Took NCLEX today, and tried the PVT.

Background: I'm a 22yo BSN graduate, and I took my Nursing Board exam on 11/6/2014. I am a guy, I suggest reading this in the most manly/upset voice you can come up with.

So today I had the most controversial NCLEX experience I think I may ever go through (provided I pass or fail).

Two nights prior to my NCLEX exam, I had trouble sleeping, and I wouldn't pass out until 5 AM. I have never experienced such lax-anxiety in my life. I was so anxious that I just lied there in bed and did nothing. I tried closing my eyes, and listening to some Lionel Richie (manly music for manly men), but to no avail. I had the same experience while trying to sleep the night before my NCLEX. Needless to say my mind was exhausted from the no-sleep factor, and I know Lionel Richie tried his best to help me out.

Come day of the exam, I left for the testing center at 6:30, as driving on the highway also calms me down, especially if I'm upset. I brought Lionel with me. I went in at 7:30 AM and the exam was underway at 8:10 AM.

1. Tutorial: Check

2. Exam capped out at 75 questions.

3. Time check: 9:20 AM

To my surprise the exam felt a bit more easier than LaCharity's book had me believe. About 50% of my exam was SATA. Topics were almost exclusive to Prioritization and Leadership/Management. I had about two medication questions, and a lot of "Where would you intervene" and "who would you see first". I didn't expect that to be the entire topic of my exam, otherwise I would have studied that more than my medications.

BUTT (hah, slapstick comedy) my anxiety was still there. It was a bit more lax than before, but still there. The fact that I had finished my first NCLEX exam calmed me a bit, but somewhere in my mind I felt inadequate. 75 questions, 50% SATA, having to guess on some questions, I felt really low. I sat there in front of the building searching for posts on this very website, to help comfort my inadequacy.

I texted my friend about the exam, how I felt. People messaged me "good lucks" and one actually tried to call me. When I told them everything, they told me "OH YOU TOTALLY PASSED". I'm glad I had the support of friends, but something on my mind wouldn't "kick" the mindset of "what if you failed?".

I drove back home. Walked into my room. Lied down on the floor with my pillow. And I turned into a vegetable. I woke up around 4 PM, and I decided to check the Pearson Vue website, perhaps my results crept on me while I slept. AND TO MY DISMAY they wrote below my exam "results not available".

"Well screw you too! *loud mumbling, incoherant babble*"

So I decided to try that famous Pearson Vue Trick! So there I was, in front of the computer screen with my CC information all typed out. I was ready to gamble my $200 dollars for a "hint" of whether I passed or not. I paced the room for a good 30 minutes contemplating my decision. I decided not to! So I clicked my computer on (from its screen saving mode), LO AND BEHOLD I CLICKED THE SUBMIT BUTTON WHILE DOING IT.

My heart sank, as I watched it confirm my payment and an email quickly notified me of my payment. "I didn't pass.." I told myself. I sat there in awe, looking at my desk all dazed. I had anger welling up inside of me, as well as a sense of "I knew it". BETTER YET, I ACCIDENTALLY USED MY DEBIT CARD INSTEAD OF MY CREDIT.

Now as a man who is trying to establish credit, this would be a financial nightmare. I called Pearson Vue as to whether they would retract the payment and let me pay with my credit instead. I may have inserted a white lie about having no balance in my debit, and I wanted to avoid getting an overdraft BUTT THAT IS NOT THE POINT. The very kind man representing Pearson Vue told me "I'm sorry to inform you, we cannot provide refunds on NCLEX exams". I was so upset I just accepted my fate, and decided I'll pay for my mistakes and inadequacy.

So I asked him:

ME: "So, I see that my results are not available at this time. And I had already paid for a new exam. If I pass my first exam, will I still have to pay for the second?"

PVDude: *puts me on hold comes back in 3 mins tops

"I did some digging, and I found out that your payment was not accepted."

Me: "Was it declined by the bank?"

PVDude: "I don't know, it just states that the payment was not accepted."

So I logged on to BoA, and found out my money was still intact! MAYBE I DID PASS? I DONT KNOW. Maybe the PVT didnt work for me! I've heard of stories where people were charged, but actually passed. Now I'm spamming the BoN website constantly checking for my name. I WILL LET YOU KNOW WHEN I FIND OUT.

-nick