Work related depression

  1. 9 Yet another post about stress and work related depression... I burned out on bedside nursing and now I am burning out in my new non bedside position. I feel trapped in my job. I am the sole breadwinner, and my family depends on a certain level of income.Yes, I know I am very lucky to be working, but I am becoming more anxious and depressed all the time. I can't stand the workload/environment. My job stress is beginning to affect my family life. I already saw my doctor about the stress/depression...but in the meanwhile I am stuck in a stressful job because of my financial obligations.

    I have been trying to find a new job somewhere else. But even an experienced RN can't move into other specialties. The myth about all the options you have as an RN does not apply nowadays. Other specialties want you to already have tons of experience in their specialty, but are not willing to train you. You really can't move around easily.There are a million RNs applying for jobs. It is so depressing. I feel I will be trapped here forever.I guess I just wanted to vent. I don't mean to be a downer, but no one else understands. I know some of you will. I have kids, a husband, and a mortgage to pay for. I feel like I have no where to go, and that the heavy burdens will never let up. I just want out. But I can't find that way out.

    Thanks for reading.
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  3. Visit  Genista profile page

    About Genista

    From 'On the road'; Joined Nov '99; Posts: 831; Likes: 152.

    30 Comments so far...

  4. Visit  Marshall1 profile page
    5
    I have no advice & I don't have kids but everything else you posted I completely identify with. Completely. I left bedside nursing a few years ago - for a variety of reasons &, for a few more, am facing going back after the first of the year & am already - weeks out from the job - getting depressed/anxious about it. I have told them I cannot take a FT position - if I can work PRN it would make me feel better in the sense I have some control over how often I would work. I have a few other options brewing - at least one is for sure - which is in home health but it's a per visit pay not hourly so I am concerned I will not make enough to supplement my spouses income & the majority of the posts are here are negative about how much time off duty the work demands. I've entertained a M-F type job but my spouse works shifts so if I did work a M-F deal it would greatly impact us seeing each other. He isn't in a field that is as flexible as nursing in that sense. We do NOT live "high on the hog" - we have a car payment, mortgage and that's it but his salary, while consistent, is low. Relocation is not an option - houses aren't selling & the cost of going somewhere else to start over is not worth it. A degree is nursing boxes you in & like you said, the opportunities are not out there like people think - & those that are want tons of experience, certifications or higher degrees & even with those it's not remotely a for sure deal. I honestly don't see how a new grad can make it.
    I too have seen a doctor..mine feels strongly that an antidepressant would be of great benefit as I've struggled for sometime w/anxiety/depression w/the majority of it being work related. I'm on the fence about medication.
    At this point I am waiting to hear back about going to the hospital PRN..if I can then most likely I will decline the PT HH position & just keep an eye out for something else. Like you, I am grateful for the opportunity to work but I wonder if the "golden days" for nursing are over. I'd love to get out of nursing altogether but that isn't an option - at least not now.
    Feel free to PM me if you need to vent more. You are definitely not alone in how you feel.
    Genista, biggirl11, RxOnly, and 2 others like this.
  5. Visit  VivaLasViejas profile page
    11
    I could have written your post, OP; the only major differences being that all my kids are grown (although I do have an unemployed Iraq War vet living on my sofa right now) and I have bipolar disorder. I'm the sole support for four people and wonder just how much longer I'm going to be able to take the constant stress. I love my job, but there is SO much responsibility and sometimes I am just too unstable to handle it well.

