I've been thinking a lot lately, and I think I may be depressed.
I feel so sad lately, all of the time in fact. I do nothing on my days off but lay around, thinking about how much I hate my job. I get upset at really dumb things and cry like a 3 year old. I never see my friends anymore because the schedule SUCKS. And when I do, they all seem so disappointed that I hate being a nurse (I don't know why I'm the only one who doesn't have a right to hate their job?) I feel so bad for my wonderful hubby because I'm so miserable to be around these days.
I hate feeling this way. I was never even close to this unhappy before. Nursing is truly ruining my life. But I have to do it because I have to pay bills.
I certainly never think about harming myself in any way, and I always try to give 100% effort at work... but I worry that one day I'll just up and quit my job because I hate it so much.
then again, maybe that would fix it...
thanks for listening.
Sep 8, '12
Sorry to hear you're having a tough time... depression sucks the life out of you!
I think that sometimes change can put us into a long, drawn out funk. Anyway, what kind of nursing do you do? Any chance you could try a different specialty or see if your employer has an EAP program? They might be able to help.
Sep 9, '12
You sound like me. I've been doing this for almost 3 years now. Sometimes I wonder how I ever made it this far. The truth is, nursing is stressful. We are constantly being pushed and have to sacrifice our health all the time. When I signed up for nursing No one explained this. I have had to take breaks often just to continue. At one point I hated nursing so much that I almost suffered a mental breakdown. I developed severe anxiety and depression. Luckliy, I had friends who recognized the symptoms and pushed me to go get help. So far, I've been doing clinics and currently searching for positions outside of the hospital. The agencies I used to work with are constantly pestering me to go back to work on the floor and I keep saying no. Maybe, you should look for non-traditional jobs? You could do school nursing, teach for Kaplan, Doctor's office etc., I don't believe you hate nursing. You probably hate your job.Also, I ended up doing an assignment this summer at a radiology clinic and it was great!Your words just sounded like me a few months ago. I know you have bills, but can you take few days off to go somewhere with your hubby?All the best to you.Keep us Posted.
Sep 9, '12
Take advantage of the EAP program if you have one. Talk to a therapist and figure out what it is that is stressing you out at work.
I can't do floor nursing, its much too stressful for me. I like patient continuity, so I'm working in an ALF type setting and love it.
Sep 9, '12
Make an appointment with your PCP and get a referral to a counselor, and, as the other poster stated, take advantage of an EAP program if your employer provides one. Tomorrow. Don't put it off ma'am! ASAP!
I hope you start feeling better soon.
Sep 9, '12
Sounds like you need more help than the membership here at allnurses.com can offer. If your employer offers an EAP, make the call. Generally speaking this is a no cost service, confidential (unless you reveal that you want to harm yourself or others), and usually covers 3 sessions with a licensed professional (psychologist, psychiatrist, professional counselor, LCSW, etc.)
You can also try contacting your primary care physician for a referral to a counselor. Most counties/states have mental health hotlines or warm lines that can lend an ear and offer referrals to counseling services in your area.
If you are that miserable in your current job, perhaps a change is in order. Brush up your resume, start looking for employment elsewhere this when when you know it's time to go you have something waiting in the wings.
Must Read Topics