Does nursing change you into an angry person?

[DesireeBeyerGreen]

I read a lot of posts and my aunt who has been an LPN for over twenty years has told me to stay far away from nursing. She works in LTC, I believe, mostly nursing homes. I don't think I have ever heard her say anything good about the field. I want to be a nurse. I admire the field and the men/women who do it every day. I think if I'm going to work and work hard it should be doing something that benefits mankind as a whole. I can't think of anything better than helping sick people. Corny, maybe, but I'm an corny person. My question is...does nursing turn you into an angry, bitter burnt out person. Only if you let it or is it just inevitable by how the whole system is set up?

My goal is to make a career out of nursing. I want to learn as much as I can and advance as far as I can go. I come from nothing, high school dropout, married young, kids young, and I'm one class away from being accepted into the LPN program. I want to make my children proud of me. What's your opinions nurses? Does your job make you a hateful person?

[Amnesty]

I agree with the poster who said you just have to build up a wall and not let the bad stuff get through it to harm you. Sometimes it will, and you have your breakdown and you go right on about your life. It makes you stronger. I've worked a lot of crappy jobs, and I don't think that I could've survived them without that kind of mentality.

[KRSLPN, LPN]

I wouldn't say it turns you into a mean person, but there is a certain level of frustration from caring for the people who have never worked a day in their entire life, who live on public assistance then come into the health care facility and begin demanding "star" treatment.

It's also very difficult to deal with the totally non compliant patient, the one who disregards all doctors' orders then shows up at the health care facility and expect to be "fixed".

Those are the things, to me, add up to frustration in the job, which in turn changes once good, caring nurses into detatched med passing machines.

[TheMediaLies]

The first 1-5 years after graduating? No. Afterwards you get tired of the bs and go back to school to be an RN where you encounter more bs.

[LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN]

My feeling is this (and I have worked LTC as an RN almost 7 yrs). Your job can not turn you into anything. We all cope and deal with interpersonal environmental and situational stress in different ways. Seems nursing somehow brings out either the best, or the worst in those of us who have chosen this path. CHOSE being the key word. Just as we have chosen this profession. We also make daily, hourly decisions and choices regarding how we deal with and react to our co-workers, mgmt, patients, families, MD's etc. I go into work each day making a very conscious choice to be pleasant, respectful and positive. Nothing, or no one can MAKE me be anything other than what I chose to be. Sure, circumstances arise that can challenge my outlook/attitude on any number of things. But allowing myself to become negative and nasty is completely counterproductive. The patient's pick up on the negativity, be sure of that. Think about it. Sometimes you, the professional nurse (and staff) might be the only human interaction our patient's have on a consistent basis. Especially those poor older folks who don't have loving families that come to visit. WE are all they have. It is SO NOT FAIR to the very prople who count on us to have to be exposed to our negativity. Plenty of nurses are hateful and negative with one another and then put on the phoney sweet smile for the matter of minutes they spend with a patient. Well maybe if the nurse wasn't so caught up in her/his own negative (bs). They just might spend an extra minute or two to be genuinely interested and concerned for the patient. Not just slap on a smile and get in and out of their room asap. Although compassion is not "cost effective", and even though we nurses are only human who can so easily let low staffing ratios, sub par mgmt, certain co-workers who may rub us the wrong way and so on... get under our skin so much so that it effects our professionalism, not to mention our productivity and what we project outwardly to others. Subconsciously those NURSES who DON'T strive everyday to make the right CHOICE to make the best out of resources (however limeted), to truly try and give our co-workers and our patients the benefit of the doubt, to make lemonade when lemons are being thrown at us from all directions. After so long it becomes increasing difficult to remain positive and it seems the stressors of just being a nurse in this day and age does effect some nurses who choose not to make a concerted, conscious effort EVERYDAY to stay positive, remain calm and not to start, or buy into the backstabbing and gossip that is running rampent in this profession. I don't know about others. I can only speak for myself. But in the grand scheme of things; I have found being pleasant and positive certainly makes my day better as well as those around me. I would rather go find another profession if I were really so unhappy and hateful in my position as a nurse whether RN, or LPN. My day, my attitude and what I project to others are a direct reflection of my desire and true essence of the nurse that I am. The nurse that I AM makes choices to remain consistently positive. When challenging situations are presented to me during my daily routine. I stop, take a deep breath. Remember the oath I took 7 years ago, which in turn inspires me to dig deep if I must and take a negative, then somehow, someway extract the positive and use it constructively if at all possible. If not, then learn valuable lessons from it in order to react to similar circumstances differently when they arise in the future. Bottom line is... and as I have stated all along. NOTHING and NO ONE can MAKE me be hateful and unhappy as much as it is how I decide to deal with and process things. Heck no! It is not always the easiest path at the time. In the long run though. It helps me keep my sanity and lets the patients who are entrusted to my care know that I am interested, invested and easy to approach with any concerns they may have. For most of these patient's, this is the roughest thing they have had to deal with in their lifves. I owe it to myself, to my patient's and to my employer to make good choices. I chose positive, compassionate care and am darn proud of it!!![/quote']

