NEED HELP WITH WIFE

Your wife's problem is not about the other women. It's about her own fears and insecurities. No amount of explaining your thoughts or discounting the appearance of your classmates, teachers, patients, innocent passersby will completely alleviate her concerns because they are not the problem. It IS important that you let her know you value her and find her attractive, but by itself, that isn't sufficient to fill the hole in her spirit.

The fact that she has a history of sexual abuse and a difficult life strongly suggests that these issues are still actively hurting her. You are both very fortunate that she was able to enter into a healthy marriage and have a child. Many former victims can't trust enough to do either.

The fact that you are starting nursing school isn't causing her insecurity; it's revealing what is already in there. If it weren't this situation, there would probably be another trigger at some point. An attractive neighbor or nice-looking coworkers (which will likely occur when you start working as a nurse). Eliminating the competition may put a lid on the symptoms for a time, but it won't fix what's broken.

I think to call her an abuser is a little hysterical. Not everyone focused on her need for help.