Anyone have a baby during school?

  1. I am just basically looking for stories of folks who have been through it, and what were your circumstances like? did you make it through or did you have to repeat any of the program?

    I am due about 6 weeks before my graduation. I am so nervous about this (no, it was NOT planned!) and wondering if I can do it. I just paid my tuition for my final semester today. :uhoh21:

    My director is a very nice lady who understand, one of my instructors I am very close to and she is so supportive of me. This all helps. And they are trying to work with me on how I can possibly do this and not fall behind. But any logistics are not worked out and I am freaking out over here.

    The thought of flunking out due to 6 weeks of school and having to repeat 9 months of school over again (not to mention pay plus have a new baby to worry about!) is killing me. I am so nervous.

    I have family support, and have childcare all worked out through my husband and mom. But physically, who knows how I will be after I deliver. Emotional state is a question too, I have been quite hormonal and crying a lot this pregnancy (gee, I wonder why?).

    I want to finish school so bad. So bad I can taste it. If I don't I'm so afraid of how I will handle failure.

    Rebecca
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  2. 16 Comments

  3. by   BeccaznRN
    Not me personally, but about three gals in my class had babies throughout our program. Everyone is still there! One of the gals opted to drop to part-time status and won't be finishing until next semester, but the other two stuck with us. I think as long as you have determination and keep pushing forward, you can do it. I do have to say though, those gals were back in class about 1 week after giving birth! You won't be able to miss much more than that as far as nursing courses go.
  4. by   MS. ICANDOIT
    I did it and so did a classmate. I had the baby on Friday and I was back in class on Tuesday (easy delivery). I didn't feel tired for a week but like you I had great support at home. The other girl did the same thing, back in three days and the days we missed someone in our classes either took great notes that we copied or taped the lecture for us.

    I was weepy too....just excuse yourself and pull it together, YOU'RE IN THE HOME STRETCH!

    GOOD LUCK!
  5. by   BlueEyedRN
    I had a baby in the middle of my second to last semester and my friend had a baby in the middle of the semester before that and we both kicked nursing school's rear. It is hard, but with a husband and mom supporting you, you can absolutely do it. It will be so much easier to get it done now than to wait. Just remember to study extra hard because labor and delivery cause amnesia. Do your best to not miss classes unless you absolutely have to. It gets really hard to drag your huge belly to class when you just want to nap and put your feet up, but it is so much easier than trying to play catch up later. Make sure and schedule some serious pampering time for yourself after school is over. Good luck.
  6. by   cherokeesummer
    I had my son last year. He was unexpected but very welcomed! When I found out I was pregnant I was in month 3 of a 6 month semester LOL...I finished that semester and took the next one off b/c I was a high risk pregnancy...basically Im a type I diabetic for 18 years and I was one month post op Gastric bypass surgery (YIPES!) so I had a lot of things to work with and didnt' want to worry about school too plus I have a history of a previous miscarriage and I didnt' want to add to the risks.

    So once I had my son in October, I had two and a half months before school started again. I picked back up with no problems. There are other ppl in my school who have had babies and only missed a few classes.

    The school would have given me two weeks off but for reasons stated above I chose to take a whole semester off.
  7. by   puggymae
    All of the above stories are positive. Here is a negative story - pregnant student - premature labor - put to bed for six weeks. No classroom, no clinical - just bedrest. I have seen lots of students breeze through pregnancy and deliver on Friday and come back on Monday. But sadly I have seen students be put on weeks of bedrest due to preterm labor, or PIH. Good luck to you (and your baby!).
  8. by   ILRN200
    I'm really scared too. I start nursing on jan. 16th. I had my son when I was 15 and I take care of my nephew's too. I do have some help because I still live at home with my mom. I've had nurses tell me that if I did ok in A&P that I should do fine in Nursing school as long as you can stay focused.
  9. by   kmarie724
    Three women in my program have had babies since we started in fall 2005 and two are pregnant now. So far, they've all done okay.
  10. by   jov
    Quote from PhoenixGirl
    I am due about 6 weeks before my graduation.
    I have family support, and have childcare all worked out through my husband and mom. But physically, who knows how I will be after I deliver. Emotional state is a question too...

    I want to finish school so bad. So bad I can taste it. If I don't I'm so afraid of how I will handle failure.

