instructor says nursing is not for me.. - Page 5Register Today!
- Feb 3, '12 by hey_suzQuote from benm93Exactly!i just read a great book on how introverts (me) work, and you say you don't like "small talk", which could mean pointless conversation to pass time.
If you are an introvert, and you are not the life of the party, it is not that you do not like talking to people, but, as an introvert, you value another kind of conversation. Not pointless "small talk" but conversation that goes somewhere, that is about important things in life, and what is important to you and the other person.
While you may view the chatting as pointless small talk, it will often turn into something meaningful, and you will learn more from strangers than you thought you would. Try to view the small talk in this light, and you may be surprised at how small talk with a stranger can be the best part of your day.
Listening is an overlooked skill. Not the talking. Do just enough talking to get the other person to say what is really on his or her mind.
- Feb 3, '12 by kool-aideI do agree with her that pts will not trust you to teach them or perform procedures on them unless you have built a relationship through talking to them and taking care of them in the proper manner, but I think it is in extremely poor taste that your instructor told you that nursing may not be for you just because you're somewhat awkward in clinical!
Being comfortable around pts takes time and experience. It took me about a year and a half not to stutter and develop debilitating flop-sweat while talking to or doing certain aspects of care with my pts!
Give it time, and DON'T GIVE UP!
- Feb 3, '12 by fltnrse2Dear Orlettta,
Nurses aren't born nurses. We learn to become nurses, it's a process. I have to say that I think educators who "opine" in your second semester that your not cut out to be a nurse don't know what thier talking about. What they have a crystal ball? It takes time to become comfortable in a clinical setting. Only you know how much you want to become a nurse, so I encourage you not to pay too much attention to theses cheap shots from educators. When I was really sick, the last thing I wanted was a chatty Kathy for a nurse.
Secondly, at the rate patients are being moved in and out of facilities you hardly have time to get thier name right let alone time for a conversation about thier lives. There is nothing wrong with you, and don't let other people try to control your behavior, be true to yourself.
You have no reason to defend youself, as long as you are doing your work and getting the grades, don't worry about it. One final thought, the main focal point in conversation is directing the conversation to be "theraputic". If this type of behavior continues with this same instructor I would go to the Director of your nursing program and ask for a meeting with her and this instructor. I'm picking up on the vibe that this instructor nay have some issues with power, and could enjoy intimadating students with a limited amout of clinical exposure. If this continues you will be putting more engergy into pleasing this instructor which takes time and energy away from your patient. Let us know how you get along. What you have described has no place in nursing education. Hang in there and don't ever let anyone take your dreams away from you. Beleive in yourself and not in what other peoples opinion is of you!
- Feb 4, '12 by flexisealGive your instructors what they want. Act if you have to. I know all to well about being shy and people assuming the wrong things about me. My 2nd semester in nursing school, my instructor said the same thing you mentioned. She said I "lack self confidence". That was really hurtful to me. What does she know about my self confidence? I completely lack it? I think nothing of myself? It really bothered me. 3rd semester of nursing school, the toughest instructor/semester, believed in me. She didn't go out of her way to say nice things to me, but I felt like she didn't dislike me. It meant the world to me.
In a nutshell....my 1st and 2nd semesters of nursing school, both clinical instructors did not like me. They didn't believe in me. It was my personality, and that's the bottom line. I may not be as likeable as everyone else, but I have feelings and goals and wanted to become a nurse just like everyone else. It hurt me so much. I think I gained 40 lbs in nursing school, from feeding myself with food to make myself feel better. 6 years later, I'm an awesome nurse and I could run circles around those same instructors And some of the students in my class, who were always the most liked, etc...some of them aren't even in nursing anymore! I've worked at some of the top hospitals in the nation and am damn good at what I do. Keep at it and stay strong. Play the game and do what the instructors want, but believe in yourself and never let anyone bring you down.
- Feb 4, '12 by dirtyhippiegirlEh. What sucks is that your schooling got brought into it. I think that people - in general - would be surprised at how many patients value a respectful silence. "Small talk" is a two-way street. Medical care is tiring. Hell, telling your story over and over again to nursing staff who are trying to make "small talk" is tiring, too.
- Feb 4, '12 by Sehille4774ME too lol. If we were already proficient at all these skills...then obviously we wouldn't pay the money to go to nursing school to learn them.
I wouldnt worry. Keep working on it..youll get better..their is always room for improvement
- Feb 4, '12 by MrWarmHeartedSince you're in nursing school and under the "rules" of your school and particularly your clinical instructor, then you have to abide by them. and show them that you can do it.
It's taking a personal interest in others like you would to a friend - or a person you would like to know better. Yes, it is a bit weird at first - for a new person/nursing student (or "stranger" as you say) to get "friendly" but you have to do it. it will help you for the future. Plus, it will keep you in the program (and you may want to be friendly/engaging - especially when you notice the instructor listening in
- Feb 4, '12 by JfarmboyI have learned a lot from reading everyone's posts.
I tend to be kinda the same way. To me it is a fear or a wall I need to climb over.
I would like to hear about peoples stories. A lot of which are very interesting. Like when we (family musicians) went to play at a nursing home they all are full of stories but have no one to share them with. I don't think half the time they even want to talk to their CNA's or Nurses...going by how some are treated. Old guys have many world war stories and every old person has a story of what they did for a living. IMO, talking to them and getting these stories shows that they trust you more than they do their nurse or whoever takes care of them. Such people(such as nurses) may not have time to chat and old people like talking,chatting, or having someone who will make them laugh. When I was a lot younger I got payed a dollar to kiss a old lady-no family members and she was lonely (ofc I didn't know I would get money for it).
So my advise is talk to them. Try to do so in a way that shows them that they can trust you.
As I said this communication thing may be a problem for me as well but I have to get over myself.
I like talking to people but usually with me it takes a few sentences before I am not nervous anymore. Once I let myself out of the box (so to speak) people actually comment on how i'm "such a good kid" or "nice to talk to". I do instrument sales which helps me communicate better. I have made $5 extra in cases where they thought I was nice to talk to. For me I was home schooled so I didn't interact with people as I should have. I am finding day by day it gets easier to talk to people without my slight fear. Also I think it helps a lot to get a part time job at a restaurant or being a cashier or salesperson. It helps with people skills and communication.
- Feb 4, '12 by Mandychelle79The small talk thing actually comes very naturally to me.
I typically look around the room to see if anything catches my eye, a book they are reading, a magazine, or heck even what show they are watching. It could also be jewelery they on, anything "safe" I typically do this before I do any of my assessment so I can build a rapport with the patient before I ask them how their bowels have been moving.
I work on psych so I talk to patients a lot. Small talk helps build the trust and they may share something with me that they havent shared before.
You begin to get the feel of when its enough Some patients are not receptive to the conversation, which is fine.