Starting to freak out...

  1. Anyone else feel like this? I start my lpn program in 64 days..been waiting & dreaming & planning for 15 years for this...I'm married, 3 kids, onein first grade, one in second, one in sixth. I'm starting to drive myself nuts over all the little things I haven't thought much about. Like, what if one of my kids is sick & no one will watch them & I have to miss a very big exam???? What about snow days? What if one gets sick at school & I can't get there? Then it just hit me a few weeks ago, there will be 2 mornings a week when I have to leave before the bus gets here..about 45 minutes differnce. DH is a truck driver && leaves the house around 2 am...he's home 2 days during the week, but of course not the 2 I need...so, what do I do? I need someone out here by 7am, and any teenager in the area will have already gone to school by then...there are both sets of very involved grandparents, who are always willing tohelp, but I think that would be asking alot, to drive the 10 miles out here that early for the next 10 months!! No one seems to be offering their help for this....do any of you think a sixth grade girl could handle getting the other 2 out to the bus? Should I try? I would have clothes, backpacks, cereal, etc.. all set out, she would just have to get them up & make sure teeth & hair are brushed & get them out the door. What do you think? I really don't have too many other options, unless I just put my guilt aside & demand a grandparent come out. I've laid awake nights lately..it's just all hitting me & it seems impossible that it's going to work out..I've never worked and I have never had to rely on anyone else to watch my kids, so I have no established system or routine for this. I certainly know that no daycare will take 3 kids at 6:30 in the morning & get them to school for me...not that I could pay if there was a place like that. Any advice would be great.
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  2. 16 Comments

  3. by   Ali_Oop07
    I think it depends on the maturity level of your sixth grader. You could wake them up earlier and have them dressed and ready (and they would have to go to bed earlier = study time ). Maybe a grandparent could be "on call" in case of a missed bus or a sick kid.

    Good Luck!
  4. by   AmyRNin06
    Hi there, you're not alone! I'm married w/three kids (oldest 8, youngest 18mo) and I keep thinking of all the "what ifs". The elation of being accepted into the nursing program is gone and this nagging anxiety has taken its place. I'm trying hard to realize that things WILL work out, as I'm sure they will for you.

    I think if you have a mature 6th grader, she could handle it, especially if her grandparents are just a call away to help if she gets overwhelmed or scared. I think I could have when I was that age.
    Have you checked with the school to see if they have a before-care program? Some offer breakfast for the earlybird kids. In my area, the YMCA runs a before-school program that is pretty reasonable, I believe.
    Amy
  5. by   lisamc1RN
    Well, I don't think you can "demand" anything from the grandparents, but you can ask them for help. They may not know of your dilemma, or that you want their help. Don't assume that they can read your mind. I would simply ask them to be your backup in times when children need to be picked up early. Is there any way that you can drop off the children at grandparents homes in the mornings, to be picked up by the bus at their homes? If you bring the breakfast, clothes and toothbrushes, etc. over, then maybe grandparents could get them ready and send them on the bus for you? It means an earlier day for your children, but it could work. In Ohio, children have to be 13 to do babysitting, and that includes watching siblings. If your state's laws are different, and they can be younger to babysit, then I would highly suggest that you enter your 6th grader in a babysitting program, where she/he can learn about safety in babysitting. You also might look into daycares in the area, especially in-home ones, where they actually do send your children on the schoolbus and will also watch them after school. It isn't usually as expensive as all day childcare. Good luck, whatever you decide!
  6. by   Energizer Bunny
    Oh Dear Lord...just in the first couple sentences, you sound just like me OP! LOL! I have no advice right now....too busy trying to figure out my own hysteria! Good luck!
  7. by   LittleCatB
    does the grade school have a morning latchkey program? you may be able to drop them off an hour early on the way to your school. call and ask.

    also, call local daycares and see if they have a morning latchkey program, w/a bus stop in front of the daycare.

