains, in the New York City Watershed area, and was a New Yorker for 54 years. I was born in Esperance, NY, and I too remember all of this.

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