What are your thoughts on patients who request no male nurses taking care of them?

ArrowRN, BSN, RN · Jul 11, 2012

I would wonder if they also request no male physicians, and if not, wonder why people have a hang-up about male nurses, but don't seem to bat an eye about male doctors.
This is a common request on the OB unit on which I work, where we regularly have women who are from Egypt or Somalia, and it's a common cultural practice that they only have female care providers (nurses AND physicians). Luckily, most of the residents at our teaching hospital are women, so it's easy to accommodate.

Culture does have a lot to do with it. Where I'm from , not even expecting DADs are allowed in the OB wards...much less for male nurses nor doctors, all the deliveries are done by women. I do agree that honestly, I've hardly ever hear requests for a female doctor, if at all, most patient just go with what ever doctor gender is on that shift, which is a bit odd...so I think there's more to it than just a comfort issue.

toddmeyer11 · Jul 14, 2012

I am a CNA @ a nursing home. There is only 1 resident there who won't allow me to provide care for her because I am a male. Both her, and her sister who visits her often, want nothing to do with me. I respect her opinion / decision. There is multiple possibilities why she may feel that way. Unfortunately, in some females' minds, things that some males do to women gives all of us a bad name.

zieglarf, LVN · Jul 16, 2012

this modesty is not only for intimate issues. i went for a manicure last week and politely declined the request to have the male manicurist do my nails. in my circle there is no casual touching between male and females other than immediate family or husband/wife. when i meet men for professional reasons i politely say i cannot shake hands for reason of religion. i have yet to have a man be insulted when i refused.

I'm not trying to be an ass or offensive so please don't take my question that way.

If you can't even shake hands with a man then how will you be able to do nursing? You will need to do much more than shake hands.

In theory you could work with all female patients (i.e. maternity), but there is no guarantee that will happen - especially for you entire career.

abiklags · Jul 16, 2012

I'm not trying to be an ass or offensive so please don't take my question that way.
If you can't even shake hands with a man then how will you be able to do nursing? You will need to do much more than shake hands.
In theory you could work with all female patients (i.e. maternity), but there is no guarantee that will happen - especially for you entire career.

No offense taken. the key word is 'casual'. Many great Rabbis have said it is forbidden for a jewish man or woman to shake hands with the opposite gender, even if the other party is non-jewish. casual touching that is not medically needed is not allowed.

when working with male pts, it is medically needed and I am allowed to do my care. The rules of the Torah are for us to live by, not to die. If someone's life is in danger, many many rules which are generally kept may be pushed out of the way. for example, childbirth is considered in Halacha (jewish law) as life threatening. one is allowed to pick up the phone and call 911, a taxi etc ON THE SABBATH (when these things are forbidden) to get to the hospital. there are still limitations on what one is allowed to do but many things are pushed to the side until the danger has passed.

these laws are rather intricate and i tried to explain them clearly. If i have not succeeded, ask away. I will gladly answer questions regarding this.

I actually hated my maternity rotation and did everything but swear i was never going to work there

zieglarf, LVN · Jul 16, 2012

Your answer makes sense to me and is what I suspected. Thanks!

abiklags · Jul 16, 2012

Your answer makes sense to me and is what I suspected. Thanks!

you're very welcome

toddmeyer11 · Jul 16, 2012

Zieglarf,If you were referring to my response, you're very welcome. I'm glad I could help. Either way, I hope my response helped.

delerben · Jul 16, 2012

There's plenty of patients to go around. Just respect their wishes and move on.

Ruby Vee, BSN · Jul 16, 2012

no offense taken. the key word is 'casual'. many great rabbis have said it is forbidden for a jewish man or woman to shake hands with the opposite gender, even if the other party is non-jewish. casual touching that is not medically needed is not allowed.
when working with male pts, it is medically needed and i am allowed to do my care. the rules of the torah are for us to live by, not to die. if someone's life is in danger, many many rules which are generally kept may be pushed out of the way. for example, childbirth is considered in halacha (jewish law) as life threatening. one is allowed to pick up the phone and call 911, a taxi etc on the sabbath (when these things are forbidden) to get to the hospital. there are still limitations on what one is allowed to do but many things are pushed to the side until the danger has passed.
these laws are rather intricate and i tried to explain them clearly. if i have not succeeded, ask away. i will gladly answer questions regarding this.
i actually hated my maternity rotation and did everything but swear i was never going to work there

and how will you handle working your weekend requirement if it entails working on the sabbath?

abiklags · Jul 17, 2012

and how will you handle working your weekend requirement if it entails working on the sabbath?

the halachot (laws) regarding working on sabbath are very complex and require asking a rav (rabbi). as i am neither a rabbi nor is this question applicable to me at this time, i do not have an answer for you. from what i know, i cannot take a job that would require me to plan to break sabbath. if i am at home or in a place that someone's life is in danger, then i can push off the restrictions to a degree. but planning to be mechalel (desecrate) the sabbath in advanced is in a very different category. i believe there was a thread on this vein a number of years ago that i found while roaming around on an a while back

Catch22Personified · Jul 17, 2012

"Don't want a male nurse"

Next!

mo929 · Jul 18, 2012

i dont believe that this is an issue no i am not a rabbi but there is a easy solution work every sunday instead