What's your problem???????

  1. For the past 2 shifts Ive worked Ive gotten a really bad vibe from an aide. Im not for sure why exactly...but a few weeks ago the day nurse had asked me if we had ever had problems from her...the aide has the WORST attitude Ive ever seen. She wasnt like that at first but shes turned into a monster. She has caused alot of trouble, she tries to watch aides and nurses and tells on them for things that usually arent true...she makes alot of assumptions but rarely if ever has a known fact. Shes not a team player. Shes sneaky. ive seen her watching me before. She's had numerous complaints from patients that are with it and can name her by name..she threw linen at one of the patients and nothing was done...they keep putting her right back on the unit that has complained about her being hateful, rude, mean etc. to them. Anyway, a nurse reported it on day shift. I stayed out of it because I havent witnessed anything with my own eyes/ears. What that nurse told me happened on her shift, not mine. The nurse had told me in report about it and that she was going to say something..well....now...this aide looks at me like she could rip me in half every time I go to work...she wont speak to me which is good but when I say hello i think its only courteous to say something nice back., she rolls her eyes at me, ignores me when I ask her for my vitals or my outputs, in fact...last time she didnt give my vitals to me..she gave them to the day nurse to give to me....the very nurse that in fact reported her! I think she may have had something said to her by the powers that be and thinks I reported her. I jut dont appreciate it. i have done nothing to her. She would be more suitable to work on a construction crew diggng holes and laying pipes in 4 foot ditches or something. The attitude has got to go! have you ever been around someone who just made you feel so uneasy? When Im around her, I immediately get a deep seeded bad gut feeling about her...like there is something pure evil about her...and Im serious when I say evil. Put it this way, when shes near me, I feel like satan himself is next to me in the form of a female!!!!! Demonic is the only other way I can describe her.I just avoid her if possible but they keep putting her on my units and wont switch me to the other one.
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  2. 23 Comments

  3. by   Doc Lori, R.N.
    Hmm...Ms. Thang sounds like she's got a big chip on her shoulder and poor social skills! Personally, I'd keep my head high. You aren't there to please her. And of course, if you 2 are assigned together for a team in the future, it's all business. Any probs...insubordination. Truth is, poor thing probably has personal issues going on and needs a hug. That's no way to behave, however.

    Hang in there
  4. by   Intern67
    Quote from sasha2lady
    For the past 2 shifts Ive worked Ive gotten a really bad vibe from an aide.
    In my old LTC facility, the aides absolutely run the place. They live by their own rules and to heck with standards of care, patient rights, scope of practice or any other term you can gin up. Management at that facility is concerned only with profits and could care less.

    Everyone once in a while, some horrific tale of aides abusing people hits the papers. People say, "How can this happen?" and the answer is that the aides believe there is no authority above them.

    In some LTC facilities, they are correct.
  5. by   nohika
    Quote from Intern67
    In my old LTC facility, the aides absolutely run the place. They live by their own rules and to heck with standards of care, patient rights, scope of practice or any other term you can gin up. Management at that facility is concerned only with profits and could care less.

    Everyone once in a while, some horrific tale of aides abusing people hits the papers. People say, "How can this happen?" and the answer is that the aides believe there is no authority above them.

    In some LTC facilities, they are correct.
    ...y'know, it's aides like this that give all of us a bad name. I've only been an aide a couple weeks and I am starting to count down the time until I can quit. Politics (from aides AND nurses) are disgusting. Aides only run the place because GOD FORBID you ask a nurse to help you change a resident - it's almost funny to see the horror on their face. Well...I guess my definition of this is different than yours, probably.

    And please stop generalizing about how we "don't think there's authority above us". That's not all of us.