    Rebecca
    Not to be negative here but I think you better be more realistic. You may want to stay flexible about this whole thing...meaning be ready to take time off if need be. I've seen plenty of women work themselves right into premature labor. Think of dealing with a preemie who doesn't eat well, sleep well and you may find yourself putting nursing school into a whole 'nother perspective. The problem is you will be delivering in the last few weeks right before graduation, when there are the greatest time demands. When you miss clinical time, how are you supposed to make it up? And how will you do on tests if you haven't attended the lecture and you are completely frazzled with your mind on another certain small someone and you haven't had a straight night's sleep in 4 weeks...
    All I can say is having my first one completely threw me, even though I was in my 30's and an intelligent, well organized, competent woman with good support, bla, bla, bla. Couldn't even get out of my pajamas for 3 weeks (so I don't see how anyone can study from a nursing book and have anything stick). The real pity of it is you will be missing the first magical weeks of your newborn's life, something you can never recover. You may find that nursing school becomes far less of a priority than you thought it was...if you think failing at nursing school is bad, try on failing as a mom...
  11. by   mom2cka
    I'm due about 6 weeks before graduation as well - I've told my instructors, have cut my hours at work, and checking my BP religiously - and just trying to not stress out too much. Others do it - this one is my 2nd, so we're excited - just hoping that baby will be on time, timing is right, etc. My husband will stay home w/baby and I'll go back after a few days, but hope to be done with many of my clinicals by then so that I can be at home as much as possible. The school has a room for nursing mothers to pump, which is nice.

    I'm realistic that it'll be tough - but jov, to say that someone is going to fail as a mom because she's going finishing school is pretty harsh - there are many, many women who have to go back to work as soon as they can (before the 6 weeks, I mean - within days) because of circumstances - are they bad moms too? Or doing what is needed to better themselves / families / etc. I think of all the reasons I'm going to nursing school, and know that it'll work out. I'm worried about bedrest, but not too worried - the added stress isn't good.

    FYI - You won't miss the first weeks of baby - you'll go to school, come home, and do what you need to to make up for the time you were way - you'll be tired, but that's a given. I'm glad to hear that you'll have good support - that makes a huge difference!

    Good luck!
  12. by   jov
    I didn't say she would fail as a mom because she going to be finishing school. The point I'm trying to get across is having regrets for missing those magical first weeks. Those days are something you can't ever recover, while you can always go back and repeat a semester. Especially for a first time mom whom I would say THINKS she is prepared but more than likely is not. (it's like being prepared for your first hurricane LOLOL)

    Also you say there are many, many women who go back to work within days because of the circumstances, I would strongly disagree with that statement. I think the precentage of women who go back to work within days of delivering is miniscule, hardly in the many, many category. Again, for obvious reasons. Most people hardly know their name and address LOL much less function at work, and to expect them to do so is ridiculous. Which is why employers give 6 weeks, not 2 days.

    And one more thing, sorry but when you say you won't miss the first few weeks of baby because you will do what you need to to make up for the time you were away --excuse me, but being away for hours is exactly that - being away. How is she supposed to keep her mind on the lecture when her heart is somewhere else? And to dismiss it with only "you'll be tired" that is a huge understatement. Think jet lag for 6 weeks. Your underestimation of the situation isn't even funny.

    Look it's great for you that you can deliver a baby and life goes on hunky-dory without even missing a beat, except you're a little tired. That's not been the experience of myself or my friends and I think you are doing a disservice to the OP by maintaining it would be otherwise. I am not meaning to be harsh here but let's face it, going to nursing school is a tough gig, adding a newborn on top of it is brutal.
  13. by   PhoenixGirl
    Not to be negative here but I think you better be more realistic. You may want to stay flexible about this whole thing...meaning be ready to take time off if need be.

    Well, since I'm pretty realistic, smart and have been a mom for 7 years (I have two children already) I know what I'm getting into. I realize I need to stay flexible and that I'm going to be needing time off. I have had 2 beautiful, natural labors and bf'd both of my children for extended period of time and I am hoping to be able to do this again. Realistically I know when you are a mom, sometimes things turn out differently than what you've wanted as the "ideal."

    At any rate, I've been talking this over with my don at school and went to her with some different plans in writing and got the situation semi-worked out. Yesterday was the make up clinical for our class and I went for 12 hours and got a "credit" for two clinical days for next semester. This gives me room for one week. They are going to let me do this again a few more times to get "credit" so that when I have the baby I will be able to take 2+ weeks off from clinical. Our program is mostly online, with tests in person, and my critical care instructor (the class we will be having at that time) says she is going to work with me on when I can take tests, possibly work ahead a week while I am still pg so as not to fall behind.

