My husband won't let me do bed baths - page 14

I told my husband that we are doing bed baths in lab on Friday. He looked at me strange and asked me why on earth I would want to do that. I told him that it is just something you do as a nurse. He... Read More

  1. by   suzy253
    Quote from deepsea diver
    Do you work with any type of medical knowlege, work in the field?

    Didn't think so, Nurses say far more graphgic and vulger things than this.

    I bet your'e husband leaves you after 2 months home due to your'e offense to tit and butt.

    Get off the couch, hell my mother only 4 days ago Died in my arms, I performed everything I ever learned.

    Ok spouse, tell me what it's like when a persons bowels reverves on them and tell me what it's called. because sweet heart that along with 4 th stage cancer killed her.

    Have a good day love.

    FLYNN CMDV-1 H.B.O. DEMT.
    Charming.
  2. by   Princess74
    Quote from deepsea diver
    Do you work with any type of medical knowlege, work in the field?

    Didn't think so, Nurses say far more graphgic and vulger things than this.

    I bet your'e husband leaves you after 2 months home due to your'e offense to tit and butt.

    Get off the couch, hell my mother only 4 days ago Died in my arms, I performed everything I ever learned.

    Ok spouse, tell me what it's like when a persons bowels reverves on them and tell me what it's called. because sweet heart that along with 4 th stage cancer killed her.

    Have a good day love.

    FLYNN CMDV-1 H.B.O. DEMT.
    Theres no excuse for this behavior, you may not come to allnurses and act out this way. You will be banned, just an FYI!
  3. by   nurse4theplanet
    I think he is a troll....do not address him. I reported the comment already.
  4. by   Princess74
    I'm sure your right, and I also reported the posts.
    Last edit by Princess74 on Oct 11, '06
  5. by   caroladybelle
    Quote from asoldierswife05
    Hope this one is deleted or edited as well
    The post is not the only thing that needs deleting.

    (Not only that - Naples FL and Panama City are only several hundred miles apart - that is one BIG neighborhood to live in)
  6. by   Princess74
    I'm still wondering... has anyone heard from the OP, I haven't seen her post in awhile, usually she post pretty regular. I hope there's not a problem!

    NEVER MIND, I see that she has been here posting on some others threads. Glad shes okay.
    Last edit by Princess74 on Oct 11, '06
  7. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Surprised this is still going since the OP isn't participating in it anymore.
  8. by   pagandeva2000
    Quote from Marie_LPN
    Surprised this is still going since the OP isn't participating in it anymore.
    I think this is going on because it is unbelievable...the practices that some nurses do. The OP probably had it with us...between some people thinking that she should leave her husband, to some judging the whole relationship on one comment (it may be that the husband may not be so bad) and all, she probably moved on and let us pick the spoils, LOL

    I certainly wish her the best of luck with whatever she decides. One of the things that we forget is that the whole family experiences nursing school right along with us.
  9. by   twotrees2
    Quote from HeartsOpenWide
    I told my husband that we are doing bed baths in lab on Friday. He looked at me strange and asked me why on earth I would want to do that. I told him that it is just something you do as a nurse. He looked at me weird and I told him we would be in shorts and a tank top. He said "Your not letting some guy practice on you!" I told him that it was a medical professional think and that it was not like the male student would be turned on or something. He said that the guy could and that no guy was giving me a sponge bath. I asked, "what if I was in an accident and in the hospital and they had to give me a bath?" and he said "I would give you a bath" Has any one hand any problems with this? I better not tell him that eventually we will be learning to do cathaters...on males...

    nope - my hubby cuold care less but i envy you ythat your hubby would help yo if you were sick. pat him on the back and respect his feelings - your in clinicals - ask instructor to have females only - you will get enough male acton in the field and its not much different...... oncce you are a nurse and if you acknowledge his concerne once your a nurse maybe he will mellow out and relaize a male patient will be totally NOT into you cause they are ill. as for caths that wont come ( at least when we were in school ) till clinicals and it will likely be on a very sick elderly person you need to make a 25 page careplan to address every thing wrong lool. lucky you - i really am envious......
  10. by   twotrees2
    Quote from Marie_LPN
    LET you?

    Might want to work on settling this now, though, or it'll just keep going on and get worse. He needs to get over the fact (and his insecurities with himself) that there's nothing sexual about any of the procedures.

