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| Thanksgiving Day | | I like this brand of Thanksgiving. The ham is in the oven, the pies are made. We're kicking back, watching football and playing on the computer(s). The house is warm, and filled with lovely scents.
Wishing everyone a happy, loving Thanksgiving holiday! | | Grumpy week | | Well...that was an interesting week. Actually the weekend was pretty fun. My son was with his grandparents so I went to play in the city with hubby. Saw the movie 2012, which had some amazing graphics. Saw a Blazer game. Ate out...fun stuff.
But what with getting constant emails from the new job about all the things I SHOULD have done before I start, that they aren't providing until the last minute, and it nearing the holidays with my Mom pouring on the pressure, I was maxing out on stress. I'm convinced that for years our Thanksgiving (and likely Christmas too) was spelled S T R E S S. Which is sad, as it is supposed to be a celebration. Not a balancing act, a chance to practice thick skin, a time when you end up pleasing no one because you're trying to please everyone. Sigh.
So... change in plans. Tonight I'm making chocolate pecan pie and candied walnuts. Two separate dishes there. Tomorrow we're (and I mean we as in hubby and I) serving a ham and scalloped potatoes. The idea was supposed to be 'go for easy'. But as usual, I'm complicating things. I'm going to make a pumpkin pie too. I mean, what is thanksgiving without pie?
I'm also in hiding. This year I am not going to the big family gathering at my mother's. I hit that stress wall a couple of days ago and all of a sudden I thought, NO. I'm 50 years old and still scrambling to try and get my mother's approval, still going into a situation where it is deliberately set up to elicit sibling rivalry. When my parents were 50, they were hosting the gathering. All the holidays are like that. For years, packing up the kids and hauling them elsewhere for the holidays.
So this year we're at home. If anyone wants to show up, they're welcome. But I'm not going. I'm not. I'm here. MY family is here.
Oooh, you should smell that pie!!!!! | | All that Jazz | | My son had a concert last night. It was at a neighboring high school, and seven schools were participating, each a 'specialty' choir. My son's choir is a small jazz ensemble. I wish I'd gotten a picture, but I was so stressed in just getting him there that I forgot the whole issue of pictures.
He did look good, the guys wear black pants, belt, black shirt and a pale blue tie. Hubs was still on his way home so I had to tie his tie. Yikes. Oh well, on stage it looked okay. I'm used to seeing DS in jeans and a T-Shirt, so it was fun to see him all gussied up. They did very well, one of the better groups there, and they performed all their pieces a capella, so you could really hear the voices.
I'm actually working a 'real' day today, 8:30 to 4:30. Well, almost a real day. | | Rascal Flatts | | Just followed the link in Kolohe's journal and listened to the song. Great. Now I'm going to work with puffy eyes and runny makeup.
There was a time in my life when I got sooooo close to that dark spot. If not for the intervention of a friend, I'm not sure what would have happened. I certainly wasn't pulling out of it on my own. For that intervention, for that caring, I will always be grateful. There's a lot of life and fun that I've enjoyed since, that I would have missed.
Rascal Flatts has a way of touching heartstrings. I love the song Skin, and another of theirs has been a longtime favorite. My brother called me the other day and was talking about the broken road, and he actually got a little choked up. My brother! He's so happy to have found his (gee they're married now) wife. I keep forgetting. They sneaked away the weekend my son got married and they got married on the beach in Hawaii. I guess we're just slow learners. wry grin. | | Winter waves | | I woke at 6:00 this morning, as if the alarm had gone off, but of course it hadn't. My mind just tends to do that. I don't know what my schedule will be like this week at all, but I got it close to 16 hours last week at the surgery center, so that'll put me at what I needed to earn this month already to make my 'budget' (grin) work (counting the check I just deposited from the last two weeks of October). LOL, the rest is gravy, and as I'm not starting until the END of November, any gravy will be appreciated.
I also talked to my ex yesterday who is WORKING again! Hallelujah!!! He's making less than half of what he did before, but expects to work his way up a bit. And he actually sounded happy to be working. He'll be sending child support again. Obviously, not as much as he had to before, we negotiated it to half, but half is WAY better than zero.
I had a really wonderful weekend. DH came down from the city Sat, even though it's his weekend with his boy. The boy had plans, so we went to the coast to see the breakers after the storm. That was so much FUN!!! They were huge! There was one spot where the highway crosses close to the surf, and spray was shooting up and soaking cars and people.
There really isn't a good way to catch the power and magnificence of the waves, but DH did take pictures. We got a couple of videos too, but those won't fit in my blog.
Okay....apparently the pictures are messing up my stuff, so I'll just post them in the photo gallery...
http://allnurses.com/gallery/browsei...ageuser=162979
Sigh. I don't even know what part of my blog disappeared! LOL! Short term memory loss | | A job...I think... | | Got a call on my way in to work this morning from a place I'd interviewed at and thought the interview (panel) had gone well. A week had passed and I hadn't heard anything and thought...oh well. I had really liked the idea of the job. Three 9's, 27hours a week, benefited. Leaving two days a week I could work per diem at the surgery center, thereby still seeing my friends and keeping my hand in in acute care.
