What is the dumbest order you ever read? - page 21

I thought I had seen some AH orders but yesterday took the all time win! I had a 97 year old man admitted from ER with impaction and the order said---- "Give oil retention enema and have pt. hold ... Read More

  1. by   jlmb214rn
    Chapstick prn.

    Do not allow this triple lumen to be accidentally pulled out.

    Keep the penis elevated. (hmmmm)

    Open drapes at 0600.

    Do not put sticky notes on the front of my charts. (an actual order on a chart)

    Thin this chart.

    On the same page of orders:
    Time = 2000

    *Vital signs q4.
    *Flagyl 250mg po q8 hours. First dose now.
    *CBC, CMP in am (our docs want labs drawn at 0500 so results are in
    when they round at 0600)
    *Please allow patient to sleep between the hours of 0000 and 0600.
    (So which do we follow doc?? VS at 2, Flagyl at 4, labs at 5? Or let her sleep?)

    We had a doc that would only order mineral oil in juice po for constipation. Yuck.

    Mountain Dew po with meals.

    Doc orders morphine for a patient with a pulled muscle in her back. I call back to see if we can maybe get her a muscle relaxer as the Morphine is not working.... He says "Sure, do whatever you want." Was serious, not sarcastic. I was like "So ummmm, what med?" "What do you think?" he says. I pause... "Ummmm, maybe Flexaril 10mg po q8prn??" "Good, we'll go with that!" he says. "Thanks!" he says.
  2. by   RainDreamer
    This was the order I had a few days ago:

    "No new orders"

  3. by   Vito Andolini
    Give beta blocker when pulse is better. Uh, well, better than 30 could be broadly construed. How about some actual numbers, Doc? And how about get him off that bb totally?
  4. by   Vito Andolini
    Quote from jlmb214rn
    Chapstick prn.

    Do not allow this triple lumen to be accidentally pulled out.

    Keep the penis elevated. (hmmmm)

    Open drapes at 0600.

    Do not put sticky notes on the front of my charts. (an actual order on a chart)

    Thin this chart.

    On the same page of orders:
    Time = 2000

    *Vital signs q4.
    *Flagyl 250mg po q8 hours. First dose now.
    *CBC, CMP in am (our docs want labs drawn at 0500 so results are in
    when they round at 0600)
    *Please allow patient to sleep between the hours of 0000 and 0600.
    (So which do we follow doc?? VS at 2, Flagyl at 4, labs at 5? Or let her sleep?)

    We had a doc that would only order mineral oil in juice po for constipation. Yuck.

    Mountain Dew po with meals.

    Doc orders morphine for a patient with a pulled muscle in her back. I call back to see if we can maybe get her a muscle relaxer as the Morphine is not working.... He says "Sure, do whatever you want." Was serious, not sarcastic. I was like "So ummmm, what med?" "What do you think?" he says. I pause... "Ummmm, maybe Flexaril 10mg po q8prn??" "Good, we'll go with that!" he says. "Thanks!" he says.
    I can't drink oil to save my soul. I'd be sending someone out to the drug store to get me an enema kit.

    Doctors like to have nurses do the ordering when they don't know what to order, don't you know?
  5. by   ElvishDNP
    I love it when I'm in the nursery and the pediatrician comes in on his/her morning rounds and asks me, "Is Baby Jones (or whatever) going home today?"

    "Well, Doc, that's kind of your call to make."
  6. by   blondy2061h
    "Lasix 20mg IV PRN"

    Uhm, prn for what? When she asks for it?
  7. by   k-la
    Some of the nurses at work were just talking about this at work yesterday. One that made me laugh was "If no BM in p.m. give MOM in a.m."
  8. by   lpnstudentin2010
    Quote from RainDreamer
    This was the order I had a few days ago:

    "No new orders"

    at least it let you know he was there and looked at the chart if you did not see him
  9. by   loricatus
    "Redo pts eye makeup before discharge" :grn:
  10. by   twistedpupchaser
    Last week: "Call RMO for different chest pain" on a Pt who had spent three days in coronary care before admitting to our ward and then having chest/epigastric pain.
  11. by   RNAnnjeh
    Quote from loricatus
    "Redo pts eye makeup before discharge" :grn:

    NO WAY!!!

    Sorry...that is just too much! I just can't stop shaking my head. Guess her mani/pedi was looking OK???

    Argh!!:icon_roll
  12. by   shellbell55
    I had a obese patient 289 pounds and the doctor wrote a order for daily weights. He wrote if you don't have a scale to weigh her, take her to the zoo and put her on the scale they weigh the elephants and phinos on. Seriouslyr
  13. by   elizabells
    Quote from shellbell55
    I had a obese patient 289 pounds and the doctor wrote a order for daily weights. He wrote if you don't have a scale to weigh her, take her to the zoo and put her on the scale they weigh the elephants and phinos on. Seriouslyr
    Um, I think a certain doctor might need to go back for a refresher course in sensitivity. Jaysus.

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