Re: Discrimination Against Men in Nursing
I just joined allnurses, and stumbled across this thread. I read the first couple of pages, but must admit I have not read all 15 pages, so if my comments are redundant, I apologize.
I feel like the discrimination I run into comes in a variety of forms:
It is not uncommon for both male and female patients to request female RNs and techs at my facility (I work in Traumatic Brain/Spinal Cord Injury). In the case of men, it often seems to be some kind of homophobia, and women seem to feel it's inappropriate for me to work with them (even though there's a pretty good chance they have seen a male OB/GYN at some point who was a lot more invasive and personal than I will ever be). Unfortunately, these requests are often complied with, because we have so many female staff, it is easy to find a woman to work with these patients. If the request was made the other way, it would often be denied, because no male staff is available. The flip side of this issue, that works in my favor and is really rewarding, is that after a male patient has been in our facility for awhile, they often find it nice to have a male nurse because they don't feel wierd about swearing and being crude, and we can turn on Sportscenter or a show with good looking women on it and talk about "guy stuff" and they sometimes feel a little more "normal" after that.
I am often called to help move large patients, which at first was kind of flattering, but is now just annoying. I think female RNs need to put themselves in our shoes, and think of how they would feel if they were constantly asked to perform certain tasks "because you're so pretty". At first it might seem nice and complementary, but it would get old pretty quick.
I am always called to contend with violent/aggressive patients. I don't want to get punched in the face any more than anyone else.
The place where it is the most annoying, though, is in terms of benefits, specifically in the area of pregnancy. Female staff at our facility are routinely given easier assignments as they progress in their pregnancy, either because their doctor tells them they need to take it easy, or because they have complained about how hard it is, or simply because someone feels sorry for them. Because of the very physical nature of our jobs, everyone in our facility needs to pass a physical strength and endurance test to remain employed and avoid injury(moving a 400# tetraplegic patient is no easy task). My thoughts are: if you can't perform the tasks because you're 33 weeks pregnant, go on maternity leave now. If I showed up for work with a badly sprained ankle and said "I need an easier assignment until this ankle heals up", I would be promptly sent home and told to return when cleared by a doctor. It doesn't matter the reason, if you are physically unable to perform the job, stay home until you can, end of story.
Then, after delivery, our female staff are able to use their extended illness leave for the duration of their maternity leave, up to 12 weeks. This is designed to be used if you are physically UNABLE to perform your job due to illness or injury. In the case of most routine pregnancies/deliveries, women are able to return to full physical activity long before 12 weeks, but our facility seems to just let that little fact slide, allowing staff to stay out for the full duration of their maternity leave, while getting paid, without exhausting their normal vacation time. The reason that this bothers me so much, is that when my wife delivers, I will be required to burn up all of my normal vacation time and then, if I want to remain on leave for my entire legally allotted 12 weeks, any additional time off will be unpaid. This hurts me in multiple ways: First off, I obviously will not be paid for my time off if I want to stay home with my wife and newborn child. Secondly, after returning to work, my normal vacation/sick time will be exhausted, if I need to take time off due to my own illness or to take my child to the doctor, or just to stay home with him because he's sick and my wife can't stay home that day, I will need to miss work without pay, or try to make up the shift later in the week. Meanwhile, female staff who have given birth still have their saved sick/vacation time to take days off for their kids. Interestingly, I have found some real support recently from female nurses I work with who are adopting and are really feeling the sting of not being able to use their extended illness leave to stay home with their adopted children, they are essentially in the same boat that I am.
The one place that discrimination seems to work in my favor is that I tend to get left out of many of the petty disputes that my co-workers seem to get into, and they often seem to feel that they can trust me more with personal/private information that some of the other nurses. In addition, I have gotten some great insight into female behavior (including my wife's) by just sitting quietly in the nurse's station and listening. The stereotype that men don't listen or pay attention can come in real handy if you are just quiet and play dumb.
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