So...call this morning. Loved me, unanimously wanted to offer the job to me. That was flattering. Then he asked when I could start...I said Monday. He said, oh, I thought maybe two or three weeks. I reminded him I was working per diem at the surgery center and had a flexible schedule. He hemmed and hawed and said well....we still need to do the background check, drug test, etc. I said, okay, when would you like me in for the drug test? He hemmed a little more. I'm not in the system yet, he just doesn't know. Sigh. The pay he quoted is nice, higher than they had ballparked at the interview.
This evening he calls again. He expects that they'll be ready to start me...November 30th. Hoo boy. Okay, glad to be aboard, etc etc etc. I can hang on financially that long, I could make it through January if I needed to. But it would have been nice to start a little sooner than that. Oh well.
And wouldn't you know it, NOW people are calling me for interviews, some of them very interesting positions. LOL...famine...or feast.
I am excited about the job. It's the one I'd wanted the most, because of the flexibility it offered me to work both places. And because the job itself sounded fun. | | A little of this, a little of that | | Fairly darn little. Getting a few hours at the surgery center. Yesterday was a good refresher, I was out in admitting and having to start IV's. Missed the first two. I start feeling like I'll never get them when I've missed two in a row. Then it came together and I was able to start all the rest. That was good, hadn't done much of that in the last two or three months.
Have another job interview in Portland tomorrow. Had a travel company call me yesterday, and they have lots of assignments in the big city. So that's an option too.
Some bug has gotten to my son, and now hubby. So far (cross fingers, toes, etc) I haven't gotten it. Or, I had it already and am immune. That'd work for me.
The leaves are falling fast now. Back yard is carpeted, even though we have a bi-monthly yard crew. I've had the fire in the fireplace on a couple of times. Love that ambiance, and the persian rug in front of the fire is soft. Nice place to sit and indulge in a little contemplation. | | Learned Optimism | | I can't remember if I've mentioned this subject before. Bummer getting older, that sharp shiny memory of mine is getting some dull spots on it.
Even if I have, it bears repeating. The quote came from a book of mine that I enjoy and read periodically by Jennifer Crusie and Bob Mayer. Optimism can be learned, and the gist of it (according to one character) is "contentment in the past, happiness in the present, and hope for the future."
I feel like I've got the second two nailed pretty well right now. It's the first one I tend to struggle with. Forgiveness is harder than I'd thought in some instances. And in dealing with my Mom...sigh...I'll think I've got it all settled down and handled, and she'll say or do something new to trigger all those feelings.
This time she spent a long time harping on how relationships with quick beginnings ALWAYS go bad. Keep in mind, my relationship with my hubby started quickly and progressed quickly and she knows that.
And so each time I think...I need to quit letting her dominate my thoughts...she pulls something like that. And here I am whining about her again. ARGH!
We went to my cousin's apple pressing party on Saturday. They have a wonderful place out in the woods. Twenty years ago they bought it and it was a little cabin, pretty much three rooms. A tiny bedroom, a bigger room, and a bathroom. Over the years they have built on, and I do mean THEY have built on. They built their own stone fireplace. The woodwork is fantastic. Everything handcrafted. They make their living building beautiful wood products, so it's no surprise, but it is a pleasure to see their place. They opted out of the mainstream long ago, and have lived much closer to the land. They make it look easy, though I know they have had times where they really struggled to keep their heads above water. We walked a trail to the little local river and the whole afternoon was so peaceful. (okay, except for my other cousin's great dane puppy who kept knocking things and people over in his joie de vivre.) | | Per Diem | | I finally got my check for the per diem night I worked at the surgery center. That was nice, it was over $8 an hour more than when I was working full time. It helps. I'm working three 'days' this week for them. All of them short shifts of about 5 hours. Doesn't keep the budget in the black, but it does extend how long I can go before compromising on a job.
Not much going on in the unworking world. Made bread. Bought some flannel sheets for the bed. That'll be nice tonight. Mother driving me crazy with her constant phone calls. She has stepped up the quantity, assuming that as I'm not working, I have the time to sit around and chat for HOURS with her. It wouldn't be so bad if she didn't make me feel so rotten every time I talk to her. Then I have to drag through the rest of the day...which isn't a good way to feel when job hunting.
I feel dull and boring...which is probably why I don't journal often. | | looking up? | | I had a job interview today. Panel interview again, but I had some warning going in, and I wasn't so blindsided and upset by it. I think I did well, it felt good. And the person showing me out said I did well. The only down that I could see is that it is every other weekend instead of every third. The one showing me out said there aren't any openings because of people leaving, the only openings they have are because they are adding on to the hospital and are hiring 22 new RN's over the course of the next six months.
Not only did I have this interview, but I got a call back on a job I really was interested in, to go in and talk next week, an email from a place doing per diem placements that was really excited by my resume, and a phone call from a headhunter. At least the phone is ringing! I was starting to wonder. Oh, and the surgery center may want me all next week, on of my buddies wants a week off. I'm wondering........she's just back from maternity leave with her second child. Maybe leaving two kids at home is harder than leaving one. Maybe....maybe....maybe she'll want to cut back?
Hubby is on his way down. Child is no longer sick, and I have given up two nights of my hubby time so that he wouldn't catch anything. I need to go wipe down the banisters etc before he gets here. LOL, I sound like I'm paranoid or something. Ah...the new age.... |
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