Womens interest in male nurses - Page 10

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  1. Apr 9, '06 by
    Maybe I live in my own little world but I hadn't really thought twice about men in nursing seeming 'different'. I'm still in school and there are two guys in my graduating class. Both are kind and compassionate and will make great nurses. Both are also very much male. One is military and spent time in Iraq and the other is a former trucker with a love of Harley's. I have a male friend who is a nurse anesthetist ... also very much male. Actually, I have an openly gay male friend, a nurse, who is very much male as well.

    My husband, a typical engineer personality, hasn't always been the most sensitive sort..... (I'm not saying engineer's can't be sensitive....just DH)... but as we age, he's learning..... thank goodness. I love the sweet and sensitive man....

    Unfortunately, there are always going to be people out there who are either short sighted, ignorant or both.

    Good luck!
  2. Apr 10, '06 by
    Quote from CardioTrans
    I had a picture a couple of years ago that an agency was doing to help promote men in nursing. The title of it was "It takes a real man to be a nurse". There were men in that picture that you would have been surprised to see as a nurse.
    The picture (poster) commissioned by the Oregon Center for Nursing can be viewed at: http://www.oregoncenterfornursing.or...poster_67k.jpg

    The poster helps raise funds for the Oregon Center for Nursing which is a non-prof. This is the link to get the poster:
    http://www.oregoncenterfornursing.or...rOrderForm.pdf

    Regards,

    Ken
  3. Apr 10, '06 by
    Quote from johny1
    I know women want confident manly sort of men, but women also say they like a man to be sensitive and caring.
    No kidding! Nail on the head there. Your assessment skills are excellent.

    Women want both. If you give 'em one they want the other and visa versa.

    When they are younger they seem to go more for whatever they feel is the "manly sort." And after years of enduring a lack of sensitivity they find what they really wanted after all is a "sensitive and caring" man.

    Frankly, in me, these slow learners find a lack of sensitivity for their emotional baggage from having chosen a "manly sort" in the first place. Those who wouldn't give the time of day to a "sensitive" man now want one to help make it all better--not here, thank you. [vent mode=off now] hehe

    Just my 2¢

    Ken
  4. Apr 10, '06 by
    Quote from Corvette Guy
    BTW, I was an aircraft electrician in the USMC, 1980-1988.
    Electronic radar technician, USAF 1975-1979 here. The GI Bill bought my BA in Business Finance.

    Ken
  5. Apr 10, '06 by
    Thanks for that excellent and refreshing poster, Ken! I have seen but never read it carefully before. I will spread it to my nursing friends.

    It's definitely possible and preferable for a guy to be both confident, goal-oriented, and take-charge PLUS sensitive, empathetic, caring, and considerate. Women love that.

    Not only that---these qualities are what nursing teaches and requires of ALL nurses, male or female!

    Look at how women idolize what they call the "gamma male" in romance novels or films---a Highlander or Mel Gibson type who conquers the world, protects his woman, overcomes great odds, and holds a baby's hand, listens well, and shows great compassion for the downtrodden and unhappy.

    Just don't get stuck in the stereotypical "nice guy" category---a doormat, a pushover, a guy who tries too hard to please, or a guy with no idea of whom he is. It's all about balance and showing the appropriate side of ourselves at the right times.

    Also, I view a negative reaction by women to a man in nursing as a quick way to filter out those women who are too backward, narrowminded, conformist, or too much of a social climber to be worth more than a few moments of my time.
    Last edit by Raymond CA on Apr 10, '06
  6. Apr 10, '06 by
    Quote from Raymond CA
    Thanks for that excellent and refreshing poster, Ken! I have seen but never read it carefully before. I will spread it to my nursing friends.

    It's definitely possible and preferable for a guy to be both confident, goal-oriented, and take-charge PLUS sensitive, empathetic, caring, and considerate. Women love that.

    Not only that---these qualities are what nursing teaches and requires of ALL nurses, male or female!

    Look at how women idolize what they call the "gamma male" in romance novels or films---a Highlander or Mel Gibson type who conquers the world, protects his woman, overcomes great odds, and holds a baby's hand, listens well, and shows great compassion for the downtrodden and unhappy.

    Just don't get stuck in the stereotypical "nice guy" category---a doormat, a pushover, a guy who tries too hard to please, or a guy with no idea of whom he is. It's all about balance and showing the appropriate side of ourselves at the right times.

