Library Principles for Students, from the Old Testament

  1. Of the beasts of the field, and of the fishes of the sea, and of all foods that are acceptable in my sight you may eat, but not in the Library.

    Of the hoofed animals, broiled or ground into burgers, you may eat, but not in the Library.

    Of the cloven-hoofed animal, plain or with cheese, you may eat, but not in the Library.

    Of the cereal grains, of the corn and of the wheat and of the oats, and of all the cereals that are of bright color and unknown provenance you may eat, but not in the Library.

    Of the round pies of baked dough, topped variously and wondrously with goodness of the Earth, especially with extra garlic and double cheese, you may eat, but not in the Library, neither may you carry such therein.

    Of quiescently frozen dessert and of all frozen after-meal treats you may eat, but not in the Library.

    Of the juices and other beverages, you may drink, but not in the Library, unless it is that drink of two parts hydrogen and one of oxygen and only then should the mixture be held in a container of the prescribed shape and nature that miraculously do not spill even when uprighted.

    Indeed, when you reach the place where the Library carpet begins, of any food or beverage there you may not eat, neither may you drink.
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