What kind of LTC resident will you be?

I plan on being the one who watches staff when they key in the code to get into the med room and break room. Once I am in the med room, I am going to write all over the window with the many tubes of peri-cream. If I make it into the breakroom, I am out the door to go to the corner gas station to buy soda and candy. I am also going to steal the charge nurse's keys when she leaves themon the med cart and I am going to steal all of the ativan when she leaves the cart unlocked and unattended. I am going to sleep until at least 1000 and I am going to demand pizza and tacos and hunan beef. I am going to drink nothing but Coke, I am going to splash water in the whirlpool, and I am going to pee in the water fountain and plants! And...I am going to call 911 at least once a week. I can't wait!!!

OMG, I stopped working at the nursing home 2 months ago. I can't believe I forgot about the "Q" word already!!!

I'll be the one being sent to a geropsych unit, preferably the one I work at currently where I've chosen rm 8 as it stays nice and warm, for refusing medication and being combative with care (no one's wiping my backside other than me ). Once there, I'll constantly bang on the plexiglass enclosing the nurses' station demanding to call my children to come and get me out. And god help the staff who try to get me up before lunch or give me meds crushed in nasty, unsweetened applesauce.

After the fourth admission, my kids had better remember how many times I've told them they better make sure I'm gorked so I have no idea how crappy my life has become or I'll haunt them.

I have a friend who says she wants a tube in every oriface, colostomy, foley, and feeding tube so she won't have to get up and do anything. She will just sit in her chair and have them pour beer down her feeding tube.

Oh, and I'll be in the room with AC/DC blaring at full volume.

Of course I will have to turn the volume down when the surveyors show up. I what them to hear LOUD AND CLEAR what I've thought about them all me life!

Now please pass me some more pizza.

I like this tattoo....



I agree it'd be payback time. I can be very demanding and if I didn't get what I wanted, when i wanted it I'd be verbally aggressive and I'd wheel my fat butt into the DON's office turning in the staff.

I'd also demand a shower, atleast, 3 to 4 times a week. To heck with once a week. My hair gets greasy after 1.5 days.

Man I hope I don't live past 70ish and can always wipe my own stuff.

I'll be the one they put at the end of the hall because I'm SO annoying. I'll start smoking again and DEMAND to smoke when I WANT TO! I'll only eat pizza and burgers and drink lots of STRONG BLACK COFFEE! I'll be up all noc "making rounds". I'll call my kids at least 3 or 4 times a day asking for money or the go out on pass. Med compliant? Forget it unless it's ativan~ PAY BACK TIME!

LOL! I've thought about this as well!! This is why I'm busting my tail to get all my children through college (and beyond)!! They will all have homes with a mom wing, so they can trade off taking care of me!!