I was ready to walk out of clinical with 1 day left!!!

  1. I really need to vent!!!!
    I had the worse day of my life (with nursing). I am on a VERY BUSY ENT/urology surgery floor. My last clinical day is tomorrow, then I only have class, a specialty area for 7 shifts and exams.....then I will be a nurse. I have been struggling through this program for 5 and a half years, (for various reasons....I had some bad luck!)

    Today I had the biggest patient load that I ever had and I was on meds.
    I had one patient in respiratory distress, spiking a fever, another patient needing a new IV to be inserted, a woman with a trach that I could not understand, only expressed herself through grabbing my arm and hitting me...while I tryed to help her, by changing her and suctioning her, and it was not pretty!! respiratory secretions, vomit etc.
    I had another patient who thought she was a drill sergent, commmanding every step I took, and would not let me do anything for her, except answer her "questions", and pass her a bed pan.....I was not allowed to take her vital signs, remove her clips or do her dressing, because I am "not a real nurse". Thank God, my teacher passed her on to someone else.....I know it is the patients right.
    I think with practice with better time management, I could handle the patients.

    What really got to me was the lack of help from staff. As a student, it feels like we are expected to be an orderly and a nurse. It is not possible to do everything!! The staff nurses have orderlies to wash their patients.
    I have the greatest teacher, but I have not had her for a while, so I still have to go over my meds with her and it makes me late, while I wait for her...she has 6 others students to supervise.
    I was working with a nurse that helped a lot, yet made it seem like she was doing me a huge favor......when in fact I had all her patients!! I also did not agree with some of her techniques that would have been a failure in nursing school! Yet I am just the student.....so "I don't know better".

    It was completely out of character for me to feel so mad and upset that I was shaking!! Not to mention 9 hours without a break!!!!

    I cannot believe how I felt today, I seriously thought of leaving, for the first time, I was REALLY mad at the government for making us work in these conditions. It is totally disgusting!!!!!!!!!!!I want to be there more for my patients, but there is no time! I know this is reality.....Lucky for me, as a nurse... I will be working at a federal hospital in geriatrics where the working conditions are MUCH better!! I have been working as an orderly for 3 years there, so I know how it works.

    I have wanted to be a nurse since I was 16, and I love what I do, (normally).
    It felt good to have a patients mom, tell me I will be a good nurse. It made things feel better.
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  2. 4 Comments

  3. by   StudentSarah
    I'm glad that there is a place like this were you can come and vent. God knows every nurse needs somewhere to vent!
    Isn't it amazing how when just that one pt's mom told you you were a good nurse, it made you smile.
    For all the dissatisfaction and anger we are going to face (and have faced as students), it doesn't take much for us to remember why we are nurses!
    It's amazing just how much satisfaction and warmth a person can feel when they've been told they are doing a good job.
    Hang in there. Keep nursing for the smiles, you'll be a better person in the end.
  4. by   CEN35
    Don't walk out, don't quit! You will be a good nurse........it takes time. Everybody thinks it should come so easy. Well it doesn't.....and I can promise you, that no matter what others say, they have all had days like yours. I had them too, when I was in school........and clinicals. I can tell you so much about the things you mentioned, sterile technique etc etc. The bottom line is, your almost done, keep going and don't quit. You are gonna have days like this once your a nurse, and most likely you are gonna question yourself when you have them, and maybe wonder if you should quit then? I know I did,,,,,,,,there's a huge learning curve once you are a nurse. Despite going through school and thinking you know it all, or could be as good or better than anybody else out there......you will be suprised.
    I went to the ER right from school......and one day, after being off orientation for a bout 6 weeks.........felt like walking out and quitting........but didnt. I'm not a quitter, and despite all the stres and the feelings I had that day, I look back and am glad I didn't do that. I can sya though, the learning curve after school for me was huge the first 18 months....then it drops dramatically.

    Bottom line, don't quit, chin up and keep pluggin away and you will be fine.

    CEN35

    (Rick RN CEN MICN NM)
  5. by   CEN35
    Originally posted by CEN35:
    Don't walk out, don't quit! You will be a good nurse........it takes time. Everybody thinks it should come so easy. Well it doesn't.....and I can promise you, that no matter what others say, they have all had days like yours. I had them too, when I was in school........and clinicals. I can tell you so much about the things you mentioned, sterile technique etc etc. The bottom line is, your almost done, keep going and don't quit. You are gonna have days like this once your a nurse, and most likely you are gonna question yourself when you have them, and maybe wonder if you should quit then? I know I did........there's a huge learning curve once you are a nurse. Despite going through school and thinking you know it all, or could be as good or better than anybody else out there......you will be suprised.
    I went to the ER right from school...... after being off orientation for about 6 weeks.........I felt like walking out and quitting........but didnt. I'm not a quitter, and despite all the stres and the feelings I had that day, I look back and am glad I didn't do that. I can say though, the learning curve after school for me was huge the first 18 months....then it drops dramatically.

    Bottom line, don't quit, chin up and keep pluggin away and you will be fine.

    CEN35

    (Rick RN CEN MICN NM)
  6. by   VA_CCRC
    Sorry to hear you had such a crummy day! I have been a nurse for 7 years. I can still remember some days driving home from clinicals in tears. You just feel so frustrated sometimes. I can almost guarantee you will have days like this in your career as a nurse. But the good news is...you will have days that you leave work floating because you feel great about the job that you did that day. Pretty soon 'bad' days just don't seem so bad anymore. When I find myself getting frustrated or upset, I try to put it all in prespective. I try to make myself laugh and think "OK, it can't get any worse right now". HUMOR is key! Take it all in stride! At the end of a really bad day, I drive home (radio off) and have a debriefing in my head. What went wrong today? How could I have handled it better? Did I use my resources? How will I manage this situation next time? By the time I get home I feel 'cleansed' and I can enjoy the rest of my day...what's left of it!
    Best of luck to you Michelle, hang in there!

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