I need to vent.
I work in home care for a medically fragile child. I love it. I love the family and the staff. We do not clock in and out. We simply write our times on our notes and they must line up with the other nurses since they won't pay two of us at once.
The main day shift nurse and I have bonded and I really like her as a person. She is an excellent nurse. We are in the same RN program and I gave her all my study material and videos I bought for $300. I truly like her and I want her to succeed.
However, she chronically shows up 15-60 min late day after day. The family has asked me more than once to "cut her some slack." She's a single mom. The previous night nurse even went as far as to not document her proper times and didn't get paid for the extra time she was here covering. I refused to do that.
Ok, I'm not a heartless person. I get it, she's trying to get her kids to school. And if it's once in a while, fine. Anytime I bring it up that I am not ok with constantly staying over *everyone* says, "yeah but she has kids."
Why is my time less valuable than someone with kids? She can come and go as she pleases? She can't be the first nurse in history to have to get her kids on the bus before work.
Also, I am working 14 hour shifts for the next two months because she has to leave 2 hours early to get her kids from daycare.
I complained to my job and they talked to her about making her shift start later so that she could get to work on time. I am fine with that if it's scheduled. She didn't want that. But yesterday she showed up 70 MIN LATE. She didn't even text me until she was 40 min late to say she's be there soon.
So, I came in at 5pm stayed until 9am because of her tardiness, then had to come back in at 5pm to do it all over again!
I really like her, and I don't want to ruin a nursing friendship especially with someone I see so often. Im not a fan of awkward shift reports.
I don't know what to do. If I report her, I look like a child hating jerk. If I don't I have to accept that I'm getting walked all over because my life is somewhat less because I'm not a Mother. She's putting me in such an awkward position! I feel like I can't win!
Any advice is welcome!
Nov 2, '16
by nursel56 Guide
I've worked with many responsible mothers who keep their agreements, so the "she has kids" excuse is a total crock.
Having been fed-up by similar situations in the past, I can say that there is a mindset among most well-meaning and caring nurses that creeps up gradually. You start feeling guilty about things that were never your responsibility in the first place. You become easy prey for the selfish users and manipulators.
I know. I've been there, too. It (usually) gets worse. The more you give, the more they'll take.
For the rest, I agree with JustBeachyNurse. Don't allow anyone to tell you doing something illegal or unethical is OK. When you leave a job like that, knowing you never compromised your values could be the only thing you still have.
Wishing you the best!
Last edit by nursel56 on Nov 2, '16