Why do we allow this?

  1. Why are we as educated individuals expected to allow the docs to treat us like we are dirt. I am so sick of it. One of the ones at my facility is very jeuvenille and tacky--prejudiced--just oooh he makes me so mad. He doesn't listen to you--and I got sick of trying to be polite and try to converse with the a$$hole-so I decided to just not talk to him unless it was necessary. I wasn't rude-mind you, I just didn't have anything to say and I didn't have any of his patients. He went to my DON and told her that I was ignoring him. WAAAA! I couldn't believe it when she approached me about it. What does he want? When I talk to him he treats me like an idiot--and says very inappropriate things--I guess I am just paid to put up with it. I am so frustrated AAARRGHH!

    Brandi

    Thanks--I really needed to blow off some major steam!!
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  2. 12 Comments

  3. by   2ndCareerRN
    NO!, you do not have to put up with that type of behavior, from anyone.
    Go back to your DON and tell her just what you said here. The actions of that person are rude and inconsiderate and you will not and do not have to put up with it. If it continues you will file a formal greivance against the doc. If he says anything of a slghtly sexual nature, first tell him you are offended and not to do it again, if he does file a sexual harassment greivance. You have a lot of power, you just need to harness it and use it in the appropriate ways.
    If there is anyone else he treats this way, get together and go to the DON. Do not let this cretin get away with his little power trip.

    bob
    Last edit by 2ndCareerRN on May 21, '02
  4. by   fedupnurse
    It is so annoying isn't it? We have medical residents that try to talk down to us. What jerks. I am of the opinion that if you give someone enough rope they will hang themselves. Is he obnoxious to everyone? We have a problem here that some of my colleagues kiss up to the docs so the docs expect all of us to do it. Sorry but I don't kiss up to anyone! When this doctor earns your respect you can then give it to him. Until then, ignore the jerk and speak to him only when you have to.
  5. by   eagleRN
    Most docsI have run across over 25 years of nursing have a GOD complex. THEY BELIEVE that they can heal and destroy, and some of them actually do believe and say they are God or "are like Gods" (Some complex ugh!) I have even heard some make similar comments. So....when they see us little RN's, LPN's and Aides, doing "menial" work, (in their minds ONLY) who are we to even question anything they do. I first DEMAND to be treated as a human being, be it Dr., DON., President, Administrator or whatever, if they don't treat me as a human being, they do not earn the right to converse with me. Period
    Last edit by eagleRN on May 21, '02
  6. by   caroladybelle
    At my facility, we have one physician that is incredibly abusive when called at night. I have stood up to him, so he does not do it to me. Most of the night nurses are now refusing to round w/him due to his abuse.

    Our AUD (we call her the IUD - painful thing in your gut, that gets you Sc*!@#ed and produces no useful results whatsoever) had a lovely meeting to explain "How to round w/MDs" - the basic premise was that we should just take it w/a smile on our face - "It's not personal" - but the fact is that it is, since he does it to some people and not others. Meanwhile the mood on nights is quite grim.

    When the unit loses staff, and no one wants to work there, and the AUD has to work nights - well, maybe they will learn.
  7. by   nightingale
    If your DON was worth her salt.. she would see what is going on. Brandi, straighten out your DON. She needs to know so she can simply say to that Doc next time, "Oh for heavens sake"!

    (((((((((((((Brandi))))))))))) tomorrow will be better....

    B.
  8. by   jevans
    Do you have a system where by you report incidents?
    In the UK we have incident reporting whereby you report any incident including verbal abuse. These reports are sent to Health and Safety where they are logged, then to senoir management

    This certainly sounds as if you are experiencing a pathetic little individual who needs to be taught manners!!!!!!!
    WE DO NOT HAVE TO INDURE THIS TYPE OF BEHAVIOUR WE ARE PROFESSIONALS
    Best wishes
    j
  9. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I am of the belief that in general, we teach others how to treat us. If you have issues w/the medical staff mistreating you, take them aside and tell them so. If they persist, keep a log of times, dates and what they say and report it up the chain. YOU do not have to stand for it! Oh and you CAN always use the good ole "incident report" or "occurence report" system to do this if necessary. The idea is to create a paper trail and be able to show a trend in writing. It does not hurt to let them know you are doing this, too, if they are repeat offenders. We ARE professionals, too, and like I said before, we do not have to sit still for substandard treatment. Show them OTHERWISE!
    Last edit by SmilingBluEyes on May 21, '02
  10. by   eagleRN
    If they persist, keep a log of times, dates and what they say and report it up the chain. (As said by SmilingBluEyes) is the key. Keep your own personal log everyday on every incident worth noting, whether a md or don or worker, it also helps you to ventilate frustrations without upseting anyone. Just remember to put every incident that may EVER come into question in the future, in it. IT works.
  11. by   Jay Levan
    What really pi$$e$ me off is when they talk to you as though you were their child or even worse when they treat you like you have NO medical knowledge. I thought about having a tattoo emblzened on my forehead, It would be a LARGE TAZ, with his arms raised and his mouth wide open baring his fangs, and in Taz's shadow would be this little M.D. complete with lab coat and stethoscope, the Caption would read, "You little Dr., Me BIG nurse TAZ!"(Yes, I have enough room on my forehead it goes all the way back to my occipital region :-) Jay)
    Last edit by Jay Levan on May 22, '02
  12. by   petiteflower
    LOL JAY--MY FOREHEAD ISN'T QUITE THAT BIG--BUT AT LEAST IT'S WORTH A SHOT. OR HOW ABOUT ONE ON THE BICEP--THEN YOU CAN FLEX IT AND REALLY GET EM WORRIED.
  13. by   angieRN
    Today I get an order from doc saying "Perform mouth care and eyelid care TID. It makes me so mad that he thinks we don't perform mouth care. On my NPO patients, I perform mouth care up to four-five times a shift or more if needed. An order like that is a slap in the face and I told our nurse "liason" that rounds with the docs exactly what I thought. His respone was "Hey, don't shoot the messanger."
  14. by   Teshiee
    People will do what you allow them to do. What makes me mad is that there is always one nurse that bows down to a doctor and he or she think all nurses do that. When you are the one who doesn't you are labeled hard to work with or a trouble maker when all you were doing is demanding respect. Personally, I see how nurses treat one another but that goes without saying. I refuse to take abuse from a MD or anyone. I am a human being that so happen to be woman and I expect to be treated with respect if they want it in return.

    I also notice that some MD's will try you to see what kind of nurse you are. When they realize you don't take crap they usually back off and prey on nonconfrontational individuals.....which to me is a bad move because they may have something for them in long run.

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