Do your dying patient's have company? - page 2
It has been my experience that the dying are not alone. Unscientifically speaking, about 90% of the people I take care of tell me, near the end of their lives, that they've been visited by deceased... Read More
Mar 26, '03FLOWERS!! That reminds me of my first experience of someone dying on my shift. Her daughter had just left to go home to shower/change. The lady died. Then I could swear I smelled flowers! Still gives me shivers. Hasn't happened since...
Mar 26, '03I had a home health pt of mine state the day and time she was leaving. We were changing shifts and the aide I was relieving said Mrs B, Im going home now and Laura will take over. I will be back Sunday. This was about Thursday. She thanked the girl for taking such good care of her and said After Saturday I wont need you anymore. I was off Saturday and was thinking of what she said. At 8:00 pm the on call supervisor from my agency called and said Mrs B has passed way. I told the gal what she had told the aides as to her time/ day of passing as she was really spooked.
Mar 26, '03Hellllllo Nurse, I'd like to read your story, too.
I absolutely believe that people get help when it's time to go. Especially if they're having a hard time of it.
And I've heard some stories, and read some on this board that give me such a feeling of peace. Interestingly, and I know I've posted this before, and I know it doesn't PROVE anything, but you never hear these people who are about to die talking to somebody who is alive and just distant... I even remember reading on another thread on this BB about a patient who talked to someone he/she didn't even know had died!
Mar 29, '03Thank-you all for sharing. Nov. 14/02 lost my mother. Early hours in a.m. nurses called saying she wanted me. My brother had just left and a dear family friend stayed at her bedside until we could be back in the a.m. Went in for a UTI infection (end stage heart disease), day before, my brother thought she was hallucinating because she would point and say "don't you see grandam, arty." From you all sharing, I know that everyone was there to great her for her next journey. It is heartbreaking to lose a parent but the last 2 yrs. of her life she was not living and to have known my mother, Life is living. I know she is at rest. I will not forget her words, "don't ever be afraid of the dead, it is the living that can hurt you." Thanks for sharing. I really appreciate it.
Jun 3, '03My GM passed on a few years ago and right before she passed she began talking about people who had already died. I do believe she was teetering over to the other side.
Jun 3, '03My mum sat up in bed, looked down the ward, and said "It's me dad!". I know my grandad had come for her. She passed away 48 hours later. I'll never forget that.
Jun 3, '03Great thread, great stories...
Though he wasn't a hospice patient, my dad was in ICU in Feb. 2003 w/ COPD exacerbation. He's nearing end-stage, but had never been intubated. He was doing really poorly, but the doctors felt he was as good as he was going to get so they extubated him. He was really confused, agitated and combative. He didn't even recognize us (his family). As a nurse, I was pretty used to this, but it's a different story when it's your loved one. I wan't too freaked out until he started talking about his dead sister...his condition quickly deteriorated and he had to be reintubated. Though he was on tons of sedation, he was still agitated and combative. I just kept telling him over and over that if he needed to go, it was alright. We loved him and we understood.
To the shock and amazement of our family and the staff, he pulled through. Doesn't remember any of his month long hospital stay until the last few days when he finally was lucid. I truly believe he was walking the line between this world and and the after-world...either that or that was some yummy propofol, morphine, ativan and versed he got!
Jul 20, '03I am a firm believer that we have company when we pass away. When my dad died five years ago, I was asleep next to him on his bed, and I suddenly woke up at 1:15am and could see that he had just passed. I swear I felt a holy presence in that room. That feeling didn't last long, but when he went, I know angels were with him. I immediately thanked God for taking him (he had been suffering for way too long), but then I broke down and cried for my loss. Anyway, because of that experience, I am not afraid when it becomes my time to go.:kiss
Jul 21, '03I had conversations with two clients we did CPR on during a code. They both said they heard this and that and were up in the corner watching the activity. They said they felt great peace until the reunited with their body and at that point had horrible pain from the trauma their bodies had just gone through.
Yes I do believe and have heard from clients of seeing other people when the time to die is near.
Jul 21, '03I've had quite a lot of dying patients who have had "visitations" of one sort or another but a couple will always stick in my mind.
One was an elderly lady and I cared for her dying son-in-law with whom she lived. She developed pancreatic CA a few months after he died and I was back in the home to care for her. Days before she died she began talking about a cat that she loved (it had died many years ago) and she would stroke and talk to her ghost kitty. We had to transfer her to a nursing home during her last day or two of life and she instructed the EMTs to be careful of her cat (lying in bed with her) and bless them, they took great care with a cat they couldn't see!
One day I found another lovely woman who struggled a lot with letting go and dying sitting up in bed looking just radiant and not at all confused. She informed me that the angels had been to visit her and told her the meaning of life. (Said with much excitement and glee). Since I haven't actually figured out the meaning of life, I was quite interested in the answer! Then she said, Our only job on earth is to love each other. She marveled at that and told me of struggles she'd had and how none of it mattered. She was almost giddily happy for the additional 3 or 4 days that she lived and she never tired of discussing her heavenly messengers. I'll never forget it as long as I live.
Jul 21, '03PeggySue
I've felt that present in a room following a death. I feel privledged to have had that experience. I have talked to alot of coworkers and most have never felt it. It's a very peaceful feeling. I haven't felt it in years.
I'm starting to think I've turned too hard to feel it. It's sad to be a hardened nurse.