What Was the DUMBEST Request Made By A Patient? - page 4

Once, I saw a patient in a wheelchair while I was walking to my clinic and she asked me for a wrench. I asked why and she said "I need you to screw in my wheels". Another one was I was walking... Read More

  1. by   registerednut1221
    I had a patient who had refused her colace for DAYS (and had not had a BM in about as long) tell me that she was consitpated and seriously asked me "Whose your 'digger'?" OMG! I told the doc of this incident and told him that even if my job depended on it, I absolutely REFUSED to go "digging" in this nasty woman's @$$. Hey, I'm here to help and I'll do pretty much anything BUT you gotta draw the line somewhere!
  2. by   not now
    A request for a new bed because the one she was on was "lumpy" it's the same one we have in all the rooms. If you push on it you can tell there's and egg crate type thing on it but it's sealed inside the mattress, I can't remove it. Anywho, she was not having it even when I explained that all the beds are the same. When the doctor came in, I had just admitted her from the ED, she told the doctor. MD came out "Give her a specialty bed so she'll stop complaining." Uh, what kind? We've got like three different kinds. "I don't care! Make her feel like she's at the damn Hilton!" Huh, Total Care it is...
  3. by   tmulder
    My favorite just happened the other night and it was the pt's husband not the patient that was dumb as a box of rocks. This priceless gem of a spouse had the audacity to repeatedly ask me for something to sleep on or he was going home .........all this while I am treating his sweet wife who was hemorrhaging after giving birth to his beautiful baby boy.

    I told him that I would find him a cot as soon as I stopped his dear wife from bleeding to death. Did that phase him? Nope. He "hmpphed" and pouted and slammed himself into a chair muttering under his breath.

    What a prize
  4. by   pagandeva2000
    I would have given that hubby a donut of nails to sit on.
  5. by   Diary/Dairy
    Quote from tmulder

    What a prize


    What a jerk!
  6. by   soozeeqrn
    Quote from island40
    I still believe that the dumbest remark I have ever heard is patients appologizing for waking me up when they call for assistance during the night. Good grief!
    When I first started working night shift, I wondered if it was because I looked really tired or something. After asking the other night nurses they all said it happens to them. Sometimes it doesn't matter how many times you explain that your ARE awake and that they are NOT bothering you, they still don't get it. lol
    It also never stops amazing me that these poor souls don't want to bother you for something like pain meds or bathroom assist,when there is the other group who call for you to hand them a tissue when the box is right next to their hand.
  7. by   soozeeqrn
    I work 11 pm to 7 am on a post-op floor, so it is not unusual for us to have a family member stay over night. I once had a 25 yo male patient who had incision and drainage of abscessed tooth. He requested cots for 4 family members. He also wanted us to order guest trays for all of the family members. After very politely, explaining that it is not possible for more than one of the family members to stay, he was furious when we still wouldn't order breakfast for the whole group who was planning on coming back early in the morning. The family called the house supervisor, who explained that their requests were unreasonable, she provided them all with the cafeteria and visiting hours. The funny thing is that he was a 23 hour observation.
    We have also, on more than one occasion, had patient's who want to have a young child ages 7-12 stay over night to "Help" take care of the patient.
    There really is a shortage of common sense out there. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to spend some time vacationing in that "self absorbed" world. lol
  8. by   mama_d
    I had a patient come to the floor from ED in respiratory failure...I work tele, not stepdown or ICU, and that's where she should have gone, showed up blue with sats in the 70's and declining despite NRB. Of course, faxed report had said she was 90's on 6L per n/c. The daughter proceeded to scream at me b/c I caused the decline in condition, even though the patient wasn't even transferred from the stretcher yet. Then the daughter LEFT her five year old son in the room while she ran to the store without telling anyone. Imagine how horrified the poor kid was when we had to pick him up and run him into a different room when we had to intubate granny on the floor. Daughter moseyed back in an hour later and proceeded to scream at the staff (at about 2 am) b/c we moved her mom without telling her...she had left no contact info before she took off...and b/c her son was sleeping in an unoccupied patient room without anyone watching him.

    Then there was the daughter of a new admit who demanded "you get up off your *** and do your j-o-b and find those papers from the nursing home" after I had just explained to her that I had called ED and they did not have the papers, they were not in the chart, I did not know where they had gone to, but had already contacted the NH to fax me another copy. She claimed to be a lawyer but had at best a fifth grade education from the way she talked. I nearly bit my tongue off to keep from saying what I wanted to to her.
  9. by   SmilingBluEyes
    This is not dumb but bittersweet:

    Had a sweet little ole lady who had a hysterectomy. She must have had a touch of sundowners, she kept asking me to take her baby to the nursery and feed her.

    Thing is we are also an L/D unit so I thought maybe she heard crying babies and this caused her to ask me this. She insisted she was ready to go home with her baby the next day. Kept having to re-orient her.

    It just struck me as a bit sad as her only child was deceased.
  10. by   accessqueen
    My patient asked me for a pecan. I really couldn't figure out why she wanted a pecan. It occurred to me that it was pecan harvesting time, as i saw 'PECANS FOR SALE" signs on my way to work everyday, but I still thought it was kind of odd that my r/o MI in ICU had her mind on pecans. She looked at me with exasperation and repeated, "listen I really need to pee, could you PLEASE get me a PEE CAN!!!!!
  11. by   chenoaspirit
    Quote from accessqueen
    My patient asked me for a pecan. I really couldn't figure out why she wanted a pecan. It occurred to me that it was pecan harvesting time, as i saw 'PECANS FOR SALE" signs on my way to work everyday, but I still thought it was kind of odd that my r/o MI in ICU had her mind on pecans. She looked at me with exasperation and repeated, "listen I really need to pee, could you PLEASE get me a PEE CAN!!!!!
    :chuckle That is hilarious! Thats just priceless.
  12. by   lpnflorida
    I had a patient ask if they could have lobster for supper. I replied I could ask, but I was not sure if it would happen.

    Well their doctor was at the nursing station. Tongue in cheek, I told the doctor about their patient's request. Low and behold, he took the patient's chart wrote the order. ( patient is to have lobster for supper today).. sure as heck that patient got a small lobster tail that night.

    amazing........lol
  13. by   ErraticThinker
    a patient complained to me that her ice chips were too cold and she demanded that microwave them to bring them to a more suitable temperature. I explained that if i microwaved them, they wouldn't be ice chips anymore, but she would have none of it. I brought in water and she yelled at me to bring her ice chips and further insulted my understanding of basic physics...

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