What are your thoughts on patients who request no male nurses taking care of them? - page 12

by Mike A. Fungin RN

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What are your thoughts on patients who request no male nurses taking care of them?... Read More


  1. 1
    as a female nurse .... one bizarre shift it seemed everyone wanted a female cna or nurse. well guess what there was one other female , an aide the rest of the nurses and aides were men. it got annoying to me (yes i know it is not about me) but some of these pts wanted only me or the female aide to answer their bells.???? i dont know if on days this extended to pt/ot and respiratory also. seemed not to extend to drs. i can understand straight caths, peri care, urology , obgyn appointments but have seen the , "i prefer female nurses" border on ridiculous.
    Fiona59 likes this.
  2. 1
    Quote from CrazierThanYou
    Most WHAT are gay? I hope you aren't insinuating that most male nurses are gay because that is flat out ridiculous. I know many, MANY male nurses and none of them are gay.
    Really, none of them?

    I know many male nurses and I'd say it's at least half and half. Not that it has anything to do with this thread, but I'm not sure which comment surprised me more....her saying most are gay or you saying none are gay.
    anotherone likes this.
  3. 1
    I would have no problem with a female patient's request to have a female nurse over me as a male. I've had one patient specifically request that only male nurses and aides help him to the bathroom. I would likely prefer a male nurse in many instances if I were a patient.
    Fiona59 likes this.
  4. 2
    Quote from abiklags

    this modesty is not only for intimate issues. i went for a manicure last week and politely declined the request to have the male manicurist do my nails. in my circle there is no casual touching between male and females other than immediate family or husband/wife. when i meet men for professional reasons i politely say i cannot shake hands for reason of religion. i have yet to have a man be insulted when i refused.


    (please note, some of this is simplified for easier understanding. also, other circles may be more strict or more lenient than I wrote)
    I would like to see the reaction on people's faces when you go for a job interview and tell them you cant shake hands and leave them with their hand hanging in the air, then tell them you cant do male catheters or work this or that day..... first impressions are important. I respect you point of view and I just saying that you wont have the time to explain your reasons for doing things or not doing things to every single person, Doctor, Fellow Nurses, PATIENTS...... that shield/barrier you come with might affect your nursing carrer. You will get the detoxing/agressive patient the suicidal one, the very sweet and understanding, the demanding.... how will you accomplish the tasks needed to get this patients thru their day?

    Nurses reagarless of color, religious preference, gender, sexual preference, age etc are expected to act in a professional way. Just for the records men CAN care for female patients because they are professionals and ofcourse women CAN take care male patients because they are profesionals as well.
    anotherone and Fiona59 like this.
  5. 0
    I agree that it is a comfort issue. We have a floor where I work where men don't usually work on that floor because a majority of the woman on the floor don't want men to take care of them. At first I took offense by it but now I realize it is a comfort issue and it's their right to have someone else take care of them if they want.
  6. 0
    I'm sorry, I didnt see your post until now. for MEDICAL reasons, I am allowed to touch the opposite gender, yes even for male caths. and yes, I have had that at meetings and interviews. no one has been offended by declining a hand shake.

    like you said in your last paragraph, I am a professional and I act as such. it IS possible to be religious and a nurse at the same time.
  7. 1
    Personally I think it's best to honor the patients wishes and move on.
    I've had men request male caregivers, men request female caregivers,
    female request male caregivers and females request female caregivers.

    I've had patients tell me they didn't want a **homophobic slur** taking
    care of them, I've had patients tell me they love gay male nurses.

    I've worked on units when patients knew I was there and requested me,
    and then work on the opposite unit the next day and hardly get any
    assignments because clients on that side only wanted females.

    I think as far as general routine nursing care, such as med-administration,
    non-intimate dressing changes and the like, any nurse should suffice. It's
    would be impractical to assign another nurse for these types of duties.

    However, for more intimate cares such as bathing or examinations, if the
    client requests a same-sex caregiver or an opposite sex-caregiver or a
    green jello mannequin caregiver with 3 eyes wearing tipjar stilletos - I think
    reasonable accommodation should be made. It can be VERY uncomfortable
    and almost traumatic having someone you don't want caring for you examine
    your intimate areas.

    I've heard several female 'caregivers' make disparaging remarks about the
    size of male patients private parts, or on the opposite end of the spectrum,
    say how ''their wives must be happy.'' I think those types of remarks are
    extremely unprofessional and have no place in nursing.

    As far as someone making fun of patients ''ladybits'' I find that deeply
    disturbing and If that happened to me I would have been mortified.

    As far as myself, I'd prefer any nurse who was compassionate, provided
    for privacy, and provided quality care. Their sex is a non factor to me.

    I've also heard horror stories of old-school nurses striking a patients penis
    with a spoon because it was aroused during peri-care. I think that's one of
    my biggest fears, If I ever was to be a patient in a hospital and unable to
    provide my own care, I would probably die of embarrassment if I became
    aroused during peri-care. I'd probably jump out the window. I don't think
    people understand how automatic that reflex is sometimes with male patients.
    marine2nursing likes this.
  8. 0
    Quote from JoyfulNurseLPN

    I've also heard horror stories of old-school nurses striking a patients penis
    with a spoon because it was aroused during peri-care.
    I hope that this is a myth, because aside from being incredibly painful, I suspect there is a potential for some real soft-tissue injury. Anything from a nasty purple-black bruise to a damaged blood vessel that could become permanently discolored and painful.

    Meanwhile, a friend of mine in Nursing School just had to report a gaggle of her classmates, as during clinicals they were peeking under the gown of unconscious male patients and giggling about penises. In a school that has nearly a 2-year waiting list, I would hope that these girls would be ejected from the program to set an example of what unprofessional behavior can earn you.
  9. 0
    Quote from mofomeat
    In a school that has nearly a 2-year waiting list, I would hope that these girls would be ejected from the program to set an example of what unprofessional behavior can earn you.
    You can't really blame them tbh. You can't expect people that are just starting the nursing program or any healthcare program to already have some type of hospital experience, or constantly seeing nude bodies for that matter. If I hadn't obtained my job this past June in the hospital as a lift assist team, I would be starting the nursing program and being a bit shy during clinicals. People will be curious and people will always gossip. I am 100% certain that there are females and males in the professional nursing world that do just that (also indicated by in previous posts).

    But yes, most definitely this type of behavior should not be in the professor world, but there's no doubt that it will appear.

    Back on topic, I personally could care less if they asked for a female caregiver. I would just make sure that I respect the patient's wishes.
  10. 1
    Quote from mofomeat
    Meanwhile, a friend of mine in Nursing School just had to report a gaggle of her classmates, as during clinicals they were peeking under the gown of unconscious male patients and giggling about penises. In a school that has nearly a 2-year waiting list, I would hope that these girls would be ejected from the program to set an example of what unprofessional behavior can earn you.
    Quote from barcode120x
    You can't really blame them tbh. You can't expect people that are just starting the nursing program or any healthcare program to already have some type of hospital experience, or constantly seeing nude bodies for that matter. If I hadn't obtained my job this past June in the hospital as a lift assist team, I would be starting the nursing program and being a bit shy during clinicals. People will be curious and people will always gossip. I am 100% certain that there are females and males in the professional nursing world that do just that (also indicated by in previous posts).
    Umm, yes you can blame them. It doesn't take experience in the healthcare field to know that this kind of thing is unacceptable- it just takes some common sense and respect for fellow human beings.
    CountyRat likes this.


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