Insight will be appreciated.
Thank you in advance.
19 MONTHS working on a medsurg unit, night shift. no sleep non whatsoever. atleast 3 hours a day, then go to work that night, sleep deprived and tired. I have come to learn that I really endure alot, even when I am suffering inside, because I deeply am. Mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually( yes), socially.
Mentally, Im lost. Plain. Simple. Lost. No idea who I am now, but know for sure who I ws before, and can't get her back.
Emotionally: Sleepless, no family in sight, (moved 6 hours away for experience). Huge lack of culture here. No one to come home to. Im 24.y.o. good looking, and feel like ****, because of the lack of sleep part.
Physically: Night shift, 3 hours a day of sleep, work nights, sleep deprived, no energy,. (Because I endure everything, I maintained working out 5 out of those 7 days a week the whole 19month (still doing it), to continue myself in great shape)
Spiritually: My church is 1.5 hours away, a church I went to when i was away at school. my 2nd home church to my actual 1st home church back at home. To get off work at 7am to try to get to church by 10, with a 1.5 hour drive, my body at this point cant carry me on such trips.
Final: Im ready to quit this job of unacknowedgement, and loss of drive and go home. I. Need. To. My mental health is spiralling, I am a zombie, generic and sleep deprived.
I have endured so much that I don't even give myself the much deserved credit. Everyone else has their family here, and they still complain, me, no family, no one to relate to, and I stick through.
I have no job lined up yet, the thought of needing to before quitting, makes me want to decide to just not work again.
I know it's best to secure a job first before leaving, is it that bad to find another job jobless.
I. Just. Don't. Know. How. Much. More. I. Can .Take
planned to leave in March, stuck it out for more experience, I just cant keep on here no more. my body, spirit/ soul and mind has grown weary.
Help, Advice .Please.