    That leaves me only with my 3 week preceptorship to worry about, where yes I will be leaving the newborn at home. The don says this will be 3, 8 hr shifts x 3 weeks, and I am choosing a hospice rotation so that this will be easier on my body. She is okay with this and excited since no one else has chosen hospice but me and it's such a wonderful experience in nursing.

    My husband has taken his left over vacation days from this year, and transferring over to next year, plus the 4 weeks he gets for next year. This gives us a good amount of time he will be home with baby (able to drive baby to me for my breaks to nurse, plus I will buy myself a nice pump) while I am at this preceptorship.

    When you miss clinical time, how are you supposed to make it up?

    Maybe it hasn't occured to you that someone would be proactive enough to plan ahead for this? I'm lucky that I have a very understanding DON at school that is willing to work with me.


    The real pity of it is you will be missing the first magical weeks of your newborn's life, something you can never recover. You may find that nursing school becomes far less of a priority than you thought it was...if you think failing at nursing school is bad, try on failing as a mom...[/quote]

    I have been a mother for 7 years and will be one for the rest of my life. Beleive me when I say that I do not think 3 weeks is going to make or break me as a mom. Yes, I am more confident than that. I realize this is not easy to leave a baby at home and go out into the world. this not ideal. One of the reasons why I posted this thread because I've already thought of this and wanted to hear how others have made it work. I'm not an idiot, I've thought of this.

    And as an aside, I realize there is a sahm vs. working mom debate but that is not why I started this thread. I started this thread for BTDT stories from other students and interested to hear the good AND bad of how they got through it. Please, if you (or anyone!) want a debate thread on the merits of working or staying at home, could u start another thread and leave this one for it's intended purpose? I don't think I'm asking for too much here. Heck, I'd probably participate in that thread. But I've seen threads get so off track that no one posts on the original topic after awhile. I'm really interested in the original topic here. Thanks in advance.

    Rebecca
  14. by   PhoenixGirl
    I'm due about 6 weeks before graduation as well - I've told my instructors, have cut my hours at work, and checking my BP religiously - and just trying to not stress out too much. Others do it - this one is my 2nd, so we're excited - just hoping that baby will be on time, timing is right, etc. My husband will stay home w/baby and I'll go back after a few days, but hope to be done with many of my clinicals by then so that I can be at home as much as possible. The school has a room for nursing mothers to pump, which is nice.

    Ah we are in the same situation! We will have to keep in touch. So what is your due date?

    I've already talked to my instructors too about having a room to pump. They were both like "of course! use my office!" Nice having women, support other women, you know? We are also going to be doing the finger feeding system while I am away so that the baby does not have to take a bottle. I am so worried about how this is all going to play out that I'm trying to cover all my bases. Anything else you are thinking of (ideas?) to work out that you could possibly throw my way?


    I'm realistic that it'll be tough - but jov, to say that someone is going to fail as a mom because she's going finishing school is pretty harsh - there are many, many women who have to go back to work as soon as they can (before the 6 weeks, I mean - within days) because of circumstances - are they bad moms too?

    I think a mom working or going to school is admirable. hard, certainly not ideal, but admirable. It's better than say, partying all night while showing your crotch having a newborn at home, ala Britney Spears. LOL I hope I am providing a good example to my children on how wonderful education is, something to pursue and never give up on. And that you can have it all if you work at it and try hard. I hope my children will look up to me as their mom who is educated and bright, and they will pursue educational goals in their lives. Sure there are some that want to judge others for this choice, that is their choice. I prefer to look at it the way I looked at my parents who both went to school and worked while I was growing up. Wonderful role models.

    FYI - You won't miss the first weeks of baby - you'll go to school, come home, and do what you need to to make up for the time you were way - you'll be tired, but that's a given. I'm glad to hear that you'll have good support - that makes a huge difference!

    Well, in reality I *will* miss some time with my newborn. I am sad about this, of course. But I also feel I am proactive in working out the logistics of this. My mother is an awesome support, and she will be here helping my husband out with our children those days I do have to precept. My husband will drive baby to me for nursing breaks, I am so glad this is going to happen because nursing baby is extremely important to me.

    And when I'm done with school in May I can't wait to go back to being sahm! I will probably work a few days a month, but this daily grind is getting old.

    BTW, where are you working? I am an LPN working prn a few days a month in acute med/surg. I love this field.

    Rebecca

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