    (I wouldn't have problems with this, mainly because i wouldn't tolerate my huband acting like they're my father telling me what i can and cannot do, especially when it pertains to unavoidable aspects of my career, but that's just me.)

    when one has insecurities - which he seems to have - he isnt just going to get over it - there arew ways to compromise - i am thinking by his statement the OP posted he is concerned abouther learning these skills on her fellow students who may be male- easy fixx - learn em on the women youll get enough in clinicals of men. as one poster posted never used to be women an men worked on each other anyhow - no reason it HAS to be - i would suggest she talk to her hubby - let him know her job is gonna enatil these things but she is willing to compromise and understands his fears - she can acknowledege that an she can ease his worries letting him know she will not just do it on anyone but when it comes to her job and having sick people she will HAVE to do these things and let him know how much she loves hm for being concerned. just my opinion.
  11. by   twotrees2
    Quote from RunnerRN
    I'm just not seeing why it is a vital part of nursing education to practice bed baths on classmates. Does anyone else see this as weird? Bed baths are not difficult - definitely a skill that could be taught on mannequins, or even during clinicals. When I was in school, my lab partner was a boy (one of 5 in our class) and my instructor wanted everyone to disrobe down to a sports bra to do breath/heart sounds. I guess she wanted to be damn sure we were putting the steth where it was supposed to be. Anyway, I refused - I felt (as did my fiance) that is was inappropriate to get half naked with a boy I barely knew. The only other skills we did with each other were making an occupied bed, transfers (bed to chair, etc), and blood pressures.

    thhink i would have told the instructor she could disrobe and teach us from her chair casue no way in he triple toothpicks id have sat around in my bra - sport one or not lol. there is no clinical experience done in the classroom that you cant do on the same sex person that you need to learn in the classroom - anything else ie - foleys etc- now who in the honest to god truth would even agree to have someone practice that on them in the classroom - first off - its not a procedure that is practical to do in class - it can enter bactria into the urinary tract etc - we did do injections after working on oranges on each other but that was the only procedure that ws in any way invasive we did and we never did anything that needed disrobing - or even wearing shorts - things sure have changed if they do things such as half naked bedbaths on the opposite sex and foleys.
  12. by   twotrees2
    Quote from moongirl
    no, I have never had this problem, I am married to an adult.
    If he is that controlling and freaked about bed baths, he surely isnt going to take the idea of you holding a penis in your hand to do a foley, or cleaning a man after a BM in bed. this is part of everyday. body parts. If it is going to cause him trauma that he cant get over, and you are going to allow him to tell you what you can and cannot do, all will not be well for you two and you should consider a different profession. I am a third semester student and I have already lost count of the number of naked rear ends and winkies I have seen

    i dont understand when this woman asked for advice why so many seem to be intent on causing trouble for her - which implying her hubby is not an adult or he is controlling or the other things people have said here - telling her to tell him just get over it instead of giving her advice of ways to go about perhpas compromising and or talking it out with her hubby. the way the OP stated it i got the fact that his biggest worry wasnt what she was doing but on whom she wsa doing it - ie a very vibrant young perhaps NOT sick male - if they can talk it out and she can get him to understand its part of the job ( which there is NO reason she has to do it in clinicals on the opposite sex - THAt can be done on real sick people - the classroom is just to get the basics not to get perfected ) - perhpas the guy really is a jerk and controlling as some have pointedout but unless we know this i am willing to give him the benefit of the doubt that he is just worried about loosing his wife as an insecuritie - that is as real an issue as someone being depressed and anxiety and other forms of mental issues - not to mention a tad bit of jealousy can spce up a love life- id give both my legs just for a tad bit of green in hubbies eyes to SHOW me he loves me - just my opinion.
  13. by   twotrees2
    Quote from asoldierswife05
    Thank God we didn't have to give EACHOTHER bed baths at the beginning of nursing school (I'm soooo modest)! My husband would have reacted the same...he is just immature and jealous sometimes! HaHa. For the most part, it is in a joking manner and I keep him in check when it gets out of hand. He was uncomfortable with the idea of me catheterizing male pts at first, and I just had to present him with reality...these clients are not Brad Pitt look-a-likes, nor is there anything remotely sexual about the act, but mostly elderly and very criticall ill clients who need a caring individual to perform skills to promote their well being. And from that point on, I decided not to indulge him in all the details of EVERY SINGLE thing I did. I still talk ALOT about what I do in clinical and at work, but just like I leave out the big medical words...I leave out details about things that he would overreact to due to lack of exposure/experience. I love my husband, but he was not meant to be a nurse so he doesn't always understand how I can do some of the things I do...and that's okay.:blushkiss

    i agree - after a very traumatizing situation where my hubby was near beaten by a dementia resident ( LOL still brings tears to my eyes i laughed so hard - but they did not find it funny heheh) because she was syure he was trying to kidnap "her" daughter ( mine actually lol who was sick and waiting for dad to pick her up as our shifts overlapped half hour) neither my hubby nor daughter have been supportive of my job - they just dont get it and thats ok - its an issue we just agree to disagree on and i dont do a lot of talking about it ( unless it is really a good thing ) with them - i get my support from others - my friends and family who DO get it. no reason to start ww4 in thier home just a need to get a treaty at the table and stand by it/.

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