What would you do?

  1. I have a male resident that had an indwelling cath due to issues of not being able to void and when he was straight cathed, he had an out of at least 900cc... As I was cleaning him off after removal of the cath, he said to me, as I was cleaning his privates, "Gee, I hope you take care of your husband as well as you take care of me." Didn't think much of it at the time, but later, he called me back in there and was "milking" his penis from sack to tip and asked me if I would wipe it off. I got a little freaked out when I went to wipe him with my gloved hands and his penis was semi erect! Now normally that wouldn't bug me, but it really bothered me!

    Today, he said that he couldn't go and wanted to be "drained" again! I told him that I would have the male nurse that was on do it, since I was in the middle of doing some other things that needed my attention. He got a little upset about it and said to me, "I would prefer a woman would do it, they are much daintyier about doing something like that." After that, I was very freaked out!!!!!!!!! This man has been found fondling himself, and is of right mind, but I'm not going to tolerate those kinds of comments. The male nurse would have done the cath, but the man refused to let him do it!

    I want to refuse to "cath" him, but not sure that I can. I am not comfortable with doing that, even when I take someone else in with me!

    What should I do?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?:imbar
    •  
  2. 14 Comments

  3. by   RN and Mommy
    I would start by telling him that his comments and actions are inappropriate.
  4. by   HappyJaxRN
    You need to let your supervisor know what's going on. Someone needs to talk to him and it shouldn't have to be you. CYA, there was another story somewhere on here that a female patient accused a male nurse of fondling her. Not saying it didn't happen, but he could pull the same thing...especially if he's getting sexual pleasure from his cathing experience. I definitely believe your admin at your facility would protect you and themselves from any kind of sexual harassment charge. You definitely need to follow this up with your supervisor. No matter how much this man protests, a male nurse needs to cath him. PERIOD.

    Quote from mickeypat
    I have a male resident that had an indwelling cath due to issues of not being able to void and when he was straight cathed, he had an out of at least 900cc... As I was cleaning him off after removal of the cath, he said to me, as I was cleaning his privates, "Gee, I hope you take care of your husband as well as you take care of me." Didn't think much of it at the time, but later, he called me back in there and was "milking" his penis from sack to tip and asked me if I would wipe it off. I got a little freaked out when I went to wipe him with my gloved hands and his penis was semi erect! Now normally that wouldn't bug me, but it really bothered me!

    Today, he said that he couldn't go and wanted to be "drained" again! I told him that I would have the male nurse that was on do it, since I was in the middle of doing some other things that needed my attention. He got a little upset about it and said to me, "I would prefer a woman would do it, they are much daintyier about doing something like that." After that, I was very freaked out!!!!!!!!! This man has been found fondling himself, and is of right mind, but I'm not going to tolerate those kinds of comments. The male nurse would have done the cath, but the man refused to let him do it!

    I want to refuse to "cath" him, but not sure that I can. I am not comfortable with doing that, even when I take someone else in with me!

    What should I do?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?:imbar
  5. by   indigo girl
    This behavior needs to be brought up immediately to your director, administrator and social worker. It should be addressed in a team meeting with guidelines to be followed by all caregivers. No female nurse should be doing this care alone on this guy. Always have someone with you. He may be making remarks to other caregivers who bathe him, and that needs to be addressed also. Document his behavior. If you need help with that ask your director or supervisor how to do this.
  6. by   SilentfadesRPA
    I agree this is a problem to be handled by a team meeting so that a unified response can be said.
    With no rudness implied - I wonder if your "freaking out" did not tantalize mim or give him more power in his impotent state --
    Has anyone spoke to him or assured him that he is allowed to masterbate with privacy -- is he recovering and now realizing he has errections and doubting his masculinity ?
    As well though I surely hope you are in your charting quoting word for word and exactly what was going on when these interactions took place.

    Marc
    Last edit by SilentfadesRPA on Jun 18, '06
  7. by   Ms.RN
    uhh.... psych consult? :lol_hitti
  8. by   luvmy2angels
    Do you work where I work??? ha ha...seriously we have the same problem with one of our gentleman. He needs to be told that his comments are not appropriate and will not be tolerated. Tell your supervisor and document EVERYTHING!! We often have the male nurse do this guys cath. He doesn't like it much either, but then again....he shouldn't really be liking the experience should he???
  9. by   TexasPediRN
    No psych consult is needed...

    Boundaries just need to be set with this patient. Its hard to do sometimes and may need to be constantly reinforced, but thats what needs to be done.

    Also, if a male nurse/CNA is available, they should be the ones straight cathing a male patient.

    Just document fully and report off to your supervisor so he/she is aware of the situation..
  10. by   Wise Woman RN
    Sounds like he can use his hands... ergo, hand him the washcloth... no need to wash privates if the patient can do it himself... He can also be taught to cath himself...
    Last edit by Wise Woman RN on Jun 18, '06
  11. by   waterlili22
    wow that is very disrespectful...I think you need to bring it up to your charge nurse..things like that shouldn't just stay between you and the patient; he may try to change the story around if things get nastier and you try to do something about them then.
  12. by   waterlili22
    my..
  13. by   MS._Jen_RN
    Quote from Wise Woman RN
    Sounds like he can use his hands... ergo, hand him the washcloth... no need to wash privates if the patient can do it himself... He can also be taught to cath himself...
    :yeahthat:
    I work in Rehab. This is not uncommon in certian populations of our patients. Empowering them to do it themselves often helps for several reasons- it's not a fun anymore, it makes it seem more medical/less sexual, it is seen as a task/something that has to be done not something done to them. But do take the advise about alerting the DON.
  14. by   indigo girl
    Quote from Wise Woman RN
    Sounds like he can use his hands... ergo, hand him the washcloth... no need to wash privates if the patient can do it himself... He can also be taught to cath himself...
    Good point!! If he can do it. But, he may not want to.

close