    I'm currently in a depressive episode, but ironically I do better at work when I'm like this than I do when I'm manic, despite all the extra energy and over-optimism. At least I'm quiet, and stay in my office most of the time where I actually get some work done. Besides, I'm pushing 55 and know that my options for other nursing jobs with an ADN are very limited, and I'm neither willing nor able to tackle organic chemistry and statistics at this time of my life. So I stick with my 50-hour weeks and thank God I'm employed, and that I have the greatest boss on the planet who knows when I'm overwhelmed and need a mental-health day.
    DSkelton711, Genista, TaniqueRN, and 8 others like this.
  6. Visit  FLmed profile page
    7
    I just wanted you to know that I read your post and I care!! I'm so sorry you are going through this. Wish I had some advice for you. Sending you hugs and just wanted you to extend a listening ear anytime. Please feel free to PM me.
    Genista, anotherone, merlee, and 4 others like this.
  7. Visit  FLmed profile page
    4
    Quote from Marshall1
    I have no advice & I don't have kids but everything else you posted I completely identify with. Completely. I left bedside nursing a few years ago - for a variety of reasons &, for a few more, am facing going back after the first of the year & am already - weeks out from the job - getting depressed/anxious about it. I have told them I cannot take a FT position - if I can work PRN it would make me feel better in the sense I have some control over how often I would work. I have a few other options brewing - at least one is for sure - which is in home health but it's a per visit pay not hourly so I am concerned I will not make enough to supplement my spouses income & the majority of the posts are here are negative about how much time off duty the work demands. I've entertained a M-F type job but my spouse works shifts so if I did work a M-F deal it would greatly impact us seeing each other. He isn't in a field that is as flexible as nursing in that sense. We do NOT live "high on the hog" - we have a car payment, mortgage and that's it but his salary, while consistent, is low. Relocation is not an option - houses aren't selling & the cost of going somewhere else to start over is not worth it. A degree is nursing boxes you in & like you said, the opportunities are not out there like people think - & those that are want tons of experience, certifications or higher degrees & even with those it's not remotely a for sure deal. I honestly don't see how a new grad can make it.
    I too have seen a doctor..mine feels strongly that an antidepressant would be of great benefit as I've struggled for sometime w/anxiety/depression w/the majority of it being work related. I'm on the fence about medication.
    At this point I am waiting to hear back about going to the hospital PRN..if I can then most likely I will decline the PT HH position & just keep an eye out for something else. Like you, I am grateful for the opportunity to work but I wonder if the "golden days" for nursing are over. I'd love to get out of nursing altogether but that isn't an option - at least not now.
    Feel free to PM me if you need to vent more. You are definitely not alone in how you feel.
    PRN can be a good option. As you mentioned it gives you more control. One of my friends who works PRN gets called in just about every day, and she just tells them NO! Her commitment to her hospital is 2 days a week. And OP-- you are definitely not alone. It certainly helps to connect with people who understand. People who are not nurses will never get it-- ever.
    Genista, VivaLasViejas, nrsang97, and 1 other like this.
  8. Visit  08RNGrad profile page
    3
    I left the bedside for a non-patient care role a few years ago. My first two jobs were HIGH paying but so stressful. Now, I've finally found my nitch. Still non-patient care, a little less paying (still pays more than bedside nursing), but not as stressful. When work is stressful, it totally seeps into my personal life. One of my biggest flaws is that I do not compartmentalize well. Have you looked into any other options? Wish you the best. What about research or sales? Best of luck!!
    Genista, Marshall1, and VivaLasViejas like this.
  9. Visit  OnlybyHisgraceRN profile page
    3
    Try teaching CNA school or other classes, or school nursing. My mother tried teaching and loves it. There may be a short course you have to take but it may be worth it. I personally enjoy school nursing.
    Sorry you feel this way. I have been there and should I will go there again throughout my nursing career. We are here to support you.
    Genista, anotherone, and VivaLasViejas like this.
  10. Visit  NRSKarenRN profile page
    3
    Most facilities have an Employee Assistance Program(EAP). They are very helpful in dealing with work life balances and job related stress, most have a 24/7 call center.
    Nurses under utilize this benefit. Please check you benefit booklet/online HR resources and make a call. If you work for a small employeer, then discuss your concerns with your PCP-- short term counseling and or medications can make a world of difference. My staff often thank me when I recommend EAP to them.
    Genista, itsmejuli, and VivaLasViejas like this.
  11. Visit  NurseCard profile page
    7
    I too could have written that first post, except I'm still at the bedside. If I did not have a family to support, I think I'd quit nursing altogether to go live in a loft, make paintings all day, and work at Starbucks in the evening. And I'm pushing 40.

    I do wish I could find something less stressful but at the time being, I'm pretty well stuck.
    LTCNS, Genista, VivaLasViejas, and 4 others like this.
  12. Visit  RxOnly profile page
    7
    Quote from NurseCard
    I too could have written that first post, except I'm still at the bedside. If I did not have a family to support, I think I'd quit nursing altogether to go live in a loft, make paintings all day, and work at Starbucks in the evening. And I'm pushing 40.

