at work misery

  1. This question is in regards to dealing with a co-worker who is kind of the "unit bully" who everyone fears. And I've heard the old saying of "get tough or get out" especially comming from the Operating Room but I just don't know if I can deal with this. This person insults, humiliates, says things like stupid, and makes fun. (I think the RN is clinically bi-polar with a hx of etoh) And I hate to admit it but I left the job (like many other RN's) out of fear and depression because of this person. I'm in my mid 20's and it really got to me. At that time i was a tech in the ICU. Now soon I'll be a BSN RN and want to go right back into the critical care arena. Going to the supervisor to file an incident report resulted in the entire unit making fun of me and treating me as if I was not a part of the team or something.

    I ask myself serious questions now if I'm able to hack it in this line of work. because in all honesty I am the sensitive, quiet, shy type. I love my job and confidentally stay ahead of my pts and really just have the time of my life taking care of them. But at work I get pushed into this dark corner of fear & depression and my only recourse is to run away and find a new position.

    My co workers believe it or not have encouraged me to yell back and use the obsenities back at this person. To say you're stupid and make fun of them and try and humilate them back. Thats what the other folks do and i've tried but can't do it. It feels embarassing and innapropriate and honestly I just want to get away. I'm not sure if I'm about to or will undergoe some sort of emotional transformation that will allow me to deal with a nut like this? I truelly feel people who are psycho like this definately prey on people that come across as "being able to be picked on" if that makes sense? Its weird how you can get allong with an entire unit like best friends and just "one" individual can make you leave.

    Sorry for the long rant. Just bad days like these you can forget why you started this stuff. Does it get easier? (cause i dont' think these people go away) I can see though how if you continue down this path of misery things will only get worse and you'll just become miserable.
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  2. 6 Comments

  3. by   Rainscape
    I am not a nurse yet, so I can't speak as to your particular work environment. However, Bullying goes on in almost any workplace and is very upsetting. Just don't give anyone else the power to take away YOUR dream.
    You sound like a very caring person and the kind of nurse I would have care for my loved ones. Keep your chin up!
  4. by   catamounts303
    thanks for the reply. what I wonder is will things be different & easier becasue I will be a BSN RN now? Maybe you have more ground then.
  5. by   albnurse
    First here is a hug because you need it

    Always remember in your nursing career that EVERY NURSE HAS VALUE and every nurse has something to contribute!

    Will it get better, Yes... But the unit you are now in may not be the unit for you. Are there other critical care units in you hospital? If so, check them out. The behavior you describe is totally unacceptable at all levels. I would definately go to your Nurse manager and have a heart to heart talk, but first do some research... Go to the AACN website and read about Health Work Environments. This is a nationwide agenda for hospital. Also google the above and check out other websites. Learn all you can before speaking with your manager.Your manager has responsibilies to keep the unit running smoothly on all levels. Discuss your frustration with him/her. You should never be afraid to voice your concers with your manager. If there are problems, there is a chain of command in every nursing department in every hospital. Have you gone to nursing orientation yet? Voice your concerns, find a mentor. Yelling obseneties back at a person is not healthy or productive. Sometimes all it takes is one person to make a change, you can be that person!
    This is not the way to begin your nursing career, but hang in there it will get better. Hope I have given you a jumping off point.
    Best of luck
  6. by   cardiacRN2006
    There is a unit bully anywhere. You can't rely on running away, because there will be another one waiting in the wings.


    That being said, I have already started looking for other jobs because of the same thing. Does it get better-No. What will get better is how we handle the situation, that's all.

    I know exactly how you feel.
  7. by   Hoozdo
    Quote from cardiacRN2006
    There is a unit bully anywhere. You can't rely on running away, because there will be another one waiting in the wings.


    That being said, I have already started looking for other jobs because of the same thing. Does it get better-No. What will get better is how we handle the situation, that's all.

    I know exactly how you feel.
    Never hurts to look around for other jobs! That is what I did after 11 months of ICU experience and landed a job at another hospital that I enjoy much more than my original employer! Not to mention the pay is MUCH better and I actually have a manager that cares about the unit and it's employees. My coworkers work as a team and there are not ANY bullies!
  8. by   cardiacRN2006
    That's great!

    I want to wait until I have at least a year. That way I won't always be looked at as the new kid on the block. I think the younger you are (in terms of experience) the harder the bullies are on you...

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