Nurse vs New Grad

  1. I am all set to go into ICU, but just today i found out that 2 ICU nurses don't like the idea that me a new grad coming into ICU. My friend who is in her 3rd year told me that her preceptor (one of the ICU nurses and her best friend). Keep talking about me and the other person who is also being orientated into ICU, and keep saying were young, inexperienced, and etc to other nurses and that we should work on med/surg for a year. I have not worked with these 2 nurses nor do they know me, i feel like i am already having issues with my future co-workers. I also found out that they are the type that talk behind every nurses back and don't realize that students are listening to them and they also criticize other ICU nurses' work. I am a type of person who can be very shy, but i take all of my work seriously and always give a 100%, but for them to judge me and talk about me is not fair. As i said before there are ICU nurses that have watched me during preceptorship and undergrad and have encourged me to join their team, and are ready to take me in. But these 2 ICU nurses have other things on thier minds. Did i mention that there are only 6 ICU nurses working in this hospital. I don't want to come home each day upset, but at the same time i want to work in ICU.
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  2. 31 Comments

  3. by   msdobson
    Quote from Jenny12
    I am all set to go into ICU, but just today i found out that 2 ICU nurses don't like the idea that me a new grad coming into ICU. My friend who is in her 3rd year told me that her preceptor (one of the ICU nurses and her best friend). Keep talking about me and the other person who is also being orientated into ICU, and keep saying were young, inexperienced, and etc to other nurses and that we should work on med/surg for a year. I have not worked with these 2 nurses nor do they know me, i feel like i am already having issues with my future co-workers. I also found out that they are the type that talk behind every nurses back and don't realize that students are listening to them and they also criticize other ICU nurses' work. I am a type of person who can be very shy, but i take all of my work seriously and always give a 100%, but for them to judge me and talk about me is not fair. As i said before there are ICU nurses that have watched me during preceptorship and undergrad and have encourged me to join their team, and are ready to take me in. But these 2 ICU nurses have other things on thier minds. Did i mention that there are only 6 ICU nurses working in this hospital. I don't want to come home each day upset, but at the same time i want to work in ICU.

    Then DO IT.

    You are going to run into nurses (doctors, indian chiefs...) with that same attitude EVERYWHERE you go.

    Two things you can't do:

    A) run away from every department because some people resent, dislike or whine
    B) let anyone beat you down.

    You just go in, do the VERY BEST that you can, keep your chin up high and remember, that at the end of the day, you are there for the PATIENTS.

    You will find people like that NO MATTER what profession you've chosen. It is how YOU deal with the situation that decides the war.

    Battles are fought every day, and you will find yourself in the middle of them throughout your career.

    Be strong. Stand your ground.

    Best of luck,

    Mike
    Last edit by msdobson on May 10, '07
  4. by   Soup Turtle
    Think of yourself as the new graduate who will change their minds. Try not to go in there feeling defensive. They don't know YOU and don't have any opinions about YOU despite the fact they might have made comments regarding new graduates IN GENERAL. :spin:
  5. by   RN28MD
    i agree with you turtles.. i don't think they were specifically talking about you. new graduates are known for inexperience. nursing school clinicals is nothing comparing to the real world. many professionals suggest a year in med-surg. i know many nurses that went straight into er and did just fine. it was harder but they had great preceptors.

    i guess what i am trying to say is, i wish your friend never said anything to you. because now you are all upset and may not put all the energy that you are facing into this huge learning experience of your life. just try to forget what your friend said and focus on the excitement you had before she told you. you are the only person who will make this experience feel right. they are not going to tell you that to your face. it is just nursing talk. don't let it bother you. like someone said earlier, you will always find people who wont always approve of the stuff you do. it doesn't matter what they think. you know who you are and just prove them wrong with kindness.

    when i first started nursing i had a really mad preceptor. she didn't like me for what ever reason. she told me to my face that i wouldn't last in nursing. i was young and very shy. but that just pissed me off and i proved her wrong. i didn't let that put me down. at first i wanted to leave and run as fast as i can away from her. then i thought about it and said to myself "no, you will stay and prove her wrong". i didn't work so hard to have some nurse kick me out of my place. so i was very professional and did what i had to do and did stay in that dept for a yr. then i left with the respect of all the nurses there. because she talked a lot about me. but words are just words. when you do your job and others see that you are very good at your job. that is all that you can do. they will see with their own eyes how good you really are. good luck and don't let it get to you. use that energy and turn it into positive energy for the joy of the reason you became a nurse.
    :spin:
  6. by   Anagray
    This is a classic case of nurses eating their young. However, I agree that going to ICU as a new grad is not the road I would personally take. Success is individual and if you feel that you will be really good at it don't worry about what anyone says. DO the best you can.