    I'm lucky I work nights and have about half good-coworkers, but...days and evenings don't quite have that.
  6. by   caliotter3
    I got the uncanny feeling reading your post that this person is exhibiting signs of acute mental illness, and I am by no stretch of the imagination, an expert in mental health.
  7. by   annabeap
    There's been a few slow-to-warm-up aides on my unit. But I haven't noticed any "evil" vibes. I was an aide first, so that experience gives me so much more appreciation for them. It's totally unit specific though. I think we just have a great group.

    Well, her name is already known by the nursing supervisor, so she's on their radar. All I can suggest is keep providing excellent patient care and be professional. If you're brave, you could try and approach her about it- maybe with the nurse supervisor even.
  8. by   Davey Do
    As if you don't already have enough to deal with, sasha2lady! Co-workers can really make the difference in the workplace. They can make a tolerable situation hellish and visa versa. Sometimes, as in your case, co-workers can be just about the hardest part of our jobs.

    Doc Lori made a reference to your work being "all business". When it all comes down to the bottom line, that's what our jobs are. Bummer. Our work has the potential to be fulfilling and rewarding. It just takes one fly in the ointment to spoil the whole mixture.

    At times like this, I think of the words of Edgar Caycee: "You can't getgetsomebody in more trouble then they can get themselves into." This concept has buoyed me on in similar situations and the outcome has always been the same.

    Of course, I may have acted as a catalyst in the situation by driving a nail or two into their coffin, but it was always they who drove the final nail.

    If the co-worker is insubordinate and not fulfilling their assigned duties, they need to have to deal with the ramifications of their actions. Or inactions.

    It doesn't matter how you FEEL about her. Whether you dislike her or love her intensely, put principles above personalities.

    Good luck to you, sasha2lady.
    Last edit by Davey Do on Jun 25, '10 : Reason: a darn misspelling!
  9. by   eerobb
    We have problems like this on the floor that I work on. It is a tele floor, and is very hard to keep care partners satisfied on... so it seems like they keep any help they can get. It is so frustrating, and hard to watch when you know patients deserve better. The best thing you can do is to kill her with kindness, because at some point or another you may be assigned to work on a team with her in the near future. Alot of times it seems that there is some other underlying issue when things like this happen, and you have to realize that it is not your fault but you do not want to contribute to the problem. Do your best for your patients, and don't let her negative attitude infect you. Good luck, this is tough!
  10. by   lifelearningrn
    I believe some people to be total soul suckers.. this woman sounds like she is one of those people.
  11. by   happy2learn
    Well girl, if you feel a "demonic" vibe from her, it's time to say your prayers for her. For me, praying for people like this is the only way I can deal with them. It's hard to not get mad at her, however, clearly there is an issue in her life. She isn't handling it the right way, but this could be her way of crying out for help. I find that praying for someone like this focuses the attention off of how I am feeling and helps me put myself in their shoes for a moment, which helps me clear my head and relieves some of the stress/anger. Who knows if she is really possessed or whatever, but something isn't right and clearly she needs help.

    Keep your head high, keep a smile on your face. The only way to beat the devil is with God on your side.