    Are the grandparents on the way to your school? could you drop them off at their house and then have them either drive the kids to school or (if they're in the same school district) get on a bus stop by the grandparent's house.
    (bonus: keep grandma's house stocked with cereal and milk and they can have breakfast there)

    Also, I don't think it's unreasonable to ask each set of grandparent's to come in the morning once a week. There's no harm in asking!

    and finally, I think if your 6th grader is reliable, it'd be OK to have her get the little ones on the bus in the morning. My mom did that with us when my sis and I were in 1st grade. Except my older sister was in 5th grade, and my brother was in 4th. I admit we missed the bus a lot and had to walk to school, but the difference is my mom didn't bother getting me and my sister ready in the morning, LOL.

    Bethany
  8. by   fnimat1
    I totally understand where you are coming from. I've been a SAHM for most of my marriage...we're at year 10 now. I have 4 children and that equals 3 different drop-off's in the mornings. 2 days out of the week I'm going to have to be in class by 8:30 a.m. I'm still trying to find daycare for my 18 mth. old son. And talk about asking for help....I'm the one all of my family members, in-laws and friends call if their child(ren) get sick or for an emergency sitter. So I have no one to call........I do think it depends on how mature your 6th grader is....you should talk to her about it and see where her head is at. I would also call their grandparents and have them as backups. Don't worry so much...if you got this far, everything just has to work out.


    Fatima
  9. by   allthingsbright
    Hi! I'm totally with you on freakin' out! I have a lot going on this summer-combined with getting ready for clinicals, reading the two books already assigned, buying supplies/books, traveling, arranging school/childcare for my kids, etc. etc.

    I have two mornings/week in which I wont be around *literally* to drop my kids off! Thankfully, my husband works from our home and can help me out, but there will be times I'll have to find back-up help from family members. It makes me nervous thinking about it-but it will all work out!

    God Bless-you will figure things out!
  10. by   Love-A-Nurse
    what about a dependable neighbor? is there a parent, who you trust, at your children school that could have them at their house to be transported either by car or bus?
  11. by   NewEnglandRN
    Grrrr....

    I'm in the same situation. Clinical two morning each week at 7:00 and three kids to get on the bus. One bus does not arrive until 8:10 (5th
    & 6th graders) and my husband works early. Fortunately, one of our elementary schools offers before school childcare, but my boys don't want to go there:uhoh21: and it's expensive. If not, my MIL can help out.
    Good luck,
    Michelle
  12. by   Truly_Blessed
    I don't have an ounce of advice, just letting you know I too...am freaking out. I am a single momma of only 1, BUT my lpn program is from 8 am to 5 pm...therfore there won't be anyone to take him to school, or pick him up. So far, I am not having too much luck finding someone to help me out. Good luck to you!
  13. by   sabrn2006
    When my mom went to nursing school I was your daughter's age and my brother was 3 years younger. We got ourselves off to school for 3 years. My mom felt horrible and thought we would be traumatized from the experience. Now, as adults we both feel that we are more self-reliant and capable.

    My own 2 darlings, aged 11 and 13, will be getting themselves out the door on my clinical days. And on the other days they we will have to be very prompt and efficient to be ready on time. I worry about this, yes, but...I also feel this will be good for them. I've catered to their whims a little too long maybe. It's time they accept a bit of responsibility.

    When they were younger and I worked an early am job, I did have a family daycare provider who put my kids on the bus. I had to pay quite a bit for them to be there only an hour each day. They didn't care for her all that much, but she was the only one nearby who took children that early. Look around and see what you can find. You might be able to find a neighbor who wants to make a few extra bucks by filling your gap. Good luck to you!!
  14. by   purplekath
    You know it WILL work out! It's hard to believe how when you start fretting about all the "what ifs"...but things will work out.

    Trust me, after months of study you will NOT miss an important exam...it's amazing how creative a mother who does NOT want to repeat a unit can be!

    As for the problem with getting the kids out the door - my advice would be to give your 6th grader a trial run before you start. Just watch from the sidelines and step in if the younger ones are not minding her properly. If it's not going to work, then I suggest a neighbour or perhaps putting a notice up at the local shops to see if you can find someone to help out for a small fee.

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