You know you've been in Nursing TOO long when... - page 2

Thought I would share this will you all, found on a web site some years age and it still makes me smile, I used to put this in the New staff induction Pack it set the tone perfectly Discussion of... Read More

  1. by   Whisper
    youy've been in nursing too long when...
    you tell beeping machines to 'shut up'!
    I caught my self talking to a dynamap today, and my mentor talking to an alaris
  2. by   Mike RGN
    Quote from Whisper
    youy've been in nursing too long when...
    you tell beeping machines to 'shut up'!
    I caught my self talking to a dynamap today, and my mentor talking to an alaris

    Only worry if they talk back
  3. by   donmurray
    Dynamap? Alaris? and in my day any machines we had went ping! I'm not getting any younger!
  4. by   karenG
    Quote from donmurray
    Dynamap? Alaris? and in my day any machines we had went ping! I'm not getting any younger!

    I'm with you Don, havent a clue what she is talking about!

    Karen
  5. by   Whisper
    Quote from karenG
    I'm with you Don, havent a clue what she is talking about!

    Karen
    and it used to be me getting lost by the terminology
    a dynamap or dinamap is an electronic BP machine, which beeps when its battery is flat or when it can't get a reading or whenever it feels like it.

    the alaris I was reffering to is a syringe driver which doesn't only beep but plays a little tune.
  6. by   Good_Queen_Bess
    :chuckle
    OMG dynamaps! Do you find Whisper, that you are sat quiet and you hear "beep beep beep" and are bewildered as to what it is and you find it's the dynamap on the corridor somewhere beeping to itself for no apparant reason? Probably because it likes to hear the sound of it's own beep!
  7. by   Whisper
    OMG it isn't just me! I thought I was hearing things I often walk alaround the ward looking for the beep only to find it comming from the equipment cupboard or down a corridor... Guess I should really start looking there fist!
  8. by   karenG
    Quote from Whisper
    and it used to be me getting lost by the terminology
    a dynamap or dinamap is an electronic BP machine, which beeps when its battery is flat or when it can't get a reading or whenever it feels like it.

    the alaris I was reffering to is a syringe driver which doesn't only beep but plays a little tune.

    electronic BP machine wouldnt have a clue how to use one.. give me a mercury sphig any day!!! and syringe drivers....... even less of a clue!! guess I've been a nurse too long!!

    Karen
  9. by   Whisper
    I dread patients who require manual bp's, I am not that confident with a sphigometer and usually end up doing it twice just to be sure.

    Guess I haven't been a (student) nurse long enough!
  10. by   Charlootle
    I've only been a HCA 9 months on and Emergency Medical Assessment Unit and I start my Childrens Nursing in September but I've already stored up lots of these sayings!

    You've been a Nurse/HCA too long...

    When you can watch edam being suctioned out of somebodies mouth and then go eat exactly the same kind of cheese on crackers without squirming.

    Nothing puts you off your food.

    You need the toilet at the beginning of the shift and still need to go at the end.

    You've attached a sats probe to every possible part of someones body desperate to pick up a reading.

    Your alarm clock sounds like the emergency buzzer.

    You've ever crashed the crash trolley.

    You've restrained more people than you've had hot dinners.

    You enjoy tannoying people who don't answer their bleeps.

    You can smell what's wrong with a patient.

    Charlotte x
  11. by   elorra
    Quote from Whisper
    I dread patients who require manual bp's, I am not that confident with a sphigometer and usually end up doing it twice just to be sure.

    Guess I haven't been a (student) nurse long enough!
    Bless you Whisper, when I trained nearly 14 years ago we did not have the benefit or non of dinamaps and had to rely on manual sphygs, doing obs on a whole ward of 24+ patients on the late shift. It really is the best way of getting an accurate reading of a patient and staff have become too reliant on using machinery.
  12. by   VivaLasViejas
    You know you've been a nurse too long when:

    Cleaning up after a patient who's just had a massive code brown reminds you that you need to pick up some brownie mix at the store on the way home.

    You actually ENJOY watching your family members turn green as you describe something particularly gruesome that happened at work today.

    Your sense of humor combines the sophistication of grade-school toilet comedy with the cynicism of political punditry......and you're proud of it!

    You take pride in the fact that you know over 1,000 ways to describe sh**. :chuckle
  13. by   nursebedlam
    thanx for that, good laugh

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