what is my problem?

renerian, BSN, RN · Dec 22, 2002

Won't always have good friends at work. That is okay. Your there to work not make friends. So if you like it try to ignore the other. I know it is easier said than done.

welcome,

renerian

baseline · Dec 22, 2002

Nothing I can add to this! Good advice.

Tweety, BSN, RN · Dec 22, 2002

If you read my "postal" thread, I'm beginning to think there's something wrong with me. I'm starting not to get along with my coworkers more and more. They are not willing to help out, expect the charge nurse to be the janitor, maintenance man, maid, etc. while they leave to smoke. The are not willing to go the extra mile when necessary without whining and complaining.

I think though, we just have to do what is best for the patients. Even if that means not having many friends. But I doubt I could continually work an atmosphere where selfish concerns overide patient care, and negativity prevails.

I'm still processing whether it is truly happening or it is just me, or probably a combination of the two. But this board has been getting an earful from me lately.

Thanks.

angelbear · Dec 23, 2002

Thank you all for the uplifting advice and encouragement. It means the world to me. You are all right. The people pleasing thing was the thing they wrote on my eval for me to improve on for next year. You are all very perceptive and I will work on it Thank you.

SmilingBluEyes · Dec 23, 2002

I said this before: I don't go to work to make friends. I really don't. I do my work honestly, with integrity and pull my weight as well as jump in when others need help. IF in the process of working this way, I make a friend or two (and I have made a few DEAR, WONDERFUL friends), then so much the better for me. If not, I have lost nothing. They know they can count on me as a coworker to do my part and work as a team player. What more should anyone strive for, in nursing, or anywhere else they work?

Vailgang · Jan 3, 2003

I find it very interesting to read the previous posts. I too never mingle with other nurses outside of work. I will be their "friend" at work but rarely get together otherwise. It seems that nurses have been betrayed so they are skeptical about forming relationships. The doctors that I work for have invited me to activities with their families and I am so cautious that it is hard for me to accept their invitation. We have worked together for over two years and slowly I am letting my guard down. It is good to hear other nurses share the same delima.

rebel_red · Jan 4, 2003

Oftimes I wonder if it is just nurses who have been betrayed or if it is a more common phenomenon.........

Must agree though. I had a really rough go of it my first few weeks. Till one night I found my temper. I came in at 3am to cover the last four hours of a shift. (As a CNA mind you, I don't want to leave the false impression, that I am as yet a nurse.) The coworker that causes issues for everyone stopped me as I was preparing to answer a call light. Without meaning to (at least on a conscious level) I whipped around and bellowed "WHAT COULD YOU POSSIBLY WANT THAT IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THIS?" (flamboyant gesture towards call light.....) I rarely find my temper, my former administrator used to refer to me as "Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm on Speed....."

That coworker has been sweet as pie ever since. Kinda sad.. ain't it?

Tres

hoolahan, ASN, RN · Jan 4, 2003

Yes indeed.

I remember one night working in our OHS unit, which shared space with the med-surg ICU, split by a glass partition. I was having a staedy but quiet night. On the other side of the partition, however it was a diff story, each nurse had two pt's. 2 of the nurses were sitting down jawing away, while the other nurse was busting her azz w the two busiest pt's in the unit. She is an excellent nurse and typically abused like this. An IV pump starts to go off. I can hear it thru the partition. I initally ignore it, b/c look over and see 2 nurses itting on their orifices, so I figure, let them get off their lazy orifices and get that pump. After about 3 solid minutes (to me an eternity) I storm thru the door, figure out which direction the pump is alarming in, flamboyantly strutting there to answer it, reset the alarm, checked pt nameband, got new bag from med room, stopped in to check w nurse as to wether this is indeed the next bag she wants hung , she says yes, and I go back in the room and hang the bag.

The other two never even paused in their conversation to say thanks. In their unit, your assignment is YOURS! Call lights of another nurses pt's they won't answer. To me that is SAD!!!!!

I am very happy to say, that for the most part, in the CT ICU, we all worked hard and we were a well oiled team. Some of the nurses didn't like to do plebotomy, so they would get your pt am weight if you did their labs. It didn't really matter whose pt was whose, we just did whatever was needed to take care of the pt's safely thru the night.

The primary nurse of that pt came to thank me, and I asked her what was w her co-workers, she just rolled her eyes and explained how they only answered their own pt's alarms, unless it was a code, then they would help so they could be in on the action.

I just have NO tolerance at ALL for people who won't work. This must have been widely known where I was a charge nurse before, as I had a new nurse ask if it was slow, would it be OK if she did needlepoint. I said, as long as everyone has time to do needlepoint, then I don't have a problem if you do it too. She thought that was extremely fair. I guess they must have scared the shyt out of her with charge nurse tales of me! Those would be bad things lazy nurses have to say about me. If I would see a nurse sinking in the unit, I scanned the room to see who was sitting, and boom, you just bought the job of helper, and I helped too, I never sat unless everyone else did too. Our pt's got excellent care, and when we went home, we could feel good about what we did!

Who can explain the diff in work ethic?? I wish we could assess that accurately at start of hire.

sacikafe · Jan 4, 2003

I agree with hoolahan, but I do know that from my experience, the less you do, the harder it is to be motivated. That comes from within. I offer to help and some don't want help, or at least they don't want to have to ask or admit it. I also don't understand those nurses who sit and ignore alarms and call lights while others sink. On the other hand I have found some people are just clueless and really would help if you just tell them what to do.

debyan · Jan 4, 2003

I have had a couple of close friends in my working experience and I treasure them. Mostly I have acquaitences, people that I can enjoy at work, who cooperate well and we work as a team. My goal is mot to make friends but to do my job as well as I can and make it through another day with my sanity or my insanity intact, depending on who you speak to. deb;)