    Also, I view a negative reaction by women to a man in nursing as a quick way to filter out those women who are too backward, narrowminded, conformist, or too much of a social climber to be worth more than a few moments of my time.
    Good Post, thanks. My 2 cents is that i'm a proud male RN working in critical care pulling down six figures and on my way to anesthesia school soon. Have dated female MD's and Residents. Most of the female nurses ask me how many kids do you have?
    I think part of it is the socialization. I didn't feel comfortable saying I was a nurse until I got out of nursing school and my name said RN after it. Now I tell people I'm an RN and usually the first thing they do is give me their business card.
    Sometimes it helps to have a sense of humor about it too... Yep, I'm a male nurse...but I take care of female patients too. I call this de-fokkerization... don't take yourself so darn seriously. If youre really feeling emasculated, then go to LA Fitness and bulk up, get your arms inked up with tattooos, buy a Harley, and then get a job in Labor and Delivery. Guarantee you'll have lots of girls interested in you!
  7. Apr 10, '06 by
    Quote from underwatergirl
    Congrats to you and your wife...I am not too familiar with Olympia, only lived here for 2 1/2 years. I take it you just PCSed here? MAMC, can get a bad reputation...but so does McChord. Healthcare is a difficult thing to run when you got people coming and going constantly. But the ICU should be fun!!!

    Let me know if you and your wife need any ideas on nice areas in Washington....

    annette
    Yes, I'm PCS to Madigan for 3 yrs & reported on April 3rd.

    Please, by all means share info on some good places in the Puget Sound Area [North & South] for Susan & I to visit.
  8. Apr 13, '06 by
    Quote from johny1
    I am a nursing student, currently studying to be an RN. I am really enjoying the experience, however I have an issue that is concerning me.

    When chatting up women and the conversation comes up about what I do, and I reply studying nursing, their eyes widen and the mood seems to change. This is not related to women in the field but those outside. As soon as I utter the word nurse, I seem to go from a confident manly guy to a nice guy to them. I know women want confident manly sort of men, but women also say they like a man to be sensitive and caring. Can’t a male nurse be sensitive and manly? Do these women see nurses as somewhat effeminate, at worst gay?
    If a woman is able to climb the corporate ladder and make big money in business and still have sex appeal, does a man need to limit himself to traditional masculine roles to prove his maleness and be attractive to women or can he do a traditionally feminine job of helping and caring for people.

    I understood that when women refer to equality, it is for both men and women. They it’s a great idea for men to be nurses, but individually, their actions seem to speak louder than their words.

    I would be very interested in your opinions on this both guys and girls
    unfortunately, the word "nurse" still has a negative connotation in today's male dominated world, and some women ahve even picked up on it
  9. Apr 13, '06 by
    Quote from West_Coast_Ken
    The picture (poster) commissioned by the Oregon Center for Nursing can be viewed at: http://www.oregoncenterfornursing.or...poster_67k.jpg

    The poster helps raise funds for the Oregon Center for Nursing which is a non-prof. This is the link to get the poster:
    http://www.oregoncenterfornursing.or...rOrderForm.pdf

    Regards,

    Ken


    Very poster!
  10. May 1, '06 by
    I'm new here (first post), but have followed this thread with great interest -- especially since I've got applications in at nursing schools right now and am a single, heterosexual male.

    Here's an observation that I've made about most men that I've known (this may be true for women too, but I won't comment on the gender that ceaselessly confounds -- and amazes me): Guys tend to like challenges. I believe this is because guys, on some level, are always wondering if they "have what it takes." Do I have what it takes to fight in a war? Do I have what it takes to earn a lot of money? Do I have what it takes to win the affections of that particular woman? Etc, etc...

    At various points in my life I've considered both med school and nursing school. I think the challenges will be very different (both are difficult academically), but for me the challenge of becoming a doctor would be "do I have what it takes to devote every ounce of myself to my academics and chosen profession?" whereas the challenge in nursing would be "do I have what it takes to clean the poop off of this person, and also do I have what it takes to have a career that the public [still] views as being a female profession?"

    My point is, no matter what job you choose you, as a man, will most likely still be (at some level) asking the "Do I have what it takes" question. And, no matter what job you take, the only way to answer it is by doing it.

    ***

    On a personal note, when I think about the type of woman I want in my life I have to admit that many of the nurses and nursing students that I've met come to mind... And aside from being a doctor (or perhaps a patient), I can't think of a better way to get to know more women like that, so it's convenient that this career choice allows that.

    ***

    I am still curious though about a question that's been brought up a few times but hasn't really been addressed too much: Does the fact that a guy is a nurse bias women on more of a "gut"/subconscious level? There have been many women who have said, "I'd TOTALLY date a male nurse," but I wonder how many of them are saying that from a very intellectual, rational standpoint (plus, how many are responding from a nurse's point of view). From their hearts, would women not first fall for a guy who has the nurse qualities (intelligent, driven, caring, sensitive, etc) but who also is a doctor/lawyer/artist/professional athlete/other-career-with-sex-appeal...?

    ***

    It's funny how I feel totally fine talking about becoming a nurse with my fellow nursing students, and I feel totally fine talking about it with some of my friends that are working at restaurants or at REI or driving school busses... but I'm still uncomfortable talking about it with people I don't know or people who have chosen careers that are very socially accepted/respected for their gender. I'd like to believe that I'll love nursing and that I'll find it rewarding, but I admit that, as someone mentioned earlier, "like it or not, what other people think matters." Perhaps I still have something to learn or ways to grow in my self-esteem, or perhaps this harkens back to the "do I have what it takes" question... but public perception is important to me...
    Last edit by jsj42 on May 1, '06