    Maybe you can approach her every day and simply ask, "How are you doing today? Is anything bothering you that you need to talk about? Because you seem upset about something...." She probably won't answer, or won't answer in the way you want, or she'll get even more mad, but you are acknowledging the fact that she has issues that are showing on her face. It needs to be addressed in some way.
  12. by   sasha2lady
    I believe so too....I asked for her to be moved one time...or we would have been together 3x thus far.
    I try to avoid her. When she is there she even walks toward me like she wants a conflict, Ive seen her do that to others also.
    I always look forward to seeing the night shift aides come in, its like when I see them its a relief because I know she will be gone.
    I dont understand how somebody who is so bitter can work in this field?
    I always hear her making comments about nurses & how we dont do this or that for the aides...the deal with that is...Im not above it ( I was an aide for 6 yrs) but I have more on my plate than I can juggle as it is and I absolutely will NOT do the aides work while they sit at the desk on the phone or texting or sit in a room hoping that someone will do it for them...Im not saying all are like this but the specific group I deal with is more or less this way.
    Ive seen alot of good ones come and get run off by the bad ones.
    I try to stay polite to all my coworkers even when they arent.
    Her behavior has been addressed before by mgmt but she returned to her old ways within a few weeks after she wasnt on the radar.
    I dont even know how I could find the time to try to be so sneaky and conniving to people. seems like a waste to me.
  13. by   shiccy
    We had an aid that was toxic like this and wouldn't grow up and act like an adult. She came INTO our floor with experience on another, and immediately had an attitude that just wouldn't quit. We ended up reporting her attitude to the supervisors, and eventually she was reported to our floor manager. She eventually quit because instead of her watching US do OUR job, WE watched HER do HER job. We made sure our I&O were done by her (she was NOTORIOUS for not emptying foleys, and thus didn't have to chart them. I didn't realize she was doing this until I had to empty 4/4 patients foleys, and since they weren't emptied at MN, they were two or three trips a piece by 4am when I was finally able to tally the I&O's). We wrote up everything she didn't do and made her toxic attitude backfire on her. FWIW we *DID* confront this lady, and she literally told me to do whatever task I had asked her to do myself.

    If I noticed a person watching me like that, please believe I'd be delegating a LOT more to her. If she has enough time to be a backstabbing b***h, then she has enough time to go do something else.

    I'm a huge proponent of directly confronting her about it. It's the hardest thing to do, IMHO, but if you're at the point where you've had enough, enough's enough and you've got to do something.

    As far as attitudes go, I also think writing incident reports is the way to go. If it's just bad blood between you, and nothing is being said at ALL, then you're not goign to be able to do much as far as incident reports, but you can at least write things up as far as her not giving you vitals for the patients, and instead giving it to the other RN. That's BS, stupid, and childish.

    For some reason people get into this field for the wrong reasons, and when they realize that being an aid or a nurse is actually pretty hard work, they get attitudes about it b/c they don't REALLY want to be there.

    Like I said - confront her, preferably behind a closed door (W/OUT PATIENTS / FAMILY, but also with a witness close by), and straight call her out on what she's doing. If she's not doing job expectations, and you aren't a type to write incident reports, GREAT... tell her that! "You know it's your job to tell me what my vitals are after you're done getting them either via charting them in their appropriate box or handing them to me directly. If you don't fulfill this duty in the future, I'm going to write an incident report that you're not fulfilling your contractual duties as per outlined on our floor and facility, and I will turn that into our director." If it's the attitude you want to tackle, I'd do it a bit more tactfully (read: NO use of "you, you're"). Something along the lines of, "I've noticed that we both have a failure to communicate effectively, and I'm trying figure out what the heck is going on or where the issue is. What's going on? Why am I getting attitude constantly?"

    Finally good luck.
  14. by   Doc Lori, R.N.
    Quote from Davey Do
    As if you don't already have enough to deal with, sasha2lady! Co-workers can really make the difference in the workplace. They can make a tolerable situation hellish and visa versa. Sometimes, as in your case, co-workers can be just about the hardest part of our jobs.

    Doc Lori made a reference to your work being "all business". When it all comes down to the bottom line, that's what our jobs are. Bummer. Our work has the potential to be fulfilling and rewarding. It just takes one fly in the ointment to spoil the whole mixture.

    At times like this, I think of the words of Edgar Caycee: "You can't getgetsomebody in more trouble then they can get themselves into." This concept has buoyed me on in similar situations and the outcome has always been the same.

    Of course, I may have acted as a catalyst in the situation by driving a nail or two into their coffin, but it was always they who drove the final nail.

    If the co-worker is insubordinate and not fulfilling their assigned duties, they need to have to deal with the ramifications of their actions. Or inactions.

    It doesn't matter how you FEEL about her. Whether you dislike her or love her intensely, put principles above personalities.

    Good luck to you, sasha2lady.
    Nicely stated, Davey Do.

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