^I second THIS.

I have learned on this wild ride of nursing to have a CHOICE...I have learned to make lemons out of lemonade with subpar to no supplies, advocate and be firm even when the pt or their family believes the sky is falling and form respectful bonds that have produced thousands more favorable rather than unfavorable nurse-pt relationships, and scale back on hours when it may be getting to be too much. I have left places when I felt they were not having the pt's best interest or attempting to interfere with nursing and never looked back.

After all these years, I still enjoy the challenges frustration and investigative adventure of nursing. I enjoy when my nursing goals are able to get met ...I still do a goofy happy dance if a pt needs to pee or poop, lol...or if they are taking steps or regaining sensation from a spinal cord injury, or defying odds as a special needs patient. Those are the things I focus on as a nurse; helping to maximize and empower my patients as humanely possible within that time frame. I then clock out an enjoy my life on my time. :)

[ktwlpn, LPN]

I don't know about you but I have bills to pay such as rent and utilities and without going back to school Im not going to get a job paying me 23.00/hr. I cant live off of 10.00 an hour so I stay miserable. Where are you working that's not miserable so that I can come get a job? Maybe you havent worked in LTC before this forum is always broadcasting the misery in nursing. I say more of us are miserable than happy and this is because of the politics of nursing and nursing being run as a business and so many other things that arent being talked about but rather swept under the rug Nursing has gone to pot!

I 've been a nurse for close to 25 years and prior to that I worked as a CNA for close to 5 years.I was a CNA in LTC and have worked probably half of my career in LTC where I continue to work full time now.I make a very good living. IMHO miserable people are very LOUD-it is true that misery loves company.I happen to work with a good many contented peers.We all deal with a certain amt of politics and BS and that's true of every job.That's is not unique to nursing

Health care IS a business ,our patients are consumers and they can go elsewhere for the services they need. I'll tell you the 2 most important things I have leraned over the years-the things that have helped me be postive about nursing.First -you have to accept that you can not MAKE a patient or family comply with the plan of care and you can NEVER take their actions personally and second-Learn how to work within the system to get the things you need for your patients and this is especially important in LTC where everyone thinks their opinion matters the most and they all have an agenda.The best thing to do is communicate directly to the MD and stress how concerned the family is and you'll get immediate action.There are my TWO rules for staying sane ...I work in southeastern Pa,I think we start certified CNA's at $14 or $15 an hour now.

[LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN]

I 've been a nurse for close to 25 years and prior to that I worked as a CNA for close to 5 years.I was a CNA in LTC and have worked probably half of my career in LTC where I continue to work full time now.I make a very good living. IMHO miserable people are very LOUD-it is true that misery loves company.I happen to work with a good many contented peers.We all deal with a certain amt of politics and BS and that's true of every job.That's is not unique to nursing

Health care IS a business ,our patients are consumers and they can go elsewhere for the services they need. I'll tell you the 2 most important things I have leraned over the years-the things that have helped me be postive about nursing.First -you have to accept that you can not MAKE a patient or family comply with the plan of care and you can NEVER take their actions personally and second-Learn how to work within the system to get the things you need for your patients and this is especially important in LTC where everyone thinks their opinion matters the most and they all have an agenda.The best thing to do is communicate directly to the MD and stress how concerned the family is and you'll get immediate action.There are my TWO rules for staying sane ...I work in southeastern Pa,I think we start certified CNA's at $14 or $15 an hour now.

^AWESOME sage advice!!! I second THIS!!!