What is the dumbest order you ever read?

Any questions? Oh, I'd have so much fun with this. My favorite way to get back at someone who treats you as if you are stupid is to get really, really stupid. Pt's fam wants to know where the bathroom is? Where's the best place to grab a cup of coffee when the cafeteria is closed? Can they have a tissue/glass of water/bedpan? If there's a rise in inflection at the end, it's a question. Oh dooooooctooooooor...

I like the ones where the doctor thinks if he orders it, nurses have to do it. For instance, newly placed dobb hoff tube...md wrote order "Start tube feeding now, xray to follow". He specifically wrote that because I told him the feedings could only start after xrays verified and he wanted it started NOW. Yea, ok...xray showed dht not in place and had to be redone.

By very tired new intern:
NGT to beside bag.
Foley cath to LWS.