What is the dumbest order you ever read? - page 13

I thought I had seen some AH orders but yesterday took the all time win! I had a 97 year old man admitted from ER with impaction and the order said---- "Give oil retention enema and have pt. hold ... Read More

  1. by   Ruby Vee
    i've seen a few dumb orders in the past 30 years.

    "flower care q 24 h." (he wanted us to water the patient's flowers.)

    "mom 30 cc im." (sadly, a student nurse actually gave that one.)

    "bathe patient before intern sees." (common in our inner city hospital)

    "bathe patient before attending sees." (common in our rural hospital.)

    "do not call me for anything unless the patient dies." (no, it wasn't a dnar patient.)

    "only attractive nurses to care for this patient." (patient was a vip)

    "only ugly nurses to care for this patient." (patient was notoriously inappropriate with female staff.)

    "do not wake me up for dumb stuff." (i could almost sympathize -- the nurse was a new grad and wasn't the brightest bulb by any means. but still, this is a legal document!)
  2. by   EmmaG
    Quote from ruby vee
    i had an order for q 1 hour arterial blood gases on a dnar patient.
    when i see idiots order crap like this, i always ask them just what they plan to do with the results? how will it change the treatment?
  3. by   ebear
    Ruby Vee, I do hope you reported this resident!
  4. by   JaredCNA
    Quote from Alois Wolf
    I feel your pain, I got off work at 8am. and slept till about 3... when my brain is like, "The sun is out you fool, what are you doing when you should have been asleep last night". I've been on the shift for 3 years... you think I would be used to it by now lol
    I've been on it for a year now and am doing okay, it's just hard having 1 day off.

    But I wouldn't work anything else...I love noc. I really can't stand the sun though-- it gives me a horrible headache since I've been working nights.
  5. by   sinus.rhythm
    Patient is in terminal condition, with trache and PEG in place. New MD orders: Do not resuscitate, do not intubate. RN may pronounce!:trout:
  6. by   elizabells
    Quote from ruby vee
    then the door slammed open and the resident stomped back out of the room, flung the dirty (glass) blood gas syringe against the wall and screamed "ok, you *******! you can d/c the blood gases. you won!"
    when/where on earth was this? if a resident had called us ******* and thrown a dirty sharp on my unit, that resident would have only been a resident until the attendings showed up for rounds. i'd have called security on his @ss.
  7. by   EmmaG
    Quote from sinus.rhythm
    Patient is in terminal condition, with trache and PEG in place. New MD orders: Do not resuscitate, do not intubate. RN may pronounce!:trout:
    I haven't slept, so maybe I'm not getting this one.

    ??
  8. by   TexasPediRN
    child life to provide game system console-

    for parents!

    this one annoyed me the other day- first of all, child life is there for the child, not for the parent to have video games to play. second of all, who writes an order for that???


  9. by   DutchgirlRN
    Chocolate Cake for lunch please
  10. by   EmmaG
    Quote from DutchgirlRN
    Chocolate Cake for lunch please
    Make that two!
  11. by   buggal1989
    Quote from TrudyRN
    I don't blame him. I have never understood why we have to call in the middle of the night to tell a doctor his patient died - when it was an expected death. What is he supposed to do about it?
    Why not hold that call until about 5:30, at least?

    Oh, and don't forget - taking VS on a presumed corpse just might yield some sign of life still there! It's been known to happen. Creepy, I know.
    Yes, we had a pt who had EMD (what the heck is it now - PEA?????? Can you spell R.E.T.I.R.E.D. and don't care no more cause my doc has said i will NEVER be able to work EVER again - if you read bitterness along with the humor you win!!! It's just a y.k.w. to go to school for 4 yrs, pay on a loan for 10 yrs, finally work your way up to really good pay and are in a job you LOVE (hate the co-workers-LOVED the job) to be told you will NEVER, EVER get to work again becasue of a y.k.w. disease!!!) Back to the story: who was in PEA for at least 1hr 45 mins becasue the shift did NOT want to pronounce him on THEIR shift and have to do all the work - - - soooo they left it for US and who was the lucky winner of the dead pt???? ME!! BLING! BLING! I know he was dead at the time of report as he had no pulse (A-line) and no respiration - - - so when I did call the doc (of course he said NO CODE) and I had to wait for him to come up to actually see the pt as we could not pronounce - it was at LEAST that amount of time that he had a rhythm on the monitor - we wanted to see how long the rhythm would last and we were up to AT LEAST (remember we didn't KNOW how long he had been dead - cold and stiffing upon assessment is NOT "just dead" as the previous shift tried to tell us the next day) but then the doc came and we had to do all the other business of getting a pt prepared for the morgue and had to disconnect him).

    Now as to the champagne - if I come in to any of your hospitals you make take that order if a resident writes it for me!! But ask him/her for more!

    Now as to the resident who threw the bloody syringe we would have called the attending RIGHT THEN no matter what the TIME was and his but would be in TROUBLE!!!

    WOW this is LONG - if you read it to the end you should get a reward, but I just ate my last cherry cordial kiss!
  12. by   buggal1989
    Quote from JaredCNA
    I've been on it for a year now and am doing okay, it's just hard having 1 day off.

    But I wouldn't work anything else...I love noc. I really can't stand the sun though-- it gives me a horrible headache since I've been working nights.
    I worked nights in the ICU and came home and tried to sleep - the room was totally dark and I felt like I was in a cave - I got really disoriented and it took my hubbie several mins to get me straight when he came home - so I moved to another room and the guy across the street had to rake his leaves - every day - all day long - and he had to rake the SIDEWALK (you may guess I now live where there are NO sidewalks). But I want you to tell the truth Jared- you're really a vampire aren't you?
  13. by   JaredCNA
    Quote from buggal1989
    I worked nights in the ICU and came home and tried to sleep - the room was totally dark and I felt like I was in a cave - I got really disoriented and it took my hubbie several mins to get me straight when he came home - so I moved to another room and the guy across the street had to rake his leaves - every day - all day long - and he had to rake the SIDEWALK (you may guess I now live where there are NO sidewalks). But I want you to tell the truth Jared- you're really a vampire aren't you?
    I supposed not...3rd shift Phlebs are the true vampires, that's the silly joke we've always had anyway. For the longest time they'd play along with it and wear black scrub tops and pants.

    See how bad we need entertainment at night?

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