backstabbing co workers

I work with two such bullys that are best friends. I realized that i was my own worst enemy because i tried to give them the benefit of the doubt and be somewhat friendly to them. On numerous occasions they turned around things i said to hurt other people or spread gossip. people like this do not want to make friends.
I am still friendly but when they ask my opinion or they ask me about a coworker I tell them I do not know anything about it, or i say i don't know i've never thought about it. They pretty much leave me alone because they can not get any information from me.

melissa

I just remembered my supv told me one day about some nurses that she kept reporting to the don and nothing was done so she started WRITING THEM UP but she always made a copy of the report because she knew the don would throw it away. One thing led to another and the big boss asked the don about the situation and when she said she was unaware the supv pulled out her copys and told him she didn't understand why she was not aware. MY LESSON FOR THE DAY WAS IF YOU WRITE SOMEONE UP MAKE A COPY OF THE ORIGINAL.

MELISSA

MELISSA

Usually these types, I have found, spend more time causing problems then solving them. My way of dealing with them is IGNORE< IGNORE< IGNORE! Keep my head up, keep giving the best nursing care that I can. Sooner or later, these types fall on their A@@ !!



Sure the steelers won the super bowl, but I want to say it some more.....:hatparty:

work with two such bullys that are best friends. I realized that i was my own worst enemy because i tried to give them the benefit of the doubt and be somewhat friendly to them. On numerous occasions they turned around things i said to hurt other people or spread gossip. people like this do not want to make friends.

Sorry you are going through this. I completely commiserate-going through the same thing. Two bullies-sometimes three.

I went to the manager with a fellow co-worker to back me up. This co-worker witnessed the bullying and comments. I felt I needed back up because I didn't want the NM to think I was being oversensitive. I needed evidence.

The NM had a talk with everyone re: code of conduct etc. Made no bones about the fact that this behavior would not be tolerated on the unit. Bless him, he's a good, fair manager.

Now it has turned into silence, a fake "HI!" when the manager is there and complete snubbing when management isn't there (like, not responding to "hello").

I cannot take it. When I go to my regular shift, I have to work with these people. I'll probably leave because this soap opera is wearing me out.

Hope things work out the best possible way for you!

is there a "soap opera" in every hospital? the bully on my floor is the only male nurse (the other two good ones left the unit because of the drama). last night our only LNA was in the ER because she got hurt. he sat on his rearend while i answered every bell, toileted all his patients and had to do a full bed change. i had a 7 pt assignment which included awoman dying of kidney failure and a young girl detoxing from heroin. i realized as soon as i got home that i didn't sign offf a nitro patch that i had removed so icalled the nurse who relieved me and told her so she could leave the med sheet out for me to sign when i got there tonight. so tonight i had a onw patient assignment because it was a one on one mentally challanged preson who just had surgery and was pulling out all of his iv's and tubes all day. i was relieved for a few minutes to call the surgeon. this nurse started ranting and raving that if i wasn't so concerned with calling my kids to say good night i would have signed the sheet off. he went on and on about people like me who spoil their kids.(by the way he's in his 50's and still lives with his mother) i didn't realize iwas spoiling my 2 yr old by telling him i loved him before bed every night. later on the surgeon called me back so i went to the nurses atation in front of the room to speak to him. my patient was asleep and i could see him. when i hung up the phone, the pt rolled over and started to slide out the foot of the bed. this nurse was walking by and watched me run into the room and catch the pt before he totally fell out of bed, looked me straight in the face from the doorway and said "wow that was close" and kept walking. when i lifted the pt's legs it startled him and he woke up and started kicking. he kicked me in the abdomen and the nurse never helped me. i am 4 1/2 months pregnant. i am okay but it's the point. what next, is he going to say i am spoiling my child by letting it spend nine monthes in the womb?
i apologize. i read this thread and needed to vent.

i agree with you tweety .You stand up for yourself. You call them on every nasty move they make, if they make it to you otherwise you have to mind your own business. You don't give them power over you. You use the chain of command.
i would stand up for my self and anyways it sounds like this bully nurse needs a job change or an attitude adjustment

this nurse was walking by and watched me run into the room and catch the pt before he totally fell out of bed, looked me straight in the face from the doorway and said "wow that was close

Not only does this nurse make the work environment miserable (with his comments, etc) but he actually put you and this patient in danger. It's bad enough that people have to waste their time and energy "defending" themselves against such people but now it affects patient care. He should have helped you to protect your safety and the patient's safety. Glad you are ok.

Ok these are all great posts, but how can I learn to confront someone without crying? It seems like I start of great and then the tears come out. I end up feeling miserable, and weak.

i don't know if anyone has suggested this or not yet but i say confront that person. bullies don't like confrontation. the bully in my post who wouldn't help me was actually confronted by another co-worker which caused others who have been in the same situations woth that person to also speak up. he gave his resignation.

I agree with you liljsmom regarding confronting the bully. At the previous facility where I used to work at there was one nurse & the unit secretary.....who both continued to bully whoever they could. I was polite and figured ignoring them, they would stop. They continued with their charades, and since I avoid confrontations, they continued, thinking I wouldn't say anything. I was missing mail out of my personal "In" bin and often I would not get a copy of the latest nursing minutes from our meetings and/or upcoming events etc.. I would ask the secretary if she had forgotten to place a copy in my bin like the other nurses received, she would say..."No, I put it in there". This continued & I told my nurse manager several times & she brought the two of them in her office & questioned them, of course they both denied it. A few weeks later I had enough of the nurse's bullying and the secretary not putting mail in my bin, then I asked them both to step aside that I wanted to talk to them. They both looked at each other & smirked. Once I got them alone, I told them both that I was tired of their CRAP & if it doesn't stop now, then I had no choice but go to HR and file a harrassment suit against the both of them and that I had been documenting their behavior towards me. They both looked at me, I think they were in shock,...lol. They both told me they were sorry (I know it wasn't sincere), but none the less, they stopped picking on me. The bad news is they continued picking on any nurse that was hired (young, old, new, experienced...it didn't matter). I eventually resigned after a year or so when that occured and found a much professional working environment with some great people. Best of luck to you.