Quote from Mike RGN
Thought I would share this will you all, found on a web site some years age and it still makes me smile...
Reminds me of some of the old EMS chestnuts...
- If you are at an MVA (RTA) at 3am, and none of your patients is drunk, keep looking, someone is missing.
- When given the choice between the Blue & white taxi (police car) and the red & white taxi (ambulance), a drunk injured person will always choose the blue and the uninjured always choose the red.
- The closer a call comes to 3am, the more likely that it could wait until 10am when the Doctors Office opens.
- Children are very creative when it comes to combinations of orifices and foreign bodies.
- The more tools and gadgets a person has to have in their pockets, the less competent they likely are to use any of them.
- ALways heed the following 2 patient complaints without question: 1) The baby is coming now 2) I think I am going to be sick.
- The higher the floor a person lives on, the more likely they are to drag themselves up to their flat before calling an ambulance for a complaint for which they will need to be carried down stairs.
- Patients who say "I have no idea how THAT happened" always do.
- Always use tape to secure someone to a backboard- if they are faking or playing up, make sure the tape goes across their eyebrows. At least then you will be able to spot them more easily next time they call and make sure another crew gets them.
- Always ask people with acute respiratory distress and/or COPD to put out their cigarette before giving them oxygen.