My husband won't let me do bed baths

Nursing Students General Students

Published

I told my husband that we are doing bed baths in lab on Friday. He looked at me strange and asked me why on earth I would want to do that. I told him that it is just something you do as a nurse. He looked at me weird and I told him we would be in shorts and a tank top. He said "Your not letting some guy practice on you!" I told him that it was a medical professional think and that it was not like the male student would be turned on or something. He said that the guy could and that no guy was giving me a sponge bath. I asked, "what if I was in an accident and in the hospital and they had to give me a bath?" and he said "I would give you a bath":madface: Has any one hand any problems with this? I better not tell him that eventually we will be learning to do cathaters...on males...

I think your husband needs to be told about your job. I have lost count of how many naked bodies I have seen in my 20++++ yrs of practice. I have NEVER seen one that made my heart jump and would not think of crossing the line of boundaries that is included in the oath that we take when we become licensed as an RN. Maybe you could approach it from that stand point with your husband so he will understand what it means to be a professional in the health field. I hope this advice helps.

i have never seen one made y heart jump either but i have seen mariages break apart nurse to dr and nurse to patient cause these folks end up getting it on with each other - it is not an unrealistic fear for him and if i have seen it often in my small town i am sure it is even more in bigger places.

hehehe- to lighten this up, my DH (dear hubby) does not mind at all. But I do have 'rules' ......

if it is a man- he has to pay a bill- i am to try to earn a mortgage payment ;)

if it is another woman... i am to videotape it

But from a serious aspect. It is a learning experience in front of a classroom. I doubt it is going to be sexual in any way, shape, or form.

We live in a military community and my neighbor across the street who just recently moved into our neighborhood is a nurse and was looking for a job....Her husband is military and didn't want her to work in the military hospital because he doesn't want her to be around all those GI's.

Well, after month and month of searching for a job she was finally "allowed" to accept a position in the military hospital. Rent is pretty high here in this area and he needs her money......he'll need her money even more next year since he will retire from the military and doesn't have a plan what to do with himself afterwards.

I've been married to someone who was controlling in that fashion and didn't even want me to get a GED ( I am an immigrant and that's what I had to do to start my integration process, nobody gave me any credits for any prior education in my native country....I felt like a naked mole rat when I first came here with that nut of a guy) He even went so far to say that my GED didn't count since I didn't grow up here. Needless to say I found the courage to divorce him and stayed in the US with my son. WE survived on 2 minimum wage jobs. It was very hard without any kind of support from anyone. Of course, he also made everything extremely difficult during the divorce and tried to take my son away from me too, said I wasnt a citizen and didn't have rights and garbage like that! All I can tell you is to get out of the relationship as fast as you can, these things don't get better!!!!! If you stay you may end up with a bullet hole in your head or worse, dead! RUN!!!! RUN!!!! RUN!!!!! Don't put up with it! My neighbor shows the classic signs of a battered woman, I was one but fought back....don't become one!

BTW, I remarried and now have a very supportive husband who does everything in his power to help me reach my goals.

Yeah!

Been there.... my ex husband started off by saying things like that - I couldn't do bed baths. He would phone me 8 times while I was in class and leave messages. When I called him back he would drill me about where I was and who was in my class, what guys were in my class. But he always told me he loved me at the end of it. It got worse and worse until he told me I wasn't allowed to hang out with my best girlfriend anymore cos she was a bad influence on me!!!! When he wanted to move to the other side of the country and started yelling and throwing things at me, I decided there was no fixing this situation and got me and my daughter out of there. I have been happily seperated for a year now and I am very proud of myself for being strong enough to be able to leave. Anyway all I wanted to say was that you need to fix the situation NOW or if you don't think it can be...and you'll know deep down .....leave. It's not the end of the world and life will get better again. No one deserves to be treated like that and no-one should put up with it. Good luck to you and if you need any support you know where to find me!

Alannah

Yeah!

Been there.... my ex husband started off by saying things like that - I couldn't do bed baths. He would phone me 8 times while I was in class and leave messages. When I called him back he would drill me about where I was and who was in my class, what guys were in my class. But he always told me he loved me at the end of it. It got worse and worse until he told me I wasn't allowed to hang out with my best girlfriend anymore cos she was a bad influence on me!!!! When he wanted to move to the other side of the country and started yelling and throwing things at me, I decided there was no fixing this situation and got me and my daughter out of there. I have been happily seperated for a year now and I am very proud of myself for being strong enough to be able to leave. Anyway all I wanted to say was that you need to fix the situation NOW or if you don't think it can be...and you'll know deep down .....leave. It's not the end of the world and life will get better again. No one deserves to be treated like that and no-one should put up with it. Good luck to you and if you need any support you know where to find me!

Alannah

Sounds just like what I've been through....good for you to leave!

Dont' go back either!

Good luck with everything, you can get through it.

good post. in myopinion the way the world views marriage ( to easy to get married and justget divorced " no fault - irreconsilable differences" etc - ) is a lot at fault for the way society views things - instead of working on it - its easier to just let go or "rip off thier ...." if they tell you what to do type attitude.

Thank God we don't live in the stone age anymore and women can choose if they want to continue to be married to an abuser or not.

I recently needed thyroid surgery....my thyroid tissue was damaged from getting choked and I suffered for years from the havoc that the injury caused.

Maybe you could call your police department and attend meetings of victims of domestic abuse and other violent crimes and listen to their stories. Most people "don't just get divorced"

To tell you the truth I would do it again, JUST MUCH SOONER if I had to. I took it for 11 years from a crazy guy and my son was in for it for quite some time, too.

Specializes in ICU, PICC Nurse, Nursing Supervisor.

This is funny...lol:lol2::lol2::lol2::lol2:

hehehe- to lighten this up, my DH (dear hubby) does not mind at all. But I do have 'rules' ......

if it is a man- he has to pay a bill- i am to try to earn a mortgage payment ;)

if it is another woman... i am to videotape it

But from a serious aspect. It is a learning experience in front of a classroom. I doubt it is going to be sexual in any way, shape, or form.

+ Add a Comment