    Nat
  7. by   southernatheart
    I just finished being precepted on a local Peds unit and am graduating tomorrow. The nurse who precepted me, I had heard wouldn't let ANYONE touch her patients, only observe. My first morning there, when it became obvious that this was her intention, I said "How about you watch me assess a pt, interact with her and her family , ask me any questions you want, and then decide what you want me to do?" I ended up with 4 patients of my own that first day, and a glowing review from my nurse. My point being that 1)have you SEEN some of the new grads in action?? not always so great and you can't blame a seasoned nurse for being apprehensive 2) sometimes its better to prove yourself through your actions than by words..knowwhaddimean?? Show them that you're capable, but at the same time, its important to realize that you ARE new, and don't know everything...so ask appropriate questions!!! Respect has to be earned, you can DO it! Good luck!
  8. by   Daytonite
    here you are just graduating from nursing school and i'm wondering if you learned anything at all while you were in school? one of the first things you should have been taught was to base your assessment of situations on facts, not conjecture, supposition, or gossip. gossip, no matter where it comes from, is not necessarily factual, nor it is a good source of assessment information when taken by itself. along with your education you must have had some psychology as well. while i'm not so sure you ever heard of a book called games people play: the basic handbook of transactional analysis by eric berne, m.d., you might want to look for a copy of it in a library sometime and leaf through it. it tells about how people play little mind games with each other to get attention and sometimes unfair advantage over others. we all do it to some extent. some people do it for very cruel reasons and mostly to fulfill personal neediness. gossip is one way of playing these games. if you want to believe your "friend", who i am not so sure is such a great friend for telling you the things she did, then go ahead. however, i would sure hate to base my future career on someone else's assessment and judgment. it sounds more to me like she's doing some dysfunctional jealousy thing though.

    if this is the way you make decisions in your life, then you've learned nothing in nursing school and about science. facts. gather all your facts first. that's the first step of the nursing process (assessment). you haven't even met or interacted with these people yet and you have already jumped to a conclusion about them. do you think you are ready to manage patient care? i 'd have my doubts about the critical thinking abilities of any nurse who might be willing to let stupid gossip from a casual acquaintance rule an important decision in their life. you're going to be an rn, not a milquetoast! knowing this, i'd also be thinking about whether or not this person would be capable of making decisions about the care and managment of icu patients due to failure to gather enough pertinent data first.

    loose lips sink ships.
    Last edit by Daytonite on May 10, '07
  9. by   jjjoy
    Pretty harsh, Daytonite. You've essentially told this person that this concern of hers indicates that she'll be a poor nurse. That nursing school should have already weeded out someone with such a thin skin. Yet, clearly, there are many successful nurses out there who aren't very emotionally mature... witness how many we hear about regularly on these boards! In addition to assessing the situation, a nurse also needs to recognize when to get assistance, which this person has done. If everyone who comes into nursing must already be perfectly immune to interpersonal conflict then we won't have many new nurses!
  10. by   GratefulHeart
    Quote from Jenny12
    My friend who is in her 3rd year told me that her preceptor (one of the ICU nurses and her best friend). Keep talking about me and the other person who is also being orientated into ICU, and keep saying were young, inexperienced, and etc to other nurses and that we should work on med/surg for a year. I have not worked with these 2 nurses nor do they know me, i feel like i am already having issues with my future co-workers.
    Uhhhhh....don't listen to your friend [really!]. *You* don't have any issues with your future co-workers. Your friend says she heard some garbage, but *you* haven't heard anything directly from these nurses.

    Congratulations on this wonderful opportunity (and don't let listen to / borrow trouble - even if it comes from a friend)!
  11. by   rnmomtobe2010
    ms.dobson said it best.
  12. by   Daytonite
    Quote from jjjoy
    pretty harsh, daytonite. you've essentially told this person that this concern of hers indicates that she'll be a poor nurse. that nursing school should have already weeded out someone with such a thin skin. yet, clearly, there are many successful nurses out there who aren't very emotionally mature... witness how many we hear about regularly on these boards! in addition to assessing the situation, a nurse also needs to recognize when to get assistance, which this person has done. if everyone who comes into nursing must already be perfectly immune to interpersonal conflict then we won't have many new nurses!
    that's exactly what i meant. if you don't think the world isn't harsh you are in for a rude awakening because there's people way meaner than me in the workplace and i don't think i'm mean. i'm direct and blunt in order to make sure i'm not misunderstood. of course we can't be totally immune to interpersonal conflict, but we ought to be able to recognize it when it is occurring (which would be an assessment) even if we don't know exactly how to deal with it (which would be interventions). the nursing process has very real world use. but applying it involves the ability to think and apply it to a situation. i can't explain how it is that someone with such a thin skin didn't get weeded out of nursing school. i wasn't there. i can't answer for instructors that are in a position of evaluating students; particularly at the op's school. however, the op did say, "i am a type of person who can be very shy", which might be a clue. what do you suppose was meant by "shy"? i'm not criticizing her concern over what she was told, but how she is dealing with that information. she said "for them to judge me and talk about me is not fair" and "these 2 icu nurses have other things on thier minds". these conclusions are based upon the statements that came from her "friend" and it sounds to me as if she has taken it as the gospel truth when the information was clearly subjective in nature. when you are learning about assessment in school, isn't the difference between subjective and objective data explained early on? isn't the weight you give to subjective data explained to you when you put it up against objective data? this is what makes nursing a science. this is why i said i was wondering if the op had learned anything at all while in nursing school.

    most know that i answer care plan questions. i know the nursing process. assessment is the foundation a care plan is built upon. if the assessment isn't as complete as it could be, or faulty in some way, the remainder of the care is affected. there is a domino effect. it's much like the leaning tower of pisa. it essentially looks like a good building if you tilt your head a bit. however, there's something wrong with the foundation that it sits on. you have to strive to make your assessments (and foundations) as solid as possible because you ultimately make decisions based upon analysis of that information. otherwise,

    garbage in; garbage out.
  13. by   RN28MD
    very harsh!
    Last edit by RN28MD on May 11, '07
  14. by   SuesquatchRN
    Huh? The OP said she's shy, not Daytonite. And yes, worrying about stuff a "friend" told her is thin-skinned. Some friend.

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