    I do wish I could find something less stressful but at the time being, I'm pretty well stuck.

    I literally almost quit my FT nursing job at detox to work at Starbucks. Only reason I didn't is because the other interviewee had food service experience and she got hired over me!
    Luckily I've moved onto a M-F Internal Med clinic job which is fine for now, but If I could do it all again I'd have stayed away from nursing.
    sistasoul, DSkelton711, Genista, and 4 others like this.
  13. Visit  joanna73 profile page
    7
    I'm sure many of us have felt this way at one time. I've been a nurse for 2 years, and some days I wonder if I shouldn't have pursued a physio degree or some other related field. I enjoy nursing and helping others, in addition to the ongoing learning. The running around, under staffing, missing breaks, and work place politics I do not enjoy. Sometimes the negatives outweigh the positives. As a result, I've decided to train for another specialty, reduce my hours, and change jobs in the new year. The key to avoiding burnout is knowing your limits and embracing change.
    LTCNS, anotherone, poppycat, and 4 others like this.
  14. Visit  gloryfied profile page
    3
    Hun, I share with you the depression and feeling stuck. I feel the same way, and I want to move and get out of here and nursing too, but I dont even know what to do. My only strength is the Lord. Truthfully. I feel like Im working and time is passing me by,, but I pray he doubles everything. Same for you.I hope things get better, because when you loose your self in work and not connecting with anything anymore, it becomes difficult.
    LTCNS, Genista, and VivaLasViejas like this.
  15. Visit  MotherRN profile page
    5
    One bit of good news- if you do want to go for the RN-BSN, there are schools, even good ones that DON"T require the organic chemistry. I, too, though I would need that. Turns out, I don't. So, this fall I can begin my BSN online and not have to worry about it. At least it's one thing less.

    Oh! I also have an Iraq war vet living in my house these days! He was able to find a seasonal position at Wally World just this very week. It may only last a month, but he gets to sell GUNS in sporting goods, so he's very happy. I'm relieved to see him up every day, off the computer and doing something to lift his spirits.

    Even with a BA degree and military intelligence background, jobs are non-existent for him in his field. The pay he earned over there is dwindling and he needs to bring something, anything, in to cover his basics.

    I am blessed not to be the sole breadwinner. However, I do have one angry spouse with hands on hips, foot tapping, wanting to see the financial pay off from all those loans I took to get the ADN degree! He's been underemployed since his heart attack. We are paycheck to paycheck.

    I understand his frustration. But, I also know I have to work safely as a nurse (don't want to kill anyone and I really not looking to wear an orange jumpsuit anytime soon). Round One of PRN nursing in LTC did not go smoothly. I've been licking my wounds, trying to get up my nerve to try again. Now that my semester of prereqs for BSN is over, I plan to address my self-evaluated deficits in nursing knowledge (pharmacology, narrative documentation, and basic procedures they didn't teach in school but thankfully YouTube videos do!).

    I have been subbing as a school nurse this last month. Talk about a breath of fresh air!!! My own office, get to sit down, in an actual chair, document in piece, actually eat lunch, and, for me, the real bonus... NO CNA's!!! (I know that comes off offensive and I know there are really good one's out there, but I have really good personal reasons for feeling that way right now!). The pay is low, but it''s twice a month and through the summer, even though you are off. Plus every weekend, evening and holidays off as well. As a supplement to the sole breadwinner salary, it might be the way to go, if I can get the job. Just think they are hard to come by. Today I was at the alternative school for the juvenile deliquents. Even though I had to go toe to toe with a thirteen year old over his insulin, it was way better than my LTC position. Just saying.

    In the new year, and because I don't have the school nurse position yet, I will look for PRN LTC/hospital work. I, too, think that PRN would make me feel less trapped by the job and more in control. Even though I was hired PRN at the last place, they told me a week in I was part time, but then worked me like full time until it all ended abruptly. I would prefer the PRN- 2-3 days a week or every other weekend something like that so I could study and look into other types of nursing.

    I'm sorry for the depression people feel. I night before I was fired, I thought to myself how I wasn't doing anything well in my life-not taking proper care of the kids, the house, or even the patients because there wasn't enough time to do it all no matter where I was and what I was doing at the time.

    I definitely understand your feelings!
    anotherone, Genista, joanna73, and